


A Devil Incarnate

by Momus



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anal Sex, Angst, Blood, Blowjobs, Death, F/M, Gore, M!preg, M/M, Omega!verse, Rape, Sexual Tension, Violence, handjobs, multi-chapter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-25
Updated: 2017-09-06
Packaged: 2018-08-11 01:30:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 45,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7870279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Momus/pseuds/Momus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaneki Ken is an average college student wanting to do average college student things: finish homework on time, go out with friends, and of course, date.  Being an Omega, his options aren't too great in the dating world, but that doesn't stop him from going after the girl of his dreams, Kamishiro Rize, but when he finally manages to score a date with her, his life goes from bad to worse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> IT BEGINS! This is the start of the long-awaited Omega!Verse Tokyo Ghoul fic I've been wanting to write. Thank you to those who supported me and encouraged me to take this idea on.  
> Updates will be SLOW as I'll be working on another fic at the same time, so please be patient and if you like this work, please leave a kudos and a comment, thank you <3
> 
> P.S.: I promise this won't be a written version of tokyo ghoul, I am going to change it up and keep it interesting, and I'll be updating tags as the story goes on.

Fear, love, hatred, anger – all these emotions and more were foreign to Kaneki, buried away with his memories of times past when he was still capable of feeling, of living.  All he knew now was loneliness and remorse as he dragged himself through one day to the next, wishing he could bring it all to an end and spare the world of himself.

But that was no longer an option, at least for now.  People – Ghouls -- counted on him, depended on him for his fighting spirit and ever-lasting loyalty; these were people who had become friends to him, people he once feared and knew only as monsters, people who were just like him.

Or were they?

Is he a Ghoul?  Or is he Human?

_I’m both.  I’m neither.  I can’t tell anymore.  Please, just let it all end._

Then, there was blackness as hands came up over his face and transformed him into something greater.


	2. Chapter 2

Saturday, a day like any other – the sun is shining brightly, the cool Autumn air reminding people of the coming Winter, dead leaves crunching beneath shoes, children laughing and playing in mountainous piles throughout the park while parents watch on, and best of all, no college classes to attend.

Of course, just like any other day, more half-eaten bodies have been discovered overnight.

It’s all over the news, the infamous Ghoul nicknamed “The Glutton” has attacked again in the same district, somehow limiting itself to its own territory.  Why it never finishes whole bodies is a mystery. Maybe it’s being interrupted?  Or perhaps it gets bored of a certain taste and moves on?

“Ugh, I don’t want to think about it.”

In the past fifty years or so, Ghouls arrived in Tokyo and other parts of the world, slowly at first until they were everywhere – no one knows where they came from or how they started, some say an experiment gone wrong, or a punishment from God for our destruction of the Earth and her creatures; but one thing was for certain, they lived long, are hard to kill (practically indestructible against man-made weapons), look just like Humans, and they can only survive on Human meat.  They’re monsters, nothing more.

Kaneki shakes the image of bloody corpses and ravenous monsters from his mind; this was definitely not the kind of thoughts he wanted on his mind, not when he was on his way to meet his friend at their favourite coffee shop, Anteiku cafe.  A cold breeze forces him to pull his jacket tighter around him, but then his leather collar itches again and he grunts in frustration as he sneaks his finger underneath the tight material to scratch at the irritated skin.

_I made it too tight again._

Suddenly, the scent of two Alphas blasts his face, carried by a gust of wind, and he looks down the trail to see a couple of friends, one man and one woman, staring him down as they, too, have caught his scent.  Reflexively, he ducks his head in an attempt to hide himself, but it’s no use, they already know he’s an Omega.

_Please just ignore me, I’m not here._

They pass each other calmly and the woman purrs at him, her hand grazing his arm in an attempt to gain his attention, but he ignores her and she huffs in annoyance. 

“I don’t understand Omegas, you’d think they’d be more…”

She’s too far off for him to hear her finish and Kaneki sighs.  In this world, there’s Humans and Ghouls, which split up into Omegas, Betas, and Alphas, which is determined once puberty hits and blood tests certify how one presents, although it’s usually easy to know just by smell.  The OBA construct was an evolutionary adaptation from long ago to help humans mate with their optimal partner, or their “fated mate” as some people refer to it.  Alphas are naturally strong, confident, and born leaders – they’re the CEO types, the MVP of sports, the VIP at clubs – that sort of thing.  Betas are just like any other person, the average joe, you could say; and then…there’s Omegas. Omegas are almost like Betas, but they give off an especially strong scent, like Alphas, that marks them as “mating material”.  It’s common belief Alphas and Omegas were meant to be paired together, but it’s not always like that; being human after all, there are many occurances of Omegas pairing with Betas or other Omegas, and vice versa for Betas and Alphas.  However, being Omega has it’s disadvantages – some people look down on them, expect them to settle for whoever “settles” for them, and others believe they’re the sex toys of Humankind.  It’s because of this belief many Omegas are attacked and raped and take advantage of.

Kaneki’s collar itches again, painful memories threatening to remind him of his first few months as an Omega, but he shakes those thoughts away.  Part of him wishes he weren’t an Omega so he could go through life unafraid and confident of himself, but then if he were Alpha he’d be pompous and righteous.  Maybe the answer is to be Beta, neither superior or inferior, but right in the middle.  Everyone would be on equal ground, no need for collars or mating rituals or anything of the sort, and Kaneki wouldn’t have to be afraid of being himself.

Then, another thought pops into his mind and he scoffs at his own stupidity.

_What am I saying? Even if everyone was Beta, there would still be Ghouls hunting down us humans._

Maybe he was doomed to be afraid from the start, to always be someone else’s prey.  The thought left an uneasy feeling in his stomach and he could taste bile in his throat.  The sooner he got to the café, the better.

* * *

The rest of the walk to the café was pleasant and by the time Kaneki arrived, the incident with the two Alphas was already gone from his mind.  He stepped through the glass door and instantly, the smell of freshly brewed coffee put him at ease.

“Kaneki!  Over here!”

His eyes darted to the source of the sound and he spotted his friend, Hide, another Omega like himself, in the far corner of the café, easily noticeable by his bright blond hair and flashy orange jacket.  He stood out from the rest of the crowd, not only because of his clothing, but his personality was something of note, too.  Always the optimist, the joker, the friend you could count on – you could say he was the sunshine on a rainy day.

Kaneki made his way over and sat down with a relieved sigh, working on removing his beige trench coat while Hide started talking about his day.  He always appreciated Anteiku whenever he came, there was no sense of hurry, no loud noises that berated his ears, and lastly, no smells to distract him.  Anteiku had recently installed new sensory wipers that detected all the different scents of Omegas, Betas, and Alphas and dulled them down completely.  All you could smell was the delectable scent of hot coffee.  Idly, his eyes would wander about the room, taking note of the small details that added to the atmosphere of Anteiku, like the way the barista poured the hot water in a circle over the coffee grounds, or the way the waitresses spoke with such polite demeanor he wondered how they dealt with difficult customers.  His eyes inevitably landed on their purple-haired waitress who was busy at the bar gathering two drinks and unfortunately, Hide caught him.

“Oh~, is that the girl you were talking about?  She’s pretty cute.”  Hide snickered when Kaneki’s cheekbones turned pink.

“That’s not her!  Though, she is cute.  It’s a different girl with purple hair, she comes here just as often as I do—“

“Excuse me!  Waitress!”

“Hide!”

To his horror, Hide called over their waitress in the most obnoxious way, earning a few disgruntled looks from the other customers; however, their ever-kind waitress walked over, acting as if she wasn’t just ordered over to their table.

“Would you like to order something?”

“Yes please, but first, my friend here would like to know your name.”

Kaneki’s jaw dropped – this was it, he could never come here again.

“Oh, um.”  She lowered her face, her bangs falling in front of her to hide her obvious embarrassment.  “My name is Kirishima Touka.”

“Kirishima Touka…that’s a really pretty name.  This is my friend, Kaneki Ken.”

“Hello, Kaneki-san.”  She was clearly just as embarrassed as he was.

“Kirishima-san, I’ll get an iced tea.  And Kaneki will get…?”

“A—uh—“

 _What coffee do I normally drink?  What’s coffee?  What’s a drink?_ Kaneki was so dumb-founded by what his so-called best friend just pulled he could hardly think, let alone decide a drink order.  He blurted out the first drink that came to mind.

“A c-cappuccino.”

She quickly bowed and hurried off to place their order.  Once she was gone, Kaneki groaned and cradled his face in his hands.

“I can never show my face here again.”

“Ah you’ll be fine. I doubt she’ll even remember you the next time you come.”

“Thanks.”  Kaneki sarcastically answered while Hide smiled wide.  He wasn’t even phased by the incident, was he even capable of being embarrassed?

His collar itched again and he snuck his finger underneath the leather binding to scratch at the burning skin.  Hide scoffed as he watched.

“I don’t know why you bother wearing that thing.  All you’re doing is announcing to everyone that you’re an Omega.”

“You know exactly why.  I shouldn’t have to mention it every time.  Besides, everyone would know anyway just by smelling me.”

“Well, _that time_ won’t happen again.  It was a couple of high school Alphas who couldn’t control themselves.  Adults aren’t like that.”

“They tried to _bond with me_ , Hide.  You don’t know what it’s like to think you might be bonded to someone forever that you don’t even like.”

“Yeah…I know.  It’s just…nevermind, I’m sorry I said anything.”

Kaneki didn’t want to think about that time again, but if wearing an itchy, old leather collar was the only way to keep some frantic Alpha from force-bonding him, then he’d wear it.   Hide used to wear the collar, too, but only because his mother made him during the first year of High School when he presented and his pheromones were at their strongest; once it was done, he threw it into the river.

Suddenly, the old brass bell hanging above the front of door jingled with gentle alarm, alerting the staff to an arriving customer and reflexively, Kaneki looked to the doorway and gasped, so quiet it was almost a whisper.

“It’s her.”

Hide whipped around, lacking all sense of subtlety, and stared at the woman who entered; she had brightly coloured hair in a soft shade of purple that hung down to her mid-back, swaying as she walked as did her dress that was modest and yet complimented her body.  Her face, well, she was _gorgeous_ , with her hair framing her face, her eyes matched her hair perfectly, even hidden behind square, thin glasses, their beauty shined through; her lips were thin and soft, with a subtle shade of pink that blended with her pale skin and made Kaneki wish he could feel them against his own.  She made her way to her usual table that along the back wall of the café and within seconds, Touka was there taking her order.

“Well, you might as well give up.  There’s no way a girl as beautiful as her is going to notice you.”

“Hey!”

“I’m just being honest.  She’s way out of your league.”

“I can still try.  I know she likes to read, she always brings a book with her when she comes.  I was thinking I could take her out to the bookstore.”  Kaneki smiled at the thought of he and her indulging in countless books together, tucked away in some intimate corner where they could lose themselves and ignore the world around them.

“A bookstore date?  Really? Girls don’t like that kind of stuff.”

“How would you know what a girl likes?  You’ve never been on a date before.”

“Well, yeah, but...okay, good point.”

Before Kaneki could mock him, Touka arrived with their drinks and placed them on the table.  Hide eyed Kaneki’s large drink that had a leaf decoration etched into the foam.

“Do you even like cappuccinos?”

“Shut up.”

Together they laughed, which apparently was loud enough to earn someone’s attention because Hide interrupted Kaneki to tell him his favourite girl was looking his way.  Kaneki mustered his courage and peeked over his shoulder and sure enough, their eyes met.  She smiled his way, not a polite “please don’t look at me” smile, but a sincere, genuine smile that told him “I want you to look at me more” and Kaneki’s heart melted as he smiled back.

For him, that moment meant everything, and from that day forward his destiny was forever changed.

Two days later, he was back at the café, taking a break from classes to prepare for the afternoon.  He pulled out his favourite book, “Black Goat’s Egg” by Takatsuki Sen, and readied himself for another thrilling chapter when the bell rang and the purple-haired woman returned.  Kaneki was captivated by her grace and beauty and watched as she sat down at her favourite spot and pulled out a book.  His heart stopped when he saw the title.

“Black Goat’s Egg…she reads it, too!”

She must have felt eyes on her because she looked up to see Kaneki staring at her and her book; at first, Kaneki panicked thinking he’d be mistaken for a creep, but then she saw the title of his book and smiled, so he smiled back.  They nodded at each other, approving of each other’s choice of reading material, then returned to their novels.  Even though they were tables apart in a busy café on a Monday afternoon, Kaneki felt as if they were closer than ever.

Three more days past and Kaneki is elated, he can hardly keep himself together while he dials up Hide’s number.  As it rings, he waits at the street crossing, his body vibrating excitedly and his cheeks hurting from how big he’s smiling.

“Guess what!” he says as soon as Hide answers.

“What—“

“She said yes!  We’re going on a date this Sunday!”

“Who said yes?!  Kirishima?”

“No!  That girl we saw last time, with the glasses. Her name is Kamishiro Rize.”  Kaneki hummed as he spoke her name, etching it into his memory forever.

“No way!  She actually said yes?!”

“Yes way!  We’re going to the bookstore, and then dinner.”

“Ma—an, Kaneki don’t blow this!  You’ll never get a second chance!”

“I know!  I’ll call you on Sunday and tell you all about it.”

“See ya!”

He hangs up just in time before the light changes and heads on his way back home.  Sunday can’t come soon enough.

* * *

On the day of, Kaneki gets up early to shower and eat and finish up his homework for the week before finally leaving to meet Rize.  They choose a bookstore downtown that has a café, something different from the regular Anteiku, and spend an hour or so perusing the aisles, both fiction and non-fiction, hoping to find something new and exciting. It’s the first time Kaneki has smelled her, she’s an Alpha, and her scent reminds him of spring flowers; its so warm and inviting he can barely keep his mind straight when he’s around her and he hopes he smells just as delightful to her.

They decide to make their date a little more intimate and challenge each other to find a book for the other; it starts out serious, each one picking something dark and thought-provoking, but then Rize picks out “Yoga for New Mom’s” for Kaneki and suddenly it’s turned into “who can find the most insulting book” challenge.  Eventually, they get hungry and on the way to their dinner location, a small bistro, Rize inches closer and holds Kaneki’s hands, and on this cold Autumn day, Kaneki’s never felt warmer.

It’s during dinner he notices her lack of appetite; she’s hardly eaten her sandwich while he’s already eaten more than half of his teriyaki beef.  Perhaps she doesn’t like the food?  Whatever it is, Rize catches him staring at her food and she apologizes.

“I suppose I should have mentioned.  I’m actually on a diet right now.”

“That’s okay, I don’t mind.  I was just worried that perhaps you didn’t like the food?”

“No, not at all.  It’s actually quite good, I think I’m going to take the rest of it home for later.  Um, please excuse me.”

She rises from her chair and heads towards the bathroom and Kaneki breathes a sigh of relief.  He’s all tense around her, he’s worried he’s going to say or do something wrong, yet when she’s around and her scent envelops him, he’s relaxed and cradled by it, leaving him vulnerable and open to her every whim.  He can’t get enough of her and he hopes that this won’t be the last time they see each other.

By the end of dinner, the sun has set and Tokyo is lit up with artificial lights as people make their way back home.  Kaneki and Rize stand outside the bistro, getting ready to part ways.

“Thank you for coming out with me tonight, I really enjoyed our time together.”

Kaneki bows politely and Rize returns it.

“Thank you, for everything.  I had a nice time, too.”

“Um,” Kaneki stumbles, his heart pounding in his chest and hands trembling. “Would it be okay if…I saw you again?”

Her eyes light up and her lips break into a quaint smile.  “Yes, I’d love to see you again.”

“That’s…that’s great!  Thank you!”

Kaneki can’t stop smiling, he’s almost embarrassed by how happy he is, but the thought of never seeing her again was too painful to bear, so he can’t keep himself from celebrating; but, Rize’s not smiling, in fact she looks almost…fearful.

“Um, Rize-san?  What’s wrong?”

“Kaneki-san, I—“ Her eyes are tearing up, she brings her hands to her mouth in an attempt to cover her quivering lips. “I’m so sorry.  I hate to ask this of you, but…I live in the area where all those horrible attacks are happening and I’m just so afraid of going home.  Could you please walk me home?”

“Ah, of course!  You don’t need to worry about asking me, it’s no hassle at all.”  Kaneki reassures her and places his hand on her shoulder, gently stroking her with his thumb and Rize sighs and visibly relaxes.

“Thank you, you have no idea how relieved I am.  Come, it’s this way.”

Side-by-side, they walk together towards her home.  Admittedly, Kaneki is a little afraid of walking into a potentially dangerous area where Ghouls have been attacking, but he doesn’t let his fear show for Rize’s sake.  They eventually turn down a side alley, off the main street, and the eerie silence of the secluded area sends chills down Kaneki’s spine.

_How can she live here?  I’d be terrified of stepping out of my house every day.  She must be way braver than she lets on._

“Is your apartment nearby?”  Kaneki looks to his side, but she’s not there.

“Rize-san?”

Turning around, he sees her standing a few feet behind him, her head turned down so her hair covers her face.

“What’s wrong?  Is everything alright?”

He steps towards her, then freezes when he notices the hungry gleam in her eyes.

_No._

“Oh, I’m doing just fine, Kaneki-san.  But I’m afraid you’re the one who’s in trouble.”

Her eyes, they’ve turned black with blaring red irises.  The signature eyes of a Ghoul.

Kaneki needs to run, but he can’t move.  His throat is dry and his voice is gone, he’s completely numb.  Rize’s haunting laughter rings in his ears and makes his heart stop with fear and the awful realization he’s about to be eaten alive, torn apart limb-by-limb, gutted and left out for some unsuspecting person to find in the morning.

_No.  No, no, no!  Please don’t kill me!_

“Look at you, you’re so scared.  You’re so pathetic!”

Out from behind her, glowing red limbs burst forth, their pointed ends aimed at Kaneki.  One strikes forward, knocking him backwards through a wire gate of a construction site and into a cement wall, forcing all the air out from his lungs as two or more ribs break and fracture.

“You know, I really did like you, even though you’re a filthy Omega.  You’re sweet and kind, and I can’t wait to taste your insides and scramble them up!”

The image of his intestines being wrenched from his lifeless form pops into his spotty conscious and he cringes in horror.  He can’t die today, not like this.  He musters up whatever strength he has left and instantly regrets it as jabbing pain shoots from all over – his knees, his shoulder, his fingers – he doesn’t want to think about how many broken bones he has.  Rize laughs as she watches him struggle.  He knows he won’t escape, and yet he slides himself along the cement wall nonetheless.  Then, in one swooping motion, he’s given up.

He’s suspended in the air, dangling by one of her supernatural limbs like a worm on a hook.  He grabs at it helplessly, trying to pry himself off but only forces more torrents of his own blood to spill out of him and drip off to the ground.  He tries to scream, tries to beg her to stop, but again more blood pours from his lips and the metallic taste that fills his mouth is gut-wrenching.

“Yes, struggle some more my dear Kaneki.  Your fear will only make you taste even more delectable!”

In the end, all he can do is cry.  Rize cackles as his tears fall and his body goes limp in defeat.  His last wish is that he dies before she feasts on him.

_Why?  Why did she have to be a Ghoul?_

Suddenly, Rize goes quiet and her eyes dart above her.  Something is coming, but he’s too weak to see.  He’s dropped to the ground and tumbles away a few inches, her spine-tingling scream echoes in the emptiness of the construction site before being drowned out by the sound of crashing metal.  The ground beneath him rocks, pieces of broken cement fly over him, and then…

All turns to black.


	3. Chapter 3

**“…yet another Ghoul attack has left one family without a father and a husband.  The body of Yamashiro Hiro, a middle-school teacher in Shinjuku, was found just blocks away from his home behind a convenience store.  He was found by the…”**

“More bodies, when is it ever going to stop?”

Hide yawned mid-sentence and scratched his stomach underneath his loose long-sleeved shirt as he stood in front of the microwave waiting for his noodles to finish cooking.  Today had been exceptionally boring; with Kaneki gone on his date, Hide was left with hardly anything to do.  He did go out for a run, then came back home to sleep, then ate lunch, then slept again.  Of course, there was homework he could do, but as usual all his textbooks were at school and his writings were shoved at the bottom of his backpack, not even looked at once all weekend.

“I wonder how Kaneki’s date went?  He probably stuttered and fumbled a lot; he always does when he’s nervous.  Poor guy.”

**_BEEEEEEP. BEEEEEP._ **

Normally, Hide was excited about food, but when he pulled out the Styrofoam container and looked down at the steaming cup of noodles, his stomach grumbled with disappointment.

_Nothing a little hot sauce can’t fix._

Grabbing his sriracha sauce, he headed for the television and sat down on the floor right in front to continue watching.

“ **This just in, a severe accident at a construction site in the Ginza district has resulted in the death of—“**

“No more news for today.  OH!  There should be a new episode of…”

Hurriedly, Hide flipped through the channels until he came to a popular action-drama series he had been keeping up with.  Satisfied, he set the remote down and leaned back against his bed, prepping his noodles with the sriracha sauce and settling in for the night.

At least, that’s what he had planned.

His phone vibrated, loud enough he could hear it shaking against the kitchen counter, and just when he got all comfortable, too; but the thought it might be Kaneki calling for an update made him get up from his spot on the floor and rush over.  However, it definitely wasn’t Kaneki.

Within two minutes, Hide was dressed and out the door, running for the nearest train station to go to Kanou General Hospital.  It was only a ten-minute train ride, thankfully, so he was there in no time.  He was breathless, tired, and hungry; but none of that mattered because right now his best friend was undergoing surgery for an organ transplant.

Since Kaneki had no close family he spoke to, Hide was his emergency contact; he sat in the waiting room of the surgical unit going over the details while Kaneki’s surgery went on.  Kaneki had been attacked by a Ghoul; the doctors wouldn’t give the identity of the woman, but Hide knew right away it was Rize since she would have been the last woman he was with.  Apparently, a construction site crashed down on them, saving Kaneki before she could eat him, but he sustained multiple injuries through his abdomen and was on the brink of death when the emergency team found him.  He needed a transplant.  This surgery was the only thing that could save his life.

_Did she attack right away?  Maybe she waited until it was darker.  She probably did so she could earn his trust.  God fucking dammit Kaneki, you’re always so careful when it comes to people!_

“Fuck!”

Hide was beyond frustrated.  He wanted to help Kaneki, but there was nothing he could do except wait the twenty hours and be there for him when he woke up.  Until then, he was helpless. 

During that time, he made a makeshift bed out of two chairs for when he needed to doze off, and made multiple trips to the vending machines for food and drinks.  The wait was maddening; the dull strain of the fluorescent lights never ceased, the quiet room only amplified his worried thoughts, but after almost a full day, the surgeon, Professor Kanou himself, announced Kaneki had survived and was currently in the recovery room.  Hide just about cried with relief, but managed to withhold his emotions while Kanou spoke to him.  He was an older man, probably in his mid-60’s, with neatly combed gray hair and light wrinkles decorating his face.  He stood tall and proud, like a man who had achieved everything he wanted. 

Kanou explained Kaneki would need to stay at the hospital for at least a week to be monitored in case of organ rejection and while he was in immediate recovery, there were to be no visitors due to his supressed immunity and weakened state.

That wasn’t acceptable.  Hide had been waiting here every hour, every minute, for the past twenty-one hours.  He needed to see Kaneki.

“Can’t I see him?  Even through a window or something?  He’s my best friend, I have to make sure he’s okay.”

The old surgeon sighed, ready to reject Hide once more if he hadn’t persisted.

“Please!  I promise I’m not sick. I run every day and eat healthy!  I mean, sort of healthy.  Mostly healthy.  Anyway I’m not sick, please just let me see him then I swear I’ll leave!”

“Alright, fine.  But only for a moment.  He’s in a delicate state.”

“Thank you Professor Kanou.  You have no idea how worried I’ve been.”

Hide promptly followed Kanou down the hallway and through the surgery doors to the recovery area.  There were a few other patients in the room, each with their own nurse at their bedside and machines and intravenous bags hanging next to them, and in the corner was a doorway to a separate room where more sensitive patients were held.   Here, Kaneki lay in a closed off room with two nurses monitoring him. He had an oxygen mask attached to his face, bruising to his right side, matted blood in his hair from his struggle with Rize, and his body was completely limp. 

_He’s always been a little weaker than most, but I’ve never seen him so vulnerable before._

“See?  Your friend is fine.”

Hide nodded, but the lump in his throat didn’t go away. He wanted to be at Kaneki’s bedside so he could nurture him and help him heal.  He wanted to mend his wounds, touch his skin, and smell his scent that he adored so much, but all hospitals had the same scent-dampeners that Anteiku had to minimize distractions and for once Hide cursed them.  In truth, he wanted to be by Kaneki’s side for one reason alone: he loved him. 

From the moment they met, they were attached to the hip and Hide adored Kaneki because for once in his life someone was able to put up with his loud and bubbly personality.  They read together, played together, had sleepovers, talked about which girls they liked, what movies they wanted to see and which ones bombed.  They did every thing together, and that never ceased as they grew older.  It was during middle school after Hide presented as an Omega, the same as Kaneki, that he finally realized how he felt.  He and Kaneki were going to stay together forever, but he knew there was a chance Kaneki wouldn’t feel the same, so he settled with being his best friend because as long as he was with him, he was okay.

* * *

A full day passed before Kaneki was out of immediate recovery and Hide was prompt to visit him during his first day on the ward.  He was elated to talk to him again, but when he approached the young nurse at the front desk he was told Kaneki wasn’t accepting _any_ visitors.

“That can’t be right.  I’m his best friend. His only contact in Tokyo.  Ask him again.”

“I’m sorry, but he was told us he didn’t want to see _anyone._ Those are his wishes.  If you’d like, I can pass on a message to him.” 

She was firm as she spoke, her brown eyes hard and focused, showing she wasn’t going to give in and Hide wasn’t the type to push people.  It didn’t make any sense though; why would Kaneki be refusing visitors?  He had just survived a Ghoul attack.  He was a modern day hero!  So why would he isolate himself?

“Sir?”  Hide broke away from his thoughts at the sound of the nurse’s voice.  “Do you want to leave a message?”

“Um…can you just tell him Hide was here?  And…that I’ll be by in a couple days.”

The nurse nodded, jotting down his words on a sheet of scrap paper, then he left.  For whatever reason, Kaneki wanted space.  Maybe he didn’t want to be seen post-surgery, who knows, and maybe if he knew of Hide’s arrival ahead of time he’d be more willing to see him.  For now, Hide was willing to give him the time he needed to recover from his trauma.

Two days later, Hide stopped by just like he said he would, with a bag full of some daily essentials for Kaneki, including his phone charger.  To his dismay, Kaneki was still refusing to be seen, but after the items were delivered by the nurse and Hide was on his way out, his phone dinged with a new message from Kaneki.

**> >I’m okay.  Thank you for bringing my stuff.**

The excitement of getting some form of communication from Kaneki left Hide buzzing.  It would have been smart to show some kind of restraint, but he was so full of questions and at times Hide was too impulsive for his own good.

**> How are you doing?  Are you hurting?!  Do you have some gnarly scars now?  I can’t believe she was a Ghoul!  I knew she was too pretty to be true!  Professor Kanou told me all about it.  Why won’t you let me see you?!  Are you all disfigured and mutant-looking now?**

He waited with baited breath – honestly, he wouldn’t blame Kaneki for ignoring him, even he could admit he went a little overboard with his message, but then a new message popped up.

**> >You’re right, she was too good to be true.  I’m sorry for turning you away, I just don’t want to be seen by anyone.  I’m so embarrassed.  Please understand, Hide.**

Another deep sigh.

**> Yeah…okay.  Promise me we’ll hang out when you’re out though, okay?  We’ll go the Big Girl again, my treat.  Get better!**

**> >Okay.  Promise.**

* * *

The week dragged by at a sloth’s pace.  Kaneki and Hide kept in touch via cell phone, but that seemed to make time pass slower as Hide waited for his messages until finally, Kaneki was discharged.  Of course, Hide wanted to be there to meet him at the hospital, but Kaneki insisted on being left alone saying he was fully capable of taking himself home.

**> >I need to catch up on homework so I’m going straight home after anyway.  No point in wasting your time.**

“It’s not a waste of time, stupid.  Haah…why’s he gotta be so difficult?”

**> Fine, fine.  Let’s go to Big Girl tomorrow! **

**> >Okay.**

Something about Kaneki’s response bothered Hide, but he ignored it.  Kaneki was a secretive guy, he preferred to keep his troubles to himself and for the most part Hide respected his privacy, but there were a few times during their friendship Hide had to break down his mental walls he so fervently tried to keep up.  One such incident was when they went swimming as kids; they were in the change room, Hide was so excited for their first swim of the summer and Kaneki was exceptionally quiet – he can remember how hard Kaneki tried to hide himself with the locker door as he changed, but it was no use, he saw them: the bruises his mother had left on his ribs.

When a stranger does something bad to your friend, your first instinct as a child is to go tell their parents, but then what do you do when it is the parent doing something bad?  It was the first time Hide felt helpless and even though Kaneki fought and denied their existence, he eventually fell to Hide’s persistence and told him everything; even though there wasn’t anything he could do to stop it, Hide made sure to always be there for Kaneki.  His mom passed away later that year and even after the horrible abuse, Kaneki still cried at her funeral and sometimes, in the dead silence of the night during their sleepovers, he would express how much he missed her and wished she were still alive.

Hide never forgot those days or the promise he made to always be his best friend, so although Kaneki was struggling with another loss and another trauma, Hide would be there to help him through it.

So, the next day when he waited at Big Girl, Hide put on his biggest smile and did his best to be happy and positive for Kaneki (not that it was particularly hard since he was naturally positive anyway).  All around him people laughed and talked and ate away at their meal; couples both young and old, friends and family – the atmosphere was relaxed and casual, one of the reasons why Hide and Kaneki liked this restaurant so much.  And of course, the burgers.  The smell of fresh beef cooking on the grill filled the air, making Hide’s mouth water and his stomach grumble; he couldn’t even notice the pheromones in the air unless he paid particular attention to it.  As minutes passed and turned into an hour, Hide’s smile faded and his stomach growled angrily with hunger.

**> Kaneki!  Where are you man?  It’s been an hour already!**

He waited impatiently for him to respond, his foot tapping insistently on the hard floor as he watched his phone screen, but there was no response, which meant he’d have to call.  Kaneki’s phone rang twice, meaning it wasn’t off, so Hide waited…and waited…and—

“Hide…”

“Kaneki!  What the hell, did you get my text?”

“I’m…I’m sorry, I can’t go.”

“Why not?  What’s going on?”

“Nothing, I just can’t go.  I’m…not feeling good, sorry.  Please understand.”

“Kaneki!”

It was too late, Kaneki already hung up.  Worry gnawed away at Hide, making his stomach knot with an uneasy tightness.  He couldn’t even think about food anymore, there was something going on with Kaneki and he had to find out what.  Grabbing his messenger bag, he quickly left the restaurant and its delectable smell behind and hurried to Kaneki’s dorm on his university campus.  He wasn’t exactly sure how he was going to get inside his room since he wasn’t particularly good with words and Kaneki already made it clear he wanted to be alone, but as he neared his campus it became apparent that wasn’t going to be an issue; just down the street from the main entrance of the campus, Hide recognized Kaneki in his bright green sweater, his shoulders hunched over and hood up.  

_Definitely not his usual self.  Something’s up._

Hide followed, making sure to keep his distance so Kaneki wouldn’t sniff him out.  Kaneki wound through the streets aimlessly, his hands tucked away in his pockets and his head low; sometimes, he would stop next to a group of people and just watch them, standing still and seemingly ignoring everything except for the people next to him.  It was eerie the way he looked at them, and if Hide were looking at the right angle he could see his mouth moving but no words coming out, like he were speaking only to himself.  At one point, a young woman accidentally brushed against him and he reacted like he just hit shoulders with somebody as he jerked away from her and his feet clumsily tried to catch their footing on the ground. 

Yet, the weirdest event of all had yet to occur.  He was at a street crossing, meandering his way through the thick clump of people that passed by when suddenly he stopped right in the middle.  He was lost in his own world, his head remained drooped, his hands slack at his side and his hood up to protect him from the drizzling rain, but he didn’t even seem to notice or even care.  The only time he moved was when a young girl passed him – his body turned slowly, his eyes following her and Hide had to dodge behind the street pole to hide himself, but he was still able to peek around it and again, he could just barely see Kaneki’s lips moving as he muttered -- if only he could read lips! 

Kaneki remained in his zombie-like state even when everyone else had finished crossing and the crosswalk light turned to stop any further pedestrians.  The opposing light turned green, the cars started moving, but Kaneki was still in the middle of the road!  Hide panicked; why wouldn’t he move?

“Kane--!”

**_HOOOOONK_ **

A garbage truck sounded its horn just a few feet away from Kaneki and that seemed to grab his attention; Kaneki’s head whipped around and he finally understood the situation he was in and hurriedly crossed the road.  Hide had no choice but to stay behind, but it would be easy enough to follow his friend since he moved so slow anyway.  Now, he was more confused than ever after seeing Kaneki’s strange behaviour and wherever Kaneki was going, if anywhere at all, Hide needed to know where. 

Then suddenly, without any warning whatsoever, Kaneki darted down an alleyway.

_No you idiot, what are you doing!  You just survived a Ghoul attack, are you trying to get attacked again?!_

A horrible, heavy weight anchored deep in his gut.  What if he _was_ trying to get attacked again?  Is Kaneki the type to commit suicide?  Would he throw himself into danger so it could be done for him?

Hide wanted desperately to say no to all those questions, but a nagging voice in the back of his mind told him otherwise; he needed to get to Kaneki.  Now. 

Looking both ways to make sure the coast was clear, he dashed across the road, ignoring the loud protests of other pedestrians and their scolding glares.  He turned the corner of the alleyway – luckily there was only one way to go since it didn’t split off – and after just a few more meters of running he turned left and came face-to-face with Kaneki.  He was on his knees in a pool of blood, his backed turned to Hide and shoulders shaking, his hands up to his face and the sound of agonizing cries breaking the lonesome silence on the alley.  In front of him lay the torn up body of a man, his eyes rolled back to the sky and mouth hanging open unnaturally; the very sight had Hide’s hair standing on end, but what’s more was what he _smelled._ He expected to smell the familiar scent of his friend, of an Omega, but instead he smelled—

_An Alpha?  That can’t be.  Is there someone else here with us?_

“Ka…Kaneki?”  Hide choked out, his mind racing as he tried to piece together the situation before him.

At the sound of his voice, Kaneki’s shaking shoulders came to a halt and his hands dropped into his lap; slowly, he turned and even with his hood still covering his head, Hide could see the glaring black sclera of his left eye, the red iris boring into him with a predatory piercing gaze he had never felt before and for the first time, he knew true fear.

Kaneki stood in one smooth motion, his menacing black and red eye never leaving Hide’s gaze.  His cheeks were stained with tears and upon seeing Hide, more poured down his cheeks and dripped off his chin.

“Hide…” he smiled when he saw Hide, sending chills down the Human’s spine as drool seeped from the corners of his mouth and mixed with his tears,

“You smell so good.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've changed this story so many times, but now I finally know where I want it to go and I am SO EXCITED! I can't wait to share it with you all <3

“Haah…haah…"

Kaneki’s chest heaved with his heavy breaths, filling his lungs with damp air from Tokyo’s humidity.  The rain fell with a deafening pitter-patter as it hit the hard ground, silencing almost everything around him.  His bright green hoodie was soaked right through, but he hardly noticed – his body was hot, _too hot,_ he felt as if he were broiling inside and all he could focus on was who stood before him against the concrete building.

“Hide…”

He lunged forward, stopping just in front with his eyes focused on Hide.  He smelled absolutely delectable, like pork ribs grilling on the barbecue and he couldn’t contain the drool from pooling in his mouth as he spoke. 

“Hide…your scent…”

He moved in closer, licking his lips, dipping next to his ear and sighing into it after he took a deep inhale.  He could sense how tense Hide was, could feel his breath stutter over his ear as Hide tried to keep himself calm and steady.  Apart from the smell of flesh, Kaneki smelled something else – his natural Omega scent, something he had smelled countless times before but now it was amplified and smelled sweeter than ever.  It made his head feel light, made him nuzzle his forehead against Hide’s cheek and pull him in close to his body so they were pressed tightly against each other.  The more he smelled Hide, the more he lost himself – he couldn’t think, couldn’t speak, all he could do was react to whatever part of his brain was controlling him, except he didn’t know if he wanted to eat Hide or fuck him.

“Hide….why…why.”

“Kaneki!”  Hide gasped.

Kaneki rutted against him, keeping his arms tight around his body and his chin on his shoulder, enveloping himself with Hide’s scent.

“Uhn…Hide.” He slurred, grinding his hardness against Hide’s crotch.

Hide moaned as their groins rubbed against each other, his breaths becoming uneven and laboured and it was then Kaneki was hit with an overwhelming warm sensation and the air went from damp rain and barbecue pork to something light and floral, filling his nose and lungs with its scent and making his cock ache with want.  Pulling away for a moment, he examined Hide – his usually fluffy blond hair was soaked and stuck to his head and face with droplets riveting down his smooth skin; his eyes were dilated and lids heavy; his lips moist and swollen, probably from him biting down on them, and instantly Kaneki understood.

Hide was in heat. 

“Kaneki…please…don’t leave me like this.”

Hide begged with his body, pulling Kaneki’s crotch back against him with his hands on his hips, gripping at his belt and gently pulling in hopes of it falling off.   Kaneki couldn’t help but succumb to his instinct and desires and the next few minutes were simply a blur in his mind’s eye.  Quickly, Hide was stripped of his pants as Kaneki’s cock was released, exposing them both to the cold air surrounding them.  Hide was easily lifted by his thighs and pinned against the rough wall, his legs wrapping around Kaneki’s waist almost too naturally as they sat perfectly on his hips.

“Kaneki, please—hurry.”  His voice shook with impatience, turning Kaneki on even more.

Searching fingers found Hide’s entrance, already slicked up by his natural lubrication – as a male Omega, whenever they went into heat their body brought forth a fluid similar to that of a female to help ease the mating process.  Excitedly, Kaneki dipped his hips and pressed himself against Hide’s hole, adding his pre-cum to his lubrication until pushing inside all in one go.  Hide cried, his nails boring into Kaneki’s shoulders and legs squeezing impossibly tight around him.  Even with the fluid, it was clearly too much to bear, but the heat of Hide’s body surrounding Kaneki’s length was too distracting for him to properly care.  Then, something dripped down Kaneki’s cock and out of sheer curiosity he swiped it up with his finger and brought it to his face; it was blood, bight red and thick, and it brought back those predatory desires he had been feeling just moments before.  Hesitantly, he brought his fingertip to his mouth and lightly sucked the blood off – it was _incredible,_ it melted in his mouth like chocolate and his tongue waved about searching for more.

“Kaneki…”  Hide whispered and Kaneki looked to him then with his black eye and saw the fear that resided within.

Hide’s lips quivered, whether it was from fear or the cold he couldn’t tell, but then tears fell from his reddened eyes and mixed with the rain on his cheeks.  Kaneki’s heart broke; he didn’t want Hide to be scared, he wanted to comfort him and hold him close, but deep in the pit of his stomach he also wanted to tear him apart and gorge on his innards and that terrified Kaneki more than anything else. His tears started up again, as did the drool when he thought of Hide’s warm insides filling his stomach to the brim and suddenly Kaneki was tormented with an utter sense of self-loathing.

“Hide…what’s wrong with me?”  he asked in a broken voice.

The ever-sweet Hide sniffled and caressed his cheeks with his thumbs, not knowing how badly Kaneki wanted to bite them off and chew on them like dry riblets.

“It’s okay, just focus on me.” He uttered, dropping his hips to take in more of Kaneki’s hot erection and sighing as he did so.

The stimulation of Hide’s tight muscles sucking him in flipped Kaneki entirely and he growled with renewed heat, gripping Hide’s hips and forcing his cock upwards and into Hide’s accepting body.  Hide gasped, his head dropping so he could watch Kaneki move back and forth into him, his cock becoming discoloured with blood and cum as it disappeared inside him; Kaneki inched closer until their foreheads touched and the steam from their hot breaths filled the space between them.

“Hide, Hide—nh!  So good.  So hot.”

“Haah, haah—f-faster!”

Kaneki obeyed, thrusting faster into him and using his strength to help Hide slam down onto his cock and meet him, but it still wasn’t enough.  He wanted to wreck Hide and make a mess out of him, to put his mark on him and claim him forever; he had never felt such an insistent need before, was this what it was like to be an Alpha?  Or was this part of being a Ghoul?

He stopped suddenly and let Hide drop from his waist before forcing him to turn around and push against the wall; Hide braced himself with his hands, raised his hips and arched his back to receive him and was rewarded with a smooth, hard thrust as Kaneki re-entered. 

“Shit!  Ah!” 

Hide threw his head back and grit his teeth; Kaneki knew it hurt, but he couldn’t hold himself back.  He was driven to mate with Hide as Hide as driven to accept him and everything he had to offer.  Hide tightened around him as he thrust quickly in and out and clawed against the rock wall with his cheek rocking into it.  Hide’s smell was even stronger now, he was getting close; his warm insides pulsed and tightened around Kaneki’s cock, urging him on and Kaneki used everything he had to pound deeper into him.  His climax was nearing, his time to impregnate Hide and claim him was coming ever closer.

“Kaneki!  Uhn!  Oh god!  P-please!  Bite me!”

Hide touched his chin to his chest and reached back to push aside the hair from his neck.  Kaneki’s heart raced when he saw the exposed skin offered to him so generously; the Alpha in him told him to bite down and become mates with Hide, and the Ghoul in him told him to rip out a chunk and see if he could swallow it all down in on go.  His mouth drooled and his stomach growled with starvation while his cock ached with the need to orgasm and his head went light with thoughts of mating and claiming his own Omega.  He was in a daze as he neared closer, bending over Hide’s form and opening his mouth wide, letting his drool spill and drip onto Hide’s bare neck…

But then it was all over, an intense force knocked into Kaneki’s side, throwing him across the alleyway until he collided with a separate building, knocking his head on the way down to the ground.  His vision was momentarily spotty and black, all he could see was a person with huge red wings helping Hide down to the ground.

“Don’t touch him!” he called out, thinking it was someone trying to claim him for themselves.  He scrambled to his feet and rushed forward, stumbling on the way until his vision cleared.

“He’s mine!”

As he neared, the person he saw was a young woman, with short purple hair that blocked half her face.  Her wings were red and luminescent, swirling about like hellfire to their tips.  She looked familiar to him, where had he seen her before?

Before he could get too close, one of her wings struck him again, this time to the wall opposite of Hide, hitting it hard enough to force the air from his lungs.  He fell to the ground and clamoured onto all fours in a panic, gasping for air and trying to get his lungs to work again.

“You idiot.”  The woman sneered at Kaneki, standing before him with her wings shadowing his form.

“What the hell were you thinking?”

Kaneki was still gasping, but his breaths were coming on a little easier now.  He peered up to her, facing her two black eyes and wrinkled nose as she looked down at him with disgust and resentment.  Now he recognized her – it was the waitress from Anteiku, Kirishima Touka.  She was a Ghoul, too?

“He’s my---I need to---“ 

“You need to eat!” 

For a moment she left his sight, then returned promptly with something in her palm.  She pushed it towards him and the smell of old flesh rushed into his nose, exciting his senses all over again.  He realized then she was holding a chunk of the dead man he had found and his panic rose up once more.

“I can’t!  It’s…I won’t eat a human!”

“You must!  You’ll go insane if you don’t.”

Kaneki refused to listen.  Instead, he looked to Hide who lay on the cold ground in the fetal position with his pants loosely pulled up to his waist.  Being separated from him, he was able to think a bit more clearly and realize he was dangerously close to biting Hide – the question is, would he have simply marked him or devoured him?

“I don’t have time for this.”

Kaneki made the mistake of letting his mouth hang open and Touka shoved the wet meat inside; at first there was nothing, but then his mouth instinctively chewed and chewed and that luxurious taste pervaded his mouth and melted into it, covering every inch until…he swallowed.  Instantly, he felt better; his stomach pain subsided, his headache was disappearing, and his insatiable thirst was finally being satisfied.  If such a small amount could do this, what difference could a whole person make? 

_No, I didn’t just think that.  There’s no way I can eat somebody._

He looked to the dead man lying just a few feet away and his stomach lurched with vile realization of what he had just done. 

“Hck!  Agh!”  He pushed Touka away and forced his fingers down his throat, making himself gag and gag until he spat the flesh back up. 

“You stupid shit!”

Touka kicked him this time up against the wall, over and over before grabbing him by his sweater and forcing him to stand upright.

“You think this is hell?  You think you can _never_ eat a human?  Being a hungry Ghoul is worse than hell.”

In her eyes sparked hatred and pain, and Kaneki couldn’t even imagine what she had been through all her life, but even in the face of an enraged creature such as her, he still couldn’t bring himself to willfully eat another person.  Then, out of nowhere Hide groaned and Kaneki looked to see his body curling in on itself.  Touka looked back and her wings disappeared into her back, but her eyes remained black and angry; she stomped towards Hide and Kaneki feared for the worst as she raised her foot over his head.

“Stop!  You can’t!”

“I can and I will!  He knows you’re a Ghoul.  He has to die!”

“No!”

“Touka-chan, enough.”

From the shadows, a deep voice called out and immediately Touka halted.  Whoever it was, Touka seemed to recognize him and Kaneki was thankful for their interception, for he was far too weak to stop her.

“Manager…why are you here?”

“Because, Touka-chan.” Slowly, he emerged, his black eyes shining against the red iris – Kaneki recognized him as the manager from Anteiku.  They made eye contact, only briefly, but it was enough to send chills down Kaneki’s spine.

“We need to discuss something very important.”

* * *

When Hide first woke, he felt groggy and confused.  He could smell coffee, he felt cold, and he couldn’t hear anything except for the quiet ticking of a clock hanging on the wall across from him.  He was on a beige couch with a simple gray blanket covering him and he was alone.  Looking to the window above him on the wall the rain had stopped, but the sky was still gray and dark.

“Ugh…where am I?  How long was I out for?”

He couldn’t discern any details of his location from his surroundings, but he felt as if he were in someone’s home.   He sat up and a sudden sharp pain shot through his hips and up his spine; he hissed through his teeth and reached to touch the small of his back, then he was bombarded with memories.

_“Please!  Bite me!”_

He gasped, his hand flew up to his neck and felt for an indentation; his fingers searched his skin for any sort of sign he had bonded with Kaneki, but his heart sank knowing he would find nothing.  As the memories came to him, he relived every detail. 

_I can’t believe it.  Me and Kaneki…we actually had sex._

It was something Hide had admittedly thought about many times, but he never dreamed it would happen; he remembered Kaneki’s smell, his _Alpha_ smell and a small smile played across his face. He remembered how he felt when he was inside, how hot he was to the touch, how aggressive and forceful he was and how undeniably sexy Hide found it all to be.  But then, he remembered his black eye and the tears that poured from it, he remembered Kaneki licking his blood off his finger and seemingly enjoying it more than he did the sex – and finally, he remembered how heartbroken he looked when he realized what he had done.

“He’s…a Ghoul.  And an Alpha.  How the hell did this happen?  And why did my heat start?”

Normally, heats didn’t come on so suddenly, they were expected and stuck to a schedule and he was always diligent about taking his heat-suppressants if he was even suspicious about a heat starting.  However, Hide did hear a myth that if an Omega met with an especially compatible Alpha their bodies reacted with stronger pheromones and threw the Omega into heat to help spur on mating.  Could this have happened?  It was the only way to explain why he lost control so easily, but it was just a myth!  A story to romanticize the ABO structure!

Suddenly, he could hear multiple footsteps encroaching on his room – from how heavy they sounded, it seemed like people were coming up a stairway.  Hide panicked.

_What should I do? Someone help me!_

The doorknob jiggled as it was turned and Hide did the only thing his fear-struck mind could think of….


	5. Chapter 5

Kaneki’s hand gripped the round door-knob tightly as he shook from the fear that bubbled inside him. Behind him, Yoshimura stood by patiently.

“You will be alright. We gave him heat suppressants and you’ve eaten. I have no doubts in you.”

Kaneki sighed and nodded. He did feel much better after eating, but knowing he had eaten a person still troubled him, even if it was packaged like ground beef and didn't resemble a human at all; but, he had no choice. Yoshimura wouldn’t have allowed him to see Hide unless he had eaten and after what happened between them in the alley there was no way he couldn’t see him now. Slowly, he turned the knob and pushed the door open.

Across from him lay Hide on a dark leather couch underneath the open window. One arm dangled over the edge onto the floor while the other lay limply across his chest. In the sunlight, his pale skin shined and his golden hair glistened, and all throughout the room wafted his floral Omega scent mixing with the smell of coffee, only much more diluted due to the scent-negators throughout the cafe. Kaneki sniffed the air lovingly and stepped into the room, closing the door behind him so he and Hide were alone.

“Hide? Are you awake?” he asked quietly. Hide didn’t move and Kaneki huffed in relief.

“No, of course not. You always were a heavy sleeper.”

He padded across the room and around the wood coffee table until he was by Hide’s side. Looking down on him, he seemed so peaceful; his chest rose and fell with each breath, his eyes fluttered as he dreamed in his sleep, and his lips were parted ever so slightly. He looked gorgeous under the shining light and Kaneki couldn’t help but feel sorrowful knowing he had pulled him into something he didn’t deserve to be in. Not only did they have sex, eternally changing their friendship forever, but now Hide was submerged in the world of Ghouls. It was unfair; he was too kind and perfect to be surrounded by this nightmare.

Woefully, Kaneki kneeled beside Hide, taking his hand from the floor and holding it in his lap. He played with Hide’s fingers, admiring every wrinkle, every callous, and every scrape that decorated them. His heart weighed heavy in his chest and it was during moments like these, when he was alone with his sleeping friend, Kaneki felt most vulnerable.

“You know,” he started “When I was an Omega I never imagined my life would be something special. I hoped of finding a mate all my own, someone who would love everything I had to offer, but…I guess one day I just stopped hoping. And then there was Rize….”

His voice drifted off as the emotional pain from his memories coiled around his heart. His eyes were welling up again and he frowned in annoyance; he was always so prone to his feelings and often cried whenever he felt any sort of overwhelming emotion.

“And now I’m an Alpha. And part-Ghoul. Touka-san says I smell strange to her, not really Ghoul but not really Human either. I’m some weird hybrid I guess, but I still can’t eat human food, only coffee. She says I smell like an Alpha though, she says I smell almost like Rize…I don’t know what that---means.”

Kaneki’s words broke when his voice cracked; the more he spoke, the more upset he became, but talking helped ease the confusion and sorrow he had been feeling all this time. Hide still didn’t move except for the random twitch in his fingers every now and then; as long as Hide was here, Kaneki still spoke.

“I…I don’t know how to be Alpha. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. All I know is how to be Omega. I feel like I’ve woken up in some backwards dream and I’m stumbling through it trying to figure out how to wake up. Hide…”

Gently, Kaneki pressed his forehead to Hide’s chest and inhaled deeply, smiling as he exhaled and ignoring the tears that fell onto his jacket.

“You really do smell good. Have you always smelled like this?” he choked out, taking another moment to inhale Hide’s scent. His fingers interlaced with Hide’s loosely and seeing their hands embracing each other made his heart skip.

Then, like a rising tide, warmth pooled in his lower belly, making his palms sweaty, and images of their joining in the alleyway came rushing forward.

“I can’t believe I did that to you. That we…we actually had sex.”

_You felt so good. Was it really okay?_

Suddenly Kaneki placed his free hand on Hide’s stomach. His fingertips groped at his jacket, wanting to touch the warm skin beneath; instead, they chose a different direction and ever-so-smoothly slid along the slippery fabric of the sports jacket down to Hide’s pants and over his crotch. Turning his head, he rested his cheek on Hide’s chest, watching his hand grope at Hide’s crotch as if it were doing so without his permission. Yet, when he felt something harden under his insistent palm his excitement only grew, urging his actions further until his hand was undoing the button and zipper on Hide’s pants and diving beneath the rough fabric.

“Oh shi...”

Before, when they were in the alley, everything Kaneki did was a blur. He was overcome by hunger and the smell of flesh, shocked by the sight of a dead body, and driven by Hide’s heat. Now, with all of those out of the equation, reality hit him hard. He could feel Hide’s cock pulsing in his hand, he could see every detail, could feel Hide’s chest rise with each breath, and when he pushed and pulled on the taught skin, the drop of slick pre-cum that formed at the tip had him licking his lips.

“Nn…”

Hide shifted in his sleep and Kaneki paused, his head spinning around so he saw Hide’s face; his eyes were still closed, but his chest was moving faster now and when he placed his ear on Hide’s chest, he could hear his heart racing. All these reactions had Kaneki wanting to do more. He turned back to watch his hand pump Hide’s cock, moving faster whenever Hide moaned or twitched. When Kaneki was Omega, he never imagined doing something like this to Hide, or any man for that matter. Now, whenever he was around Hide he felt this deep urge to touch him; the instinct was so strong not even he could defy it even though in the back if his mind he was screaming at how insane the situation was.

“Uhn…ah!” Hide cried out suddenly and Kaneki looked to see his eyes were now open and half-lidded, staring down at Kaneki with his mouth hanging open. Embarrassment and fear overtook Kaneki and he pulled his hand away, shrinking back to escape Hide’s gaze.

“No don’t!”

But then his wrist was grabbed and forcefully pulled back to Hide’s leaking dick and he looked to Hide with wide eyes.

“Don’t stop. Please.”

Swallowing hard, Kaneki nodded and resumed his movements, albeit more hesitantly than before; but, Hide was relaxed into the arm of the couch, his hand remained atop Kaneki’s while he was jerked off, his eyes closed and his panting grew heavy. Kaneki didn’t want to stop, he wanted to make Hide happy and to see him cum by his hand, so he continued on, switching his sights between Hide’s face and his cock.

“Oh god. Kaneki, don’t stop. I’m gonna cum.” Hide whispered breathlessly. Instinctively, Kaneki raised up on his knees and nuzzled into Hide’s neck, inhaling more of his sweet scent while keeping his gaze focused on his swelling erection. His own crotch was aching painfully now, but he had no desire to seek satisfaction for it. Right now, he was entirely focused on Hide and seeing him near his end was enough pleasure for him.

Eventually, Hide’s breathing picked up until he was near hyperventilating, then abruptly halted; his body curled inward, his hand gripped Kaneki’s, and he came in large gobs across his abdomen. As his orgasm ended, the thick white liquid dripped over Kaneki’s knuckle of his thumb and Hide’s breathing returned to normal. It was the most attractive sight Kaneki had ever seen, just hearing Hide moan his name brought him close to cumming in his pants. However, once their excitement settled, they were both dragged down to reality, the one that the voice in his head kept screaming to him about.

"Oh god. Hide. I’m s-sorry. Oh god!”

Panicked, Kaneki fell back against the coffee table, pushing it back and creating a loud screech as it rubbed along the wood floor. He wanted to hide away forever, just disappear into an endless void, but since that wasn’t possible his hands flew up and covered his face – if he couldn’t see anything then he was hidden away, right?

“Kaneki it’s fine! Don’t freak out!”

Hide scrambled from the couch to kneel in front of Kaneki then grabbed his wrists and pulled his hands away from his face, forcing him to look Hide right in the eye.

“I-I-I don’t know what I was thinking! You were sleeping and my hand just moved on its own! I’m so sorry!”

“I said it’s fine! Look, if I didn’t want it I would have stopped you.”

“You were asleep!”

“Actually…” Hide lowered their hands and let Kaneki’s fall from his grasp. His eyes veered away and Kaneki got the unnerving sense he was about to hear something he didn’t want to.

“I wasn’t asleep. I…I was only pretending.”

“Y-you…weren’t asleep? So you heard…everything.”

“I’m sorry.”

Kaneki felt like he should be mad, but upon realizing he had just confessed his thoughts to Hide, he felt oddly at peace instead. Perhaps if it weren’t Hide he would be angry, maybe even feel betrayed, but at this point the pair had shared almost everything together and now found themselves in a situation that was too complicated to fully comprehend. So what did Kaneki care if Hide knew his intimate thoughts and feelings? He had nothing to lose by telling him. He huffed a pathetic laugh and loosely shook his head.

“Don’t be sorry, it’s nothing. In fact…it’s probably better that you know.”

“Then, if we’re being honest with each other, I have to tell you something.”

Before Kaneki could even voice his answer, he felt Hide’s lips on his. He panicked – the memory of his hunger and how close he came to killing Hide made him recoil away, gasping as he did so. Hide didn’t seem offended, rather…he looked relieved.

“I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember.”

He spoke with a steady, even whisper, his breath just ghosting across Kaneki’s face and causing a slight chill to snake up his spine.

_What did he say? He loves me?_

“Hide…what?”

Hide snickered and his cheeks turned pink.

“Yeah, I really said that didn’t I? But I mean we’ve had sex, I think at this point it’d be stupid of me not to tell you.”

Kaneki gulped and in turn, he blushed a fierce red all the way up to his ears. Slowly, Hide’s confession was sinking in and his heart beat faster and faster with every second that passed.

“It’s okay if you don’t feel the same, you’ve got a lot going on right now. I just wanted to tell you. I’ve loved you for so long, I even…well. Do you remember when we were in the alley? And I asked you to bite me?”

Again, heat rushed to Kaneki’s face and he slowly nodded.

“That wasn’t because of my heat. I’ve wanted to be mates with you for so long. I’ve known ever since I presented as Omega. And now that you’re Alpha I thought…maybe it could finally happen. “

Gently, Hide wove his and Kaneki’s fingers together, his eyes dropping to their joining as a small smile broke.

“But,” his smile faded suddenly and he kept his eyes downcast, “that was wrong of me. I shouldn’t have asked you to do something like that, especially with how vulnerable you were. I’m sorry…I was being selfish.”

“S-selfish?”

How could Hide say that? Kaneki took advantage of him, in fact he borderline raped him, and if Touka hadn’t stopped Kaneki he would have probably eaten him, too. And yet here he was, looking guilt-trodden and claiming he was being selfish.

“H-how can you say that? After everything I did. Hide, I…I did something terrible to you.”

This time Kaneki couldn’t stop the tears from falling down his cheeks and he covered his face again in shame. Shortly after, he felt Hide pile himself into his lap until he was straddling him and hug him tightly with his arms around his head so Kaneki’s face was buried against his chest.

“No----, you didn’t do anything wrong. We were both messed up.”

“Hide! I’m a Ghoul now! I…I eat people! Doesn’t that bother you?!”

Why was Hide being so understanding? Why wouldn’t he be angry? He had every right to be! Yet here he was consoling Kaneki, the part-Ghoul that almost devoured him just hours before. It would be so much easier for Hide to hate Kaneki and leave him forever. Kaneki was used to people leaving and turning their backs on him, it’s what he grew up with, he knew how to deal with that and so deep down he wished it would happen so he could deal with the pain and heartache as soon as possible.

“I mean…yeah, it does. But I know you. You won’t hurt anyone that doesn’t deserve it. “

“Hide…” this was infuriating, he didn’t deserve such kindness. “How can you be so okay with everything that’s happening?”

Hide pulled away slightly so he could look Kaneki dead-on.

“I love you, Kaneki. That means no matter what, I’ll stand by you. I don’t think we’ve seen everything that’s come out of your turning and I have a feeling a lot of messed up shit is headed our way. But, I’ll be here with you. I-if you want me, I mean.”

Scoffing, and sniffling, Kaneki embraced Hide, shoving his face into his chest. Hide embraced him back for a short moment and together, they sat silently while Kaneki calmed down from his insistent crying. It wasn’t until his shoulders stopped shaking and his sniffling subsided that Hide pushed him back and lowered down so they were level with each other.

“Kaneki…will you kiss me?”

Suddenly, Kaneki froze and all feeling left his limbs, leaving him numb.

“I’m scared. What if I hurt you?” he uttered, barely audible and Hide answered just as lowly.

“You won’t.”

Hide inched closer, his eyes already half-lidded and waited for Kaneki to close the distance. They had already done so much and Hide already kissed him earlier yet was still breathing, so surely it would be safe to do so again. Slowly, Kaneki pressed closer until…

Hide sighed when they met and instantly, Kaneki’s fears and worries disappeared. Hide’s lips, although chapped, were still soft against his own. His bottom lip was thick and cushioned against Kaneki’s as if it were a luxurious pillow. After a few seconds, Hide’s lips opened and Kaneki followed, their tongues darting out hesitantly to meet each other before entwining.

“Haah.”

Kaneki wanted to hear more of Hide’s sweet sighs, wanted to feel his lips and taste his tongue; yet, the more he sought out, the more desperate he became. He pulled at Hide’s clothing, pushed into him until their kiss was bruising, and lowly moaned in hopes of communicating what he wanted. Hide answered with a tight hug and a soft grind of his hips, raising up on his knees and cradling Kaneki’s head while he deepend their kiss and saliva spilled from their lips. Just when Kaneki was getting riled up, Hide pulled away, leaving him in a daze and aching for more.

“Kaneki,” he suddenly whispered, inching in close to his ear, “will you be my mate?”

That word again: mate. If they mated, they would be bound together forever. There were stories of bounded mates leaving each other, but every single person who did so described an unrelenting lonesom feeling, like someone they cherished suddenly passed and they had no time to grieve. One person even mated with another after the fact and said they still couldn't forget their first mate and eventually tried to seek them out. As an Alpha, Kaneki would be expected to protect Hide and to care for him during his heat. Eventually, he may even become pregnant. Could Kaneki handle that? Was he capable of protecting Hide?

"I don't know if I can."

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"Hide...I won't deny that I feel something for you. But I don't know if that's because I'm a new Alpha or if it's because I truly love you."

Hide frowned, his expression showing that of heartbreak and Kaneki regretted his words the moment he said them, but nonetheless Hide nodded in agreement.

"And...even if I do love you, I don't know if I can be a proper Alpha for you. If...if we're going to be mates, I want to be an Alpha you deserve. So...give me time, okay? Yoshimura said I can work here at the cafe while learning how to be a Ghoul and an Alpha. For now we can be...uh, um--"

Kaneki knew what he wanted to say, but getting the words out was something of a struggle. So, the ever-smiling Hide took his hand once more and helped.

"Together?"

"Y-yeah. Together."

_**KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK** _

The sound startled them both and they whipped their heads around to the door.

"It's time to come downstairs, Kaneki-kun." It was Yoshimura. Was he standing outside the whole time? Kaneki prayed he hadn't.

Clearing their throats, the pair uncoiled from each other and set their clothes right. There was nothing to wipe the cum off Hide's stomach, so he did his best with his shirt and zipped up his jacket to hide any mess before helping Kaneki to straighten the coffee table. Satisfied, they stepped out from the door and headed downstairs to meet with everyone. Instantly, all eyes were on Hide and he suddenly felt very vulnerbale realizing he was the only Human in a room of Ghouls.

"Glad to see he's still alive. Looks like you had some restraint, huh?" Touka spoke suddenly. Her words stung Kaneki deep, but only because they rang true. She was the reason Hide was still alive and for that, he didn't talk back to her.

Well, _he_ didn't anyway.

"Of course he did. Kaneki was vulnerable when you found him. You can't be hard on him forever." Hide spoke up suddenly, defending his Alpha.

"'Vulnerable'? Is that what you call it? Listen, human, you have no fucking idea what you're talking about. He would have torn you to pieces if I wasn't there."

"No he wouldn't. I've known Kaneki longer than any of you, I know he--"

_**DING** _

Suddenly, the small bell above the main door chimed and all fell silent. Touka's eyes went wide and Kaneki looked to see who it was. A tall, slender man had entered, wearing a red suit with a purple undershirt that matched his short and combed purple hair.

 _Just like Rize._ Kaneki thought when he saw the colour.

"Bonjour mon amis." He spoke. Kaneki had no clue what he said except for "hello" that his minimal knowledge of French offered an answer to.

"Tsukiyama...what the hell are you doing here?" Touka asked--she clearly wasn't a fan.

"Touka-kun. No need to be so aggressive." Corrected Yoshimura.

"Thank you, Yoshimura-san. I come only as a friend, of course, and to enjoy some fine coffee. But, I can't help but notice there's a strange odour in the air..."

Looking around, his sights landed on Kaneki and instantly Kaneki tensed up. This man was a Ghoul, that much was clear. Was Hide safe around him? Tsukiyama stepped closer and began sniffing Kaneki; to his side, he could feel Hide tensing up from how close he got to him. Kaneki tried sending him reassuring glances, but it wasn't helping as Hide kept his sights locked on to Tsukiyama.

"You smell awfully familiar, but I know I've never met you before. What's your name?"

"Ken Kaneki." he responded dutifully.

"Ken Kaneki, hmm? Well, I have no doubts we'll get along, Kaneki-kun. And who's this next to you?"

Now his sights were on Hide and Kaneki found himself tensing up just as he did. Tsukiyama took one whiff and backed away. It seems the sensory wipers had no effect on Tsukiyama's sense of smell.

"An Omega? Why would a _filthy_ Omega be here with such a fine group of people?"

Kaneki didn't even have to look at Hide to know what he was feeling. He used to be Omega, he had heard the put-downs and words of disgust before. His hackles raised up and his lips curled, ready to lunge at the stranger, but then an arm got in front of him and he looked to see Yomo blocking him.

"Oh, the Omega dog has a loyal owner, does he?" Hide set his eyes to the floor, submitting himself to whoever this stranger was while Kaneki did everything he could to keep himself from attacking.

"Ah, Tsukiyama-san, perhaps this isn't the best time." Yoshimura interrupted, keeping his smile and friendly demeanor intact.

"Indeed. I shall come back another time, then. Kaneki-kun, we must spend some time together. I would love to get to know you better."

Tsukiyama left just as quickly as he came and the whole cafe settled.

"Who was he?" Kaneki asked as he stepped to Hide's side and squeezed his hand, a gesture that didn't go unnnoticed by those watching.

"That's Shuu Tsukiyama. He's from one of the more elite Alpha Ghoul families in Tokyo. Wealthy, intelligent, and a giant pain in the ass." Touka noted and the whole group seemed to agree in silent nodding.

"Kaneki-kun, it'd be best if you stay away from him. He's not the sort you want to get into trouble with." Yoshimura commented.

"Now then, who wants some coffee?"

Kaneki, along with others, cheered to the idea and set back to their original duties. Kaneki was eager to learn how to make coffee and to finally have a steady job. But before that, he turned to Hide to console him.

"Don't listen to that guy, you have nothing to be ashamed of."

"Tch," Hide snickered, reaching forward to rub Kaneki's head and mess up his hair, "I know that. He just seems like a powerful guy, y'know? I didn't wanna mess with him. I can't believe you almost did though, geeze. He would have killed you."

"Well...if I'm going to be a proper Alpha for you, that's the kind of stuff I need to do right?"

Hide blushed as a big smile spread across his face.

"Listen, I better get going. I'm pretty sure I have an essay due tomorrow that I haven't even started. I'll see you tomorrow, 'kay?"

Kaneki nodded, then gasped when Hide dashed forward to place a small kiss on his cheek before heading out the door. For a moment, Kaneki watched him leave, still trying to comprehend that he and his _best friend_ were now dating, before finally turning his attention to his duties.

Yoshimura handed him an outfit and Kaneki left to change, returning downstairs in no time and donning the apron that covered his front. Touka got to showing him how the cafe operated while Yoshimura and Yomo set to making coffee.

"Are you really going to be mates with him? A human?" Touka asked quietly. Her tone didn't sound offensive but rather curious.

"If what I'm feeling is love then...yeah, I think so. No one knows me better than he does. But I need to figure myself out and work on being a better mate for him."

"Well, be careful. Not many people favour a Ghoul-Human partnership. You're putting him in a lot of danger."

"Wow, that sounds oddly supportive of you. You aren't sick, are you?"

"Shut up." She gently nudged him with her shoulders and Kaneki laughed quietly, then the pair got to work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit, a new chapter.  
> Thanks to all of you for sticking with me <3


	6. Chapter 6

Working at the cafe proved to be almost therapeutic for Kaneki. He still went to school to adhere to his studies then spent his afternoons working at the cafe. At night, he trained to fight with Touka and Yomo, and eventually he learned about his Kagune. It took time to learn how to harness his Kagune, but with his previous knowledge of martial arts from the books he read and his own natural determination, he was proving more and more efficient each night.

Eventually, he met other Ghouls that were like him; meaning, they didn't want to kill Humans to survive. He met a young girl, Hinami, and her mother. They were both so gentle and kind, both with light brown hair and warm eyes, it was hard to imagine them as Ghouls. Hinami was only thirteen, but her soft-spoken nature made her seem so much younger. Even more surprising, Kaneki learned she had only a gradeschool level of reading since she was unable to attend school. Of course, that was unacceptable to Kaneki and he took it upon himself to teach her more difficult vocabulary. Often times, Hide stopped by the cafe to visit, and one day while Kaneki was reading to Hinami, Hide visted with an extra special gift.

"Hey Kaneki," Hide said cheerfully upon entering the upstairs room.

"Hide. Good to see you. This is Hinami-chan. Hinami, this is Hide, my uh...best friend."

Hide smiled thoughtfully. He wasn't offended by Kaneki's lackluster introduction knowing full-well he was still adjusting to the idea of them being lovers; yet, as he moved closer to Kaneki, it was hard to resist grabbing his hand and kissing him on the cheek.

"How was school? I only had a morning class today so I've been here for most of it." Kaneki explained.

"I wouldn't know. I was feeling kind of sick this morning so I skipped."

"Oh, are you still feeling sick?" Kaneki stood up from the couch then and touched the back of his hand to Hide's forehead -- no fever.

"Yes mom, I'm fine." Hide swatted at Kaneki's hand and Kaneki scoffed; he was only trying to care for him. Even if he wasn't sick now, Hide seemed...anxious, like there was something nagging at him.

"Did something happen? You seem...off."

"Uh."

Hide reached back and rubbed the back of his head, meaning something was on his mind.

"Nothing happened, but um..." He looked to Hinami. "Hinami-chan, do you mind giving us some privacy? I have to talk to Kaneki about something."

Hinami nodded politely and stood up, smoothing out the wrinkles in her dress before leaving the room. Hide then grabbed Kaneki's hand and guided him to sit on the same old leather couch he had confessed to him on just days before.

"So, uh, I wanted to talk about the whole 'mate' thing." Hide started. Kaneki simply nodded and gave Hide his full attention.

"I know you're not ready yet, and that's ok. We've got all the time in the world so don't stress. In the meantime though, um, I wanted to show you that I'm fully committed to becoming your mate so..."

Releasing Kaneki's hand, Hide unzipped his jacket, revealing the black leather collar around his neck. It was simple, not decorated with jewels or diamonds like some Omegas preferred and Kaneki's eyes went wide.

"A collar? But you hate wearing them!"

"I know, I know. It's itchy and annoying and makes me feel like there's something in my throat everytime I swallow. But when I wear it I don't feel like property, which was really why I hated it so much. Wearing this, knowing one day you'll be my Alpha, it almost feels like...a promise. No one else can mate with me."

"Hide..."

Kaneki was overjoyed, leaving him speechless. Even though Hide had thrown his own collar out years ago, the fact he went out and bought a new one as a way of saving himself for when they were together made him feel absolutely honoured and grateful; he wondered if there was someway he could mirror that same commitment.

"Anyway, I better get going to work. I just wanted to stop by and show you. Maybe you can come over later?"

Hide leaned over and gently pushed aside Kaneki's hair with his thumb, kissing the bare spot behind his ear and making Kaneki blush.

"Oh yeah? And why should I come over?" Kaneki teased.

"Because I want you to..." Hide whispered, "And...I really need help with my essay."

"Ugh, Hide!" Kaneki scoffed.

Hide's hand dropped to the couch and his forehead fell onto Kaneki's shoulder.

"Please! I'm hopeless! It's due on Monday! I'm supposed to write about the influence of old languages on modern English and I only have half a page written!"

"Didn't you just finish an essay?"

"Sort of...I talked my professor into giving me an extension. This is my last chance! Please Kaneki!"

Kaneki sighed hopelessly; Hide was right though, he really was useless when it came to essays, having edited more than half of them himself and having to rewrite the rest. He agreed to help and Hide just about yelped in joy before placing a quick kiss on his lips; no matter how many times Hide did that, it still ruffled up the butterflies in Kaneki's stomach and left him gushing like a schoolgirl. Hide then hurried off to work, leaving his jacket undone and fully baring his new collar, and Kaneki got back to learning the ancient art of drip brewed coffee.

* * *

Hide waited hours for Kaneki and he hadn't heard anything from him; even when he finished work at eight and texted Kaneki immediately after, he got no response when he was home at nine. Even calling him proved fruitless. He left a message and thought about leaving another, but since he had been texting him non-stop for a couple hours and already called him twice, he figured his desperation was obvious enough.

_Just calm down. Maybe he's just caught up in training. He'll come when he feels like it._

He told himself that over and over, but no matter how many times he chanted it to himself his anxiety and worry persisted. Finally, at half past midnight, he perked up to the sound of his doorknob jiggling and sure enough, Kaneki stepped through his doorway.

"Kaneki!"

Hide just about jumped from his bed over to where Kaneki stood, but one look at his face told him something was wrong. His eyes were red and puffy, signs that he was crying, and he could see the stains on his pale cheeks and alongside those stains...were small splashes of blood.

"Kaneki...what happened? Are you okay?"

Kaneki's lip trembled as he inhaled a shaky breath, his shoulders dropping when he sobbed and he reached for Hide who clamboured into his tight embrace.

"Hinami...I was coming here and she asked for help..."

Kaneki hugged him tighter, his hands squeezing Hide's shirt tighter with each word he spoke.

"Her mom...the Doves. I tried to help them! I was too weak! I couldn't do anything! I just stood there and watched! They slaughtered her, Hide! Her mom's..."

"Oh god." Hide muttered and he squeezed Kaneki tightly, helping him gently fall to the ground when his knees collapsed.

"She's dead, Hide. They killed her just for being a Ghoul! She was...the kindest woman I ever met. And Hinami...she saved me. I was completely--fucking useless--against---the Doves!"

The more Kaneki spoke, the more upset he became until he could no longer string together a full sentence. His whole body shook with each sob and his tears soaked through Hide's shirt, but Hide didn't care. He saw the stains of red in Kaneki's sweater and he could only imagine the horror Kaneki witnessed and how helpless he felt to preventing it.

"Where's Hinami now? Is she okay?"

Kaneki nodded against Hide's shoulder.

"She's at--Anteiku--with--"

"Okay, shhh. Take some deep breaths."

Kaneki tried, but each inhale was interrupted by hiccups and another loud sob. With Hide's coaching, he persisted until finally he was calm enough to speak and his cries quieted to mere sniffles.

"You must be exhausted."

"No, not really. Ghouls don't really sleep. It's weird -- not sleeping -- I have all this time and nothing to fill it with..."

"Well...stay here tonight, 'kay? You're a wreck. Even if you can't sleep, you need to destress before you can think straight."

With a sniffle, Kaneki nodded. Hide pushed himself up from the ground, helped Kaneki up, then pulled him along to the bed. Slowly, Kaneki stripped himself of his pants and sweater, choosing to leave his socks and T-shirt on while Hide stayed in his worn out T-shirt and running shorts. After a quick shower to rid himself of the blood stains, they settled in the bed, with Hide pushed against the wall spooning Kaneki and his laptop sitting on the bed in front of them so they could watch a movie. As they scrolled through his collection of pirated movies and shows, they realized everything Hide had was either horror or some sort of monster-figthing movie, none of which were appropriate for Kaneki's mood. They switched to Webflicks, an online streaming app, and one movie caught Kaneki's eye, a movie titled "Hope".

"I wanna watch that."

Looking at the synopsis, Hide wondered if Kaneki already knew of the movie -- it sounded like it was right up his alley.

"Are you sure? It's going to be sad."

"I know...I want to watch it."

"Okay..."

Hesitantly, Hide started the movie and wrapped his arm loosely around Kaneki's torso, finding his hand and gently grasping it. Slowly, like dye seeping into a river, his Alpha scent began filling the air and put Hide at ease, making his eyelids heavy and his heart beat slow. He hoped his own scent was having the same effect, and from the way Kaneki seemed to sink into him and lose himself in the movie told Hide it was.  Evidently, Hide fell fast asleep only ten minutes in.

* * *

Hours later, he woke to something -- or rather someone -- softly stroking his stomach and rubbing against his leg. Hide groaned as he woke, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and looking down to see Kaneki panting on his chest while grinding his hardness against his thigh.

"Kaneki...what are you doing?" he asked lazily.

"I'm sorry. I'm...I'm really horny right now."

"What? What time is it?" Hide searched around for his phone, but couldn't find it. As he looked, Kaneki's scent was thick in the air like smoke, hitting him hard and making him light-headed.

"I don't know. Three, I think?"

"In the morning?! Aw Kaneki, can't this wait until later? I'm exhausted, man."

"I can't wait, I need you _now_."

"Is this really a good idea? After what happened with--"

"I know! I don't want to think okay? I've been thinking of it all night and then this happened and...fuck, can we just do this? Please Hide..."

Kaneki's voice dropped to a dangerously low whisper and he inched up to kiss Hide on his neck. This early in the morning, Hide was sensitive to every little touch, so he was easily convinced and found his body ready and willing. Kaneki piled onto him, eagerly rubbing himself against Hide's growing erection, causing them both to gasp and moan with each hard rub. Hide's hands went everywhere they could reach: up Kaneki's shirt, squeezing his rear, feeling up his waist, combing through his hair; he simply couldn't get enough of him, and neither could Kaneki.

"God, Hide! I'm...I feel so hot. I think...I think I'm in heat."

"But you're Alpha now?"

"I know! I don't get it, but I can't stop myself. Touch me more! I need it so bad!"

Neither of them understood whatwas going on; it was common for Alphas to go into "rut", similar to an Omega's heat but driven by the instinct to mate. Alphas in rut were aggressive, mindless, and dominant; Kaneki was being more submissive and pleading, definitely showing signs of heat. Whatever it was, Hide wasn't going to complain since he loved everything involved with sex and if Kaneki needed a good fuck at three in the morning, he wasn't going to tell him 'no'. Quickly, he lowered his pants just enough to expose himself, as did Kaneki and the two began rubbing against each other hotly; already, Kaneki was leaking enough to help smooth the friction between them. As they rubbed, they kissed. Kaneki was still getting used to the idea of being intimate with his best friend, so his kisses were clumsy and messy, but Hide didn't mind. Slowly, Hide guided him, purposely slowing down his movements so Kaneki could follow and eventually Kaneki caught on, but he had no patience for slow and steady love-making.

"Hide...please."

"You're so whiny when you're horny." Hide mocked as he pushed Kaneki up so he was kneeling over his lap.

"Shut up, I've never been this horny before. It's so bad!"

"If it really is that bad, then you should take these."

Hide grunted as he reached over his bed and into his pack, pulling out the open blister-pack of small white pills. He popped one out and pushed it to Kaneki's lips.

"Take it, your heat will go away."

Kaneki happily opened up and let the pill sit under his tongue where it instantly melted away. The effects weren't immediate, but knowing his heat would be gone soon made him feel thankful. Until then, they had time to fool around. With Kaneki kneeling in front of Hide who was now sitting up, Hide pulled down his briefs and eyed his wet cock; he had dreamed of giving Kaneki head for years now, even masturbated to thoughts of it pushing down his throat and filling it with cum. Now, it was finally happening and he could barely stop the drool from wetting his lips. He took the head into his mouth and savoured the salty taste of Kaneki's pre-cum, then dipped down halfway the shaft before coming up and popping off with a hard suck.

"Nnngh...yes. Just like that. Don't stop."

Kaneki lovingly stroked Hide's hair and pushed him towards his cock; as Hide opened his mouth and took his hard shaft back in, Kaneki shivered and groaned, letting his hips rock forward gently without making Hide gag. The pair easily had a steady rhythm going, with Hide bobbing his head in time with Kaneki's hips, and it wasn't long before Hide felt himself feeling rather needy as well. He positioned himself so he was lying on the bed, his head against the wall and Kaneki hovering over him so he could still pump into his mouth; this way, Hide was able to reach his entrance and with a little lube, he fingered himself hurriedly.

"H-Hide...nggh! I'm---ah!"

Unexpectedly, Kaneki's hips stuttered and he came. Hide just barely caught it since he was in the middle of taking a recovery breath, but managed to swallow most of it down eagerly with only a small dribble hitting his chin.

"S-sorry. I've never, uh...been sucked off before."

"Mmm~ it's okay, I don't mind. You taste really good, babe."

"Hide!" Kaneki exclaimed as Hide went in for one last lick of his sensitive head, smiling as he did so. Afterwards, Kaneki joined Hide in lying on the bed, gently positioning himself ontop and kissing the crook of his neck.

"I'm pretty much ready...you wanna fuck me?"

The harsh curse made Kaneki shiver and he nodded while biting his lip. They aleady had sex before, but that time Kaneki's mind was lost and he had no control over himself; this time, he could feel everything, could devulge himself in the feel and scent of Hide -- this time, it was much more real. Hide nudged Kaneki off him and reached into his bedside table for a condom, pulling it out and expertly ripping the packaging open; he helped Kaneki with finding the right side and sliding it on, making sure there was enough room at the tip while securing it at the base. In turn, Kaneki helped with placing a pillow underneath Hide's hips to ease the pain of penetration and keep him comfortable. As Kaneki positioned himself at his entrance, with Hide's legs closed together and hooked over his shoulder, Hide stroked his fingertips along Kaneki's flat, smooth stomach.

"Are you sure this position is okay?" Kaneki asked.

"Yeah. It'll be tight, but it's gonna feel so good."

"Okay...here I go."

Ever so slowly, Kaneki began pushing inside, gasping in surprise at the sudden hot tightness that sucked him in. Hide tensed and gripped at the bedsheets, his back arching and voice breaking out in pained grunts.

"A-are you okay?"

"M-more lube. Fuck!"

Panicked, Kaneki stopped and searched for the lube among the loose bedding; once he found it, he poured a generous amount over his cock, pulling out slightly to smooth it over before pushing back in. Hide released a shaky breath and seemed to relax, running his fingers through his sweat-soaked hair and collapsing against the mattress once Kaneki was fully inside him.

"God...your dick feels so good inside."

"You're...hot. So hot. I feel like I'm gonna melt. Can I move?"

"Yeah. Do it."

With a moan, Kaneki pulled back, and then forth. Hide's smooth insides massaged Kaneki as he slid and with each, slow drag the heat inside him grew hotter; his toes tingled with a dull electric feeling and his thighs twitched with each jolt that shot forth from his groin. His memories of sex were rash and dizzying, but this -- this was so much more exciting, even for their slow pace, and it helped Kaneki temporarily forget all the horrible things he had seen the night before. Hide whined as he was slowly fucked, his hands depserately grabbing anything within reach, and whenever he mewled Kaneki's name, Kaneki felt the violent urge to mess him up and make him scream.

"Faster."

That one command made Kaneki lose all sense of control; he let go of Hide's legs, letting them spread open so he could dive down and pin Hide's wrist on the bed while his other hand grasped his hip. He picked up a non-stop rhythm of jerking forward and sliding back, jerking forward, sliding back. Hide cried out, saying something new each time until he was too numb to say anything at all; when their eyes met, Hide focused on his left eye, smiling and clenching his ass around Kaneki's hard cock. He knew his eye was showing, that one blazing sign of his impurity and he wondered if it excited Hide.

Just as Kaneki's power-driven ecstasy was reaching its peak, he was once again overcome with an stifling heat, to the point where he couldn't even breathe without breaking a sweat. His orgasm came on suddenly and he all but fell against Hide, grinding his dick into him as he came and wishing so badly he wasn't wearing a condom so he could feel his lover skin-to-skin.

"Fuh---Hide...I need..."

"Shit, again?"

Kaneki nodded against his chest and Hide sighed. He knew he was being a nuisance at this point, but until the medicine kicked in there was nothing left for them to do but screw around.

"Okay, but put on a new condom."

Kaneki pulled out and discarded the old condom while Hide dug through his bedside table for a new one; it was then Hide realized the worst.

"Fuck! I'm out!"

Annoyed, Hide got up from the bed and dressed himself in his running shorts -- the same thing he wore to bed. Meanwhile, Kaneki grunted in frustration and fell onto the bed, rubbing his aching cock and rolling his hips as if displaying himself for Hide.

"I'm gonna head down to the corner store and get more. Stay here, got it?"

"Hide -- your collar."

"So what? I'm just going to the store, I won't even be five minutes."

"Please," Kaneki begged, "You reek of sex. Just wear it."

"Tch."

Just to make a show of it, Hide grabbed the collar and dangled it between his fingers for Kaneki before putting it on and locking it in place, then left.

Five minutes. That's all he had to wait, but as time passed it felt like an eternity. Then, five minutes turned into ten, then fifteen, and then twenty. Kaneki couldn't wait and masturbated the last of his heat away and when a whole thirty-five minutes had passed, his heat had finally subsided, but where was Hide? At first, he thought the walk had taken longer than expected, or maybe the store was exceptionally busy at...four in the morning...

Something was wrong. Kaneki quickly refreshed himself with a splash of cold water on his face before dressing and heading out the door. The air was cold and the wind blasted in his face when he opened the door, making his teeth chatter. Once he was off campus, the convenience store was in plain sight down the street, its neon lights acting like a beacon to hungry, study-driven souls and he headed straight for it; inside, he noticed right away how empty the store was -- there was no way Hide could have taken any longer than ten minutes here.

"Excuse me, ma'am, did a young man with longish dirty blond hair come in here?"

The older, tired store clerk looked up from her crossword book and shook her head.

"Nope. No one's been in here for a couple hours now."

A foreboding feeling overcame Kaneki, making his knees weak and bile pool in his throat. He rushed back outside and started searching for any sign of Hide, backtracking the path to his dorm room; as he searched high and low, a metallic scent distracted him and he looked to see a small splatter of red on the brick wall of the campus gate. One whiff told Kaneki what it was -- and who it belonged to.

"Hide...what the hell happened to you?"

Knowing Hide hadn't even reached the store meant that whatever happened to him happened within minutes of him leaving the dorm. Was someone watching them and waiting for Hide to be alone and vulnerable? Or was it just a random attack? Each question only brought on more, and various plots played through Kaneki's mind, none of them good with Hide's fate growing worse in each one.

* * *

It was already quarter past seven when everyone was gathered at Anteiku. Fueled by fear, it was the only place Kaneki could think of for help and thanks to Yoshimura, it was easy enough gathering everyone. Hinami was still there and her eyes lit up when she saw Kaneki, calling out "Big brother!!" and running to hug him. The memories of the night before came back and Kaneki hugged her tight; even though they just met, he really did feel like an older brother to her. Kaneki explained everything he knew -- minus the crazed sex part, choosing instead to say Hide left for snacks -- and the crew of Ghouls were hard on the case.

"There were no other clues? Just some of his blood?" Yomo asked.

"He's dead. Probably taken by a Ghoul." Touka commented, earning a scowl from Kaneki.

"We would have found a body." Yomo replied.

"It could be the CCG. They have been known to take Humans who may be tied to Ghouls." Yoshimura added.

"But why the blood?" Kaneki asked, sipping on his coffee as his only comfort.

"Maybe he put up a fight? Or he was knocked out." Touka answered.

"Whatever happened, we need to find him. He's an Omega and Kaneki's partner. If this is an attack against him, it's an attack against us."

The group nodded in agreement and Kaneki was grateful he had friends like those at Anteiku in his life. Their silence was suddenly broken by the chime at the door; a tall man with glasses and light brown hair that flipped out at his jaw entered.

"Nishiki-kun, good to see you."

"Not so good actually. I need your help, Yoshimura. It's -- who's this?" Nishiki looked to Kaneki who awkwardly sipped his coffee.

"This is Kaneki-kun. You might have heard of him, he's the half-Ghoul half-Human hybrid people have been talking about."

"No shit? He looks like a whimp compared to the rumours."

Kaneki sighed -- he didn't have nearly enough coffee to get through this conversation.

"Anyway, you were saying?"

"It's Kimi. She's gone. I think someone took her."

"Who's Kimi?" Kaneki asked cautiously.

"My girlfriend." Nishiki spat back.

"Nishiki-kun...when did she go missing?"

"Sometime last night. I was out hunting and when I got back home she was gone. I've searched everywhere for her!"

Collectively, the group tensed and looked to each other. If Kaneki was a betting man, he would guess Kimi was an Omega like Hide, maybe even Human.

"What's the matter? You're all acting like you've got something to hide."

"Kimi isn't the only one." Touka spoke up, "Kaneki's boyfriend got taken, too. A human. And an Omega, just like Kimi."

Nishiki's nostrils flared and for a moment, Kaneki felt a sense of sympathy eminating from him when their eyes met.

"Something's going on." Yomo muttered.

"Now who do we know has an utter hatred for Omegas and Humans alike?" Touka asked and without even thinking, everyone came to the same conclusion as Kaneki.

"Tsukiyama Shuu."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!! This chapter is pretty straight-forward and I can't wait to write the next one!! A little about the movie that was mentioned, "Hope", it's an actual movie from Korea and it's AMAZING. I cannot stop talking about this movie and I just felt the need to throw it in because I feel like Kaneki is one of those people who, when they're sad, watches sad movies or read sad books to help cope with what he's going through. And "Hope" is definitely a movie that will make you ugly cry at least 5 times.  
> If you like dramas (read up on it before you watch it, it deals with some heavy stuff) and heartfelt movies, you should totally check it out. 
> 
> ANYWAY ENJOY THE CHAPTER BYEEEE


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up this chapter has graphic depictions of rape.  
> Also the story is gonna get pretty sad for a bit, so hang in there!   
> Thanks to everyone who's stuck with me, I have been SO inspired to write lately so I wrote this chapter over just a couple days! I hope to update more often. Fingers crossed!

Hide's knees ached from being on the cold, hard, rocky ground so long. He hadn't a clue where he was, only that he wasn't alone from the sounds of shallow breathing from other people to his sides. The black cloth bag over his head made sight impossible except for small dots of light that poked through the bag, but he couldn't tell where or what they came from.

Hours go when he left for the store, he immediately sensed another presence and even though there was a strong wind, he could still smell the overbearing scent of an Alpha. His gut told him to turn around, but he was already so close to the store, to safety, and convinced himself he just needed to hurry.

Then there was the sharp bite of someone's fist against his cheek, the taste of blood in his mouth, and he was out. He couldn't even recall where the hit came from or if he even heard anyone behind him.

Now he was here, wherever 'here' was. He switched to sitting cross-legged on the floor -- somewhat of a difficult task since his hands where tied behind him, but manageable. The person to his left chose to do the same.

"Hey, what's your name?" he decided to ask them. He kept his voice down knowing full well there was someone separate from his group that was watching over them. He couldn't see, but he smelled a subtle Alpha scent.

"Huh? Mine? I'm Kimi." The girl replied.

"I'm Hide. Do you know where we are?"

"No. I was at home when someone broke in and took me. I'm scared. Is that stupid to say?"

Hide shook his head, forgetting Kimi couldn't see. "Not stupid at all. I'm scared, too."

He could hear her sigh in relief and he smiled; even though they were somewhere unknown and their fates were uncertain, talking to someone made him feel at ease. 

"I-I'm Tadashi." A boy said. He sounded like he was on the other end of their group.

"I'm Aiko..." another girl spoke.

"And I'm fucking sick of all of you. What do you think this is? Some afterschool club? Shut up already!" This boy sounded older, harsher, and his scolding startled even Hide.

"Hey, calm down. You're scaring people." Hide tried to say.

"Fuck you! I just want to know who the hell took us so I can kick their ass."

Then, a metal door screeched in front of him, followed by footsteps. Someone was coming. In a flash, Hide's world was open to him as the dark cloth bag was removed, the dull light blinding him until he blinked it away. Ahead, there were two figures standing before the group; one was tall and bulky like a linebacker, his muscles accentuated by the dusty light in the hallway. He was most likely the one that kept guard at the door. The other...

"Tsukiyama-san?" Hide called, making the others in the group look to him.

"Bonjour dearest _dog_. Found yourself in quite a predicament, haven't you?"

Hide had a million and one questions for him, but he chose to keep quiet. He was a human in a Ghoul world, it would be easy for Tsukiyama to kill him if that's what he wanted. Now wasn't the time to act out, but the others didn't feel that way.

"Who the hell are you? Where are we? What the fuck did you do with my girlfriend?" The boy on his right yelled, standing on his knees and leaning toward Tsukiyama menacingly. 

"Your mate is fine." Tsukiyama replied calmly and it was then Hide noticed the faint bite mark on the loud boy's neck. "You should be more worried about yourself."

Tsukiyama stepped to the side, making his way around the group. His fingertips grazed along the shoulders of his charges, making each one shiver and recoil. 

"You are nothing but a commodity; something to be sold and treated as such. In case you haven't noticed, you're all...Omegas." Tsukiyama said the last word like it left a bad taste in his mouth.

"I would prefer to kill you here and now, rid you all from this world. But some people actually want you around. I am entertaining many guests tonight, local and foreign, and many are looking for a young, Japanese Omega to add to their collection. That's where you come in."

"Fuck that!" The young man yelled. His hair was buzzed, meaning there was nothing to grab, so instead Tsukiyama gripped the crown of his head with his fingertips; an impossible feat by human standards, but for a Ghoul? He could crush him easily, like a grape, and now the man realized exactly how much danger he was in. Still he fought, and Tsukiyama spoke over him.

"Let me go!"

"You will all be groomed and made presentable."

"Please!"

"Upstairs, my guests are being entertained. You will serve them, advertise yourself--"

"I can't leave her! She's my mate!"

"You will be auctioned off to the highest bidder, sold, and sent away. You will never return."

"No! Please! Just let me go! Take the rest of them. I don't care! Just please let me go!"

The man was crying now; snot dribbled from his nose while tears streamed by down his cheeks like a river. By now, most of the group had inched away from him, making sure it was clear they weren't standing by him; however, Hide remained in place. Finally, Tsukiyama let him go, pushing him away by his head, but he didn't move. 

"Don't worry, you won't be sold." Tsukiyama spoke only to the young man now who craned his body around to peer up at him.

"Really?"

"Really. You're far too reckless."

Suddenly, something cold and wet streaked across Hide's face, hitting his lips and nose and above his eyes. There was a thud. It all happened so fast, Hide couldn't even process it. Looking to the ground, he saw the young man, only he was different -- half of his face was missing, leaving only his lower jaw attached to the rest of his body.

_Blood. There's blood on my face._

Screaming wracked his ears. He couldn't discern whether it was a boy or a girl, or even if it came from himself. Maybe it did. All he could hear was screaming and crying while the lower jaw of someone that was talking just seconds before stared at him. He was expecting it talk to him like it was some cartoon character. It would get up and start looking around for the rest of its head, then pop it on and everything would be okay.

Only it didn't. It remained there on the ground, but he kept watching.

"Now then." Tsukiyama was talking again. "Don't think for a moment any of you are _needed_. You're the ones I found for tonight. There's millions more of you. If I end up slaughtering you all tonight, I can find more."

He stepped over the body -- no longer a person now -- dropping the other half of the head into the pool of blood that had formed around the jaw, causing a cacophony of sound as it splashed.

_Oh. There it is._

"Stay put mon petit chiens, I'll be back for you soon."

The harsh sound of the bars closing sealed their fate. The screaming had dulled to loud sobs and now a pair of hazel eyes stared at Hide along with the disconnected jaw, as if expecting something of him. He could see the blood seeping towards him. He knew he should move away, save his clothes from being dirtied as if it mattered somehow, but he couldn't bring himself to move. His mind was still caught in a state of panic; he knew the reality of what transpired would hit him sooner or later, but for now he felt almost...peaceful, like he was too numb to experience anything that was happening. He couldn't feel. Was it warm or cold? Was he wet? Did he urinate himself? He could tell where his limbs were but that was all, everything else passed over him like a breeze over the shore. He wished he could stay in this numbing peace for eternity.

* * *

Kaneki and the group had to wait until nightfall before enacting their plan, though he begged that they go sooner.

"We don't know what Tsukiyama is planning for them. Or us. He knows we're coming. If we screw this up, we could lose Kimi and Hide for good. Do you understand?"

Touka was stern when she spoke and Kaneki got the message loud and clear. Word was going around Tsukiyama was holding a big event tonight at his restaurant and there was no doubt Hide was there. What exactly he was planning, no one knew, but they were ready for a fight. After their meeting, Touka took Kaneki to a famous Ghoul who went by the name Uta -- he was the one who created all the masks that every Ghoul wore to keep their identity safe from the CCG. It was expected Doves may be at the event tonight knowing full well there were Ghouls who tipped off Doves in exchange for safety from the CCG, so Kaneki needed a mask if he were to fight.

Later that night, Uta came to the shop and gifted Kaneki with his mask. It was leather and creaked under the strain of him bending and twisting it to break it in. The mouth featured a zipper that he could open and close freely, and an eyepatch that covered his Human eye. His stomach twisted. His Ghoul eye would be exposed; there was no hiding with this on.

"Try it on." Uta urged, his black eyes staring at him curiously. Kaneki gulped.

"M-my eye. What if it turns? People will see."

Uta remained expressionless. "Kaneki-kun, you will be amongst Ghouls. They'll know you anyway."

"But the Doves, they'll--"

"Idiot, that's what the mask is for." Nishiki spoke up now. "Everyone who wears a mask puts themselves at risk. Mine doesn't even show my eyes, but as soon as the Doves see it? They know. You're a Ghoul. Get the fuck over it already. Are you going to let Hide die just because people are going to see your eye?"

Kaneki was stunned, but Nishiki, who he learned was Hide's senpai at college, was right. He was in a cafe with Ghouls. He surived off Humans and coffee. He was a Ghoul, even if only half, yet Hide still loved him, even wore a collar for him. It was Kaneki's turn to show his commitment.

Opening the straps of the mask and flipping it over, he slowly fit the mask to his face, reaching back to secure the straps. When it was on, he took a deep breath; the smell of leather filled his nostrils. It was sharp and musky, a scent he didn't normally enjoy and now it would remind him of this mask, of what it meant whenever he donned it. He accepted the scent into his lungs, releasing it when they were painfully full, then opened his eyes to face Uta.

"I'm ready."

\-----

When nightfall finally came, the group was quiet. They stood on a rooftop across the way from the famed Ghoul Restaurant, a place where high-class members went to be entertained and fed. Yomo compared it to the Collosseum of Rome -- humans were unknowingly brought in by Ghouls and forced to fight for their lives against a selected competitor, or a 'Scrapper' as they were known. Almost all were slaughtered, their fate to be served as food to the Ghouls watching on. Kaneki's stomach churned at the thought of Hide fighting for his life in front of a crowd of jeering, blood-drunk Ghouls. He tightened his mask, making sure it wasn't going to slip out of place.

"If Hide and Kimi are being used in the fights, they'll be kept underground, away from wandering guests." Yomo explained.

"There's a backdoor we can enter with only a couple guards. Easy enough to get in." Touka said.

"What if they're not where we expect them?" Kaneki asked.

"Then we'll find someone who knows. Look, the doors opened." Touka pointed to the front doors where a group of Ghouls were beginning to pile in.  
Kaneki, Touka, Yomo, and Nishiki all hurried across the rooftops,jumping from one to the other easily until they made it to the restaurant before heading straight for the back door.

* * *

The roar of the crowd was deafening and shook Hide down to his core. He stood in the middle of of the walkway between multiple tables, all full with high-class Ghouls who watched the fights in the center ring hungrily. He wore nothing but sleek black dress pants and a bow tie over his collar, showing off his torso -- the girls, who he saw scattered amongst the tables on the other side, were fitted with simple one-piece outfits, high heels, and small ties around their necks. The Ghouls cheered as a victim tripped over her own feet while running from the Scrapper.

"Looks like someone is having trouble and our Scrapper Juuzou is hot on her heels!" The announcer called.

The scrapper, a human who was deathly pale with starlight hair, jumped at the victim, bringing their enormous scythe down on her to split her in half. Hide looked away -- he saw enough blood for one night. 

"Qué cosa tan dulce. No quieres ver a tu amigo muerto, hm?" A Ghoul suddenly spoke and Hide looked to the table at his right. A young woman wearing a sultry red dress with a plunging neckline eyed him. Her lipstick matched her dress and was stark against her dark skin and bristling white teeth.

Hide looked puzzled, was she talking to him?

"Eres tan linda~. Lástima que no pueda comerte." Her warm brown eyes were inviting; he could see how tempting it would be to follow her home. They looked to the ring, lighting up like a flame before returning to Hide.

"I-I'm sorry, I don't understand." He recognized she was speaking Spanish, but had no clue what she was saying. His heart fluttered with panic.

"Señor!" She called, raising her hand in the air and calling attention to one of the Ghouls that stood nearby. He was dressed sharply like the other, meant to tend to any requests the guests had. 

The lady in red whispered in his ear and he seemed to understand fully. Suddenly, he grabbed Hide's arm and directed him down the walkway to a door in the back.

"What's happening? Where are you taking me?"

"Lady Valezquez is interested in purchasing you, but first she wants to test you out." He explained curtly.

"What does that mean? Will she kill me?"

He seemed amused and smiled. "No. She isn't allowed to do such a thing since you aren't hers. Yet."

They turned here and there, so many times Hide just about lost track of where the main area was, but then they came to a secluded hallway lined with doors on either side. He was guided into one of the rooms; it was mostly empty except for a large bed in the center, a vanity, and an armoire in the corner. Like a spark on dry grass, Hide understood what was going to happen.

"No, no. Please don't!" He begged.

"Relax. Just enjoy it. She'll be here soon." He was thrown inside and the doors closed behind him abruptly. 

_This isn't happening. It can't be. Oh god, please help me! Kaneki! Where are you?!_

He searched the room frantically for an exit. No vents big enough to crawl through, no secret doors, and when he tried the main door it was locked, of course, but at least he could cross it off as an exit. He could feel his sweat dripping down his neck as his panic flourished within him; when he heard the door unlock after only minutes of silence, he looked to the armoire and thought for a second about hiding inside.

_Idiot. She'll sniff you out no problem._

The doors opened and Hide turned to face the tall, curvy woman -- she had the perfect hourglass shape even with her narrow hips and small breasts, and her chocolate brown hair was styled to one side as it cascaded down her back in gentle waves. Her presence alone demanded the attention of others in the room and Hide admitted that as terrified as he was, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her knowing smile made him feel small and when she stepped towards him in her matte black heels, he inched backwards until he hit the bed.

"No te asustes." She cooed, bringing her delicate fingers to Hide's chin and tilting his face upwards. "No te haré daño."

He swallowed hard, not knowing what to say, and the woman giggled amusedly. Then, she hiked up her dress in the front and straddled his hips; the gesture brought Hide back to Earth and he remembered why he was brought here, why the doorman locked them both inside and why she was looking at him with half-lidded eyes and a gleaming smile. Her intentions were fully made clear when her arms hooked behind his neck and she leaned in, pressing her lips to Hide's and leaving a bright red stain.

"Wait, ma'am, please. I-I can't do this. I'm..." he tried to explain, wondering if she understood Japanese at all.

"No puedes hacer qué? Mierda?"

She leaned past his face and a warm wetness licked at Hide's earlobe. His breath hitched. Normally he would enjoy his ears being played with, but this was a woman, not Kaneki and her touch only made his skin crawl at the very spot as if trying to run from her.

"Please...don't."

The next instant he found himself flat on the bed with the woman hovering over him and both her hands gripping his shoulders tightly. Her eyes were black like the depths of the ocean minus their bright red iris and her smile melted to something predatory; she dove forward, kissing Hide aggressively on his lips and forcing them open so her tongue could slide in. Hide squirmed under her, sunk his head furhter into the mattress to try and escape, but his efforts proved fruitless. Her kiss was nothing like Kaneki's; it was harsh and wet, her tongue feeling more like a slug than anything else. When she broke their kiss, she moved sideways, leaving red behind as she kissed along his jaw and down his neck.

"Es una pena que no esté en celo." She said hotly, deftly removing the bow tie to bite down on his collar and tugging back. For a moment, Hide worried she might bite right through it.

"Esto sería mucho más divertido."

She released a shaky breath over his skin, making him shiver, then edged her way off the bed while kissing down his torso. Her hands undid his pants easily, urging them off over his knees until he was left in his briefs. She eyed his crotch greedily, licking her lips before lowering down and licking up his shaft through the cloth and sinking her lips on it to suck.

Hide couldn't breathe, couldn't even watch and his hands flew to cover his face. He was being violated and there wasn't a thing he could do, only lay there and hope for it to end soon; the cold air hit him as his briefs were pulled back, only to be surrounded by an overwhelming heat when the woman took his flaccid length into her mouth. Tears welled in his eyes.

_This isn't happening. Make it stop. Please, please. Make it stop._

That familiar, lusting warmth began pooling in his stomach, only this time it felt more like a parasite coiling inside his guts. His tears flew down his temples and into his ears; he wanted to stop, but the more hard he became the more his heart tore in two. The woman popped off him with a loud suck, leaning back to admire her work and glancing at Hide.

"Cosa dulce. Yo me ocuparé de ti."

The bed creaked under her weight and she was straddling him again. His cock pressed against her groin, rubbing against something warm and wet. He sobbed quietly, his hands tensing over his face as she grabbed the base of his shaft and eased herself onto him; the heat was suffocating, making every breath laboured as he sobbed more and more. He hoped to God he would die right then and there.

Her hands were on his bare chest as she rocked back and forth, her moans growing louder with each plunge. As she went on, Hide learned to tune out her sounds and her touch, letting the rock of the mattress lull him into the sanctuary of his mind.

_I hope the others are okay. Tadashi is so shy, but I can tell he's a good person. I wonder who that other boy was? Is his mate okay? How will she react?_

Then, Kaneki came to mind and Hide felt his heartstrings snap.

 _What will I tell him? I'm tainted now. He won't want me. I love you, Kaneki. Please don't hate me after this._  
­

\-----

The woman was finally gone, but her scent hung heavily in the air like perfume, filling his nose until he wanted to cut it off. She whispered something in Hide's ear before leaving, but he already forgot. His tears stopped, their well running dry, and he lay on the bed with just the corner of the deep red duvet covering him. He couldn't think. Or feel. He simply existed in the midst of the room, uncaring that his pants were still around his ankles, or that he was covered in smeared lipstick stains. He never finished and for once, he didn't care and waited impatiently for his forced lust to dissipate. Eventually, the well-groomed man was back and directed Hide to clean up in the shower before coming back out to the main dining area. Hide obeyed, it was all he felt he could do. The hot, scalding water felt purifying, burning away all traces of the lady in red.  When he left the sanctum of the shower, he dressed back into his uniform and opened the door to the waiting doorman.

"Had fun?" he asked. Hide remained quiet.

"Don't be so stuck-up. She's your Madam now so you need to get used to it."

The doorman led Hide back down the hallway, but instead of turning right towards the ring, he turned left. Hide's eyebrows knitted together.

"Where are we going? Isn't the ring that way?" He asked.

"We aren't going to the ring. Like I said, you've been bought. We need to prep you."

"What? No." Hide halted, backing away from the tall man. "Please don't. I'll behave, I swear. J-just let me stay here in Tokyo. Please!"

The man clicked his tongue and gripped Hide's upper arm, practically dragging him down the hallway while he fought.

"You'll like Spain. Gorgeous country. Beautiful people. And Lady Valezquez is kind, she won't eat you until you're older."

"B-b-but isn't there an auction? I thought it wasn't until later?!"

"She bought you outright. Her family is very old. And very rich. She's a woman who gets what she wants and she wants you. Her plane is leaving tonight, we need to hurry."

"No! Stop!" He put all his weight in his heels to try and stop the man, but when he was becoming too tedious to handle the man picked him up like he was nothing more than a child, swinging him over his shoulder and continuing down the hallway.

They descended further down into the belly of the building, walking by the holding cells where Hide and the others were kept into a dark, musky room. Inside, Tsukiyama stood waiting along with two other well-dressed men.

"Mon chien!" He cried happily. "How fortuitous of you. Lady Valezquez seemed to have enjoyed your company so much, she bought you at your selling price! Aren't you happy to be spending the rest of your days in lovely Madrid?" 

Hide didn't answer, choosing instead to use all of his energy to fight back against the man who held his arms in front of him while the other helper secured them tightly with rope. With his hands tied, he was forced onto his knees.

"Honestly, you Omegas are so... _privelaged_. Your whole existance is meant to serve others, yet you act as if you deserve some kind of respect."

As he spoke, he paced quietly towards a firepit in the corner of the room. Inside, a small black cauldron hung from a hook with multiple iron sticks poking out from inside. Tsukiyama pulled one such stick out, the end screaming bright orange and decorated with a highly elaborate 'V'.

"You belong to Lady Valezquez. No one else. This mark will make sure of it."

Hide felt his whole stomach fall out from within. His eyes went wide at the sight of the brand as it edged closer.

"No! Stop! Don't do this!"

Tsukiyama didn't answer. Hide fought with the last of his strength, only to have his head held down to his chest while his shoulders were kept in place. The skin on his lower back prickled from the heat of the brand; it was so close now, his tears picked up again to create new trails on his face.

"Tsu...Tsukiyama-san," he sobbed, "Please don't."

"Don't you _ever_ say my name again."

A searing pain ripped through him as the hot metal was pushed against his spine. He arched away, his head throwing back and mouth opening to scream, but nothing came. His tears were hot on his cheeks, his skin burning in the grip of his captors and vision growing spotty; the pain tore down into his core and spiked up into his skull until he was certain his brain would explode, only to be met with disappointment when it didn't. When he tried to speak, his scream finally came, bouncing off the rock walls of the small room and ringing in his ears. Was that really his own voice?

"Tsukiyama-san," someone new entered the room, Hide was too shocked to see who. "We have an issue."

Tsukiyama removed the brand, making Hide slump over onto the floor when he was released. Drool seeped from his mouth, mixing with the dirt and grime, but Hide was far too out of it to care or notice. His back felt as if someone had just broken him in two, then tried to rebreak him into place. Surely if he moved he would fall apart.

"What kind of issue?" Tsukiyama demanded.

"It's the group from Anteiku. They've taken out men in the upper sector and are making their way through the building."

_Anteiku. Kaneki?_

"Get this one to the car and onto the plane for Valezquez. I'll take care of the rest."

Hide was being carried again; the pain shot through his spine and eminated to his fingertips, but he no longer had the strength to cry or scream. He was drained of everything he had.

"Nn...Ka...neki."

His vision was fading. He needed to see Kaneki one more time, to say goodbye and tell him how much he loved him before being secreted away to another country. They weren't mates, but maybe that was a good thing.

_He still has a chance. I hope he finds someone he loves._

Finally, his eyes closed and his mind went blank, receding into the safety of nothingness.

 


	8. Chapter 8

_Hurry, hurry, hurry!_

The man in the sharp, gray suit rushed out of the back of the building with the limp human in his arms, relishing in the cold wind that grazed his cheeks. He spotted the sleek black car that was waiting for him and haphazardly put the human in the back seat, ignoring his cry of pain from being treated so roughly.

_Get over it. You're off to a better life._

He started the car as soon as he was seated and threw it into gear, pulling out into the quiet street of the industrial district, his tires screeching with his sharp turn. Once he was on the street, he pulled out his phone to confirm the location again.

"Lady Valesquez's private jet isn't too far from here. Should get there in no--"

_**CRASH.** _

His phone went flying into the front window as he was lurched forward, putting his arm up in time to stop his head from smashing into the wheel. When all was settled, he looked through his cracked windshield to see a Ghoul crouching on his now concave hood, surrounded by the steam from the engine. His face was obscured by a black leather mask, the mouth zipped open to reveal his bared teeth, and his left eye was blazing black and red. His four kagune arms that sprouted from his lower back were poised to kill, all pointed straight at him.

"Give me the human!" He demanded.

The man groaned with disgust. _How annoying._ He thought and tilted his head from side-to-side to crack his stiff neck.

"I said give him to me!"

"He's not mine to give! And he sure as hell isn't yours! He belongs to Lady Valesquez."

As he spoke, the man in gray could feel his own kagune bristle beneath his skin, ready to pop out on command. The pain was exciting to him, raising every hair on his body and filling him with an unchecked energy. 

"So fuck off!"

In one swipe, his kagune arm broke through the windshield and launched him past the shattered glass. He swiped again, just barely missing the ghoul who jumped back onto the deserted street a few feet away from where the man landed.

"I don't want to fight you! Please, just give me Hide and we'll go."

The man laughed in mockery; for someone who had the guts to crash land on his car, he sounded extremely desperate now that he was faced with a battle.

"What's he to you? A friend? Just let him go! Lady Valesquez will treat him well. He'll live in luxury, be fed three times a day -- or more if that's what he wants! She loves to spoil her slaves. And he'll be in beautiful Madrid!"

The other ghoul stood silently, his kagune still out and ready to fight, fists clenched at his sides. He could tell he wasn't going to leave.

"If a fight's what you want...SO BE IT."

He lunged forward, kagune ready and thrust into the ghoul. The ghoul jumped back, again and again, dodging every slash and thrust without bothering to make a move himself. When he tried to make a run for the car, the man hurled sideways and slashed his kagune down into the ground to cut him off, causing the cement to break apart and fly about. Their eyes met in the pause of the action -- was he crying?

"You're pathetic!" He called out to taunt the other. "You won't even fight for your friend!"

 _Friend? Or something more?_

Then a fiery red arm came slashing from his side and the man jumped just in time to barely dodge it; as he landed, another arm came flying from above and he rolled away to dodge that, too.

_Finally, we're getting somewhere._

The ghoul jumped towards him this time to close their distance and all four arms came plunging towards the man. He jumped back, forgetting about the car; his heart stopped for a moment when he realized he had no escape. An arm came thrusting forward and pierced through his torso; he strained to breathe, coughing up blood when he did and was sent tumbling to the side. His regeneration wasn't anything special, so this hit was a major put-off. He grunted with each attempt to right himself and stand, but the blood wouldn't stop pouring; he watched as the ghoul walked towards the car and pried open the back door.

He wouldn't admit defeat. If he lost the human his life would be forfeit, and Lady V wasn't known for quick killings. When he felt he had healed just enough, the man ran towards the ghoul, launching into the air with his kagune raised, slicing through the air and knocking the ghoul sideways so he went flying with the door that broke off from the impact. The door skidded along the cement, carrying the ghoul with it as sparks flew out from underneath. The man gave him no time to recuperate and charged at him, this time going in for the kill. He was still weak, so if he was going to end this battle now was the time, for if he took another major hit like the one before he might not make it. 

The ghoul saw him coming, he scrambled to gain his footing but just as he was about to jump away his foot slipped on the smooth interior of the door; the man crashed down on him, hurling his kagune arm through his chest.

"Hngh! Guh!"

The ghoul grabbed at the man's kagune to pry it out, but it remained still in his chest. The man peered down at him, his black eyes glistening with excitement. He twisted his kagune inside the boy, making him screech in pain each time. Blood seeped from the corners of his mouth.

"You should have just left!"

He pulled out and reeled his arm back, ready to take out the boy's head when suddenly bright lights shined on them, blinding the pair. He looked to see who dared disrupted his kill and saw a black car had pulled up to them; he recognized the car as belonging to one of his colleagues. Sure enough, another man stepped out from the driver's seat wearing a crisp suit like he did; his long hair was tied back into a high ponytail and he stood just a few inches shorter.

"Hiroshi-san, enough." His deep voice was firm.

Hiroshi grunted in annoyance, but obeyed his colleague and stepped away from the ghoul who, by now, was already almost fully healed. 

"Let them go." His colleague stated. "Lady Valesquez doesn't want the human anymore."

Hiroshi was stunned -- she was so adamant about having the human transported to Spain tonight, so what could have ruined him for her? His kagune seeped into his back and he took a moment to fix his clothing that had crumpled during the battle. Meanwhile, the ghoul stood and backed away from him, but remained ready to defend himself.

"Why doesn't she want him? We already branded him."

The ghoul looked to him in horror and Hiroshi held back his smirk; that probably hurt worse than the wound he just gave him.

"She got his bloodwork back. It wasn't as perfect as Tsukiyama-san expected. She's absolutely livid."

"What is it? What's wrong with him?" Hiroshi asked. He was just as curious as the other ghoul was.

His colleague sighed deeply.

"He's pregnant."

* * *

Kaneki felt everything inside him go numb except for his chest that buzzed with...with something. He couldn't tell what he was feeling. He had no words to describe the sheer shock he was in and as he looked down to Hide who now lay lifeless in the back seat of the wrecked car, all he wanted to do was cry.

 _"You didn't know, did you?"_ He remembered the man say as if trying to add salt to his wounds. The other ghouls left not long ago, but the man's word still stuck to his mind like chewing gum on the bottom of his shoe. 

_"I thought it was odd, that someone would fight so hard for their friend. But you're more than that. You're his mate. And yet...when we scrubbed him down, no marks were found on him. How can you be his mate and not even claim him?"_

Embarrassment hit him again. He had nothing to say to the ghoul, no words to spit back at him. He was Hide's partner, but not only had he not marked him, he couldn't even protect him from being taken. From being beaten and humiliated, from being...marked by another. He reached into the backseat and lifted Hide's shirt -- there on his lower back was the deep red symbol, the letter "V" burned into his skin forever. He felt his tears pour freely down his cheeks behind his mask.

"Hide...I'm so sorry." He whispered. Hide was still knocked out, lying on his stomach across the backseat with his left side hanging off onto the floor.

Then, Hide groaned and his eyes opened just slightly.

"Ken...is that you?" He asked weakly. Kaneki clamoured into the backseat with Hide, staying on the floor so as not to disturb him. It was uncomfortable, but he didn't mind if it meant Hide was okay.

"It's me, Hide. I'm here."

"Whoa...s'that your mask? So...cool..." His hand lifted from the floor and grazed the soft leather of his mask, a faint smile playing on his lips. Kaneki sniffled and wiped away his tears.

"Hide I'm so sorry. I should have gone with you the last night. I shouldn't have left you alone, I was so stupid! I'm--"

"Shh...s'okay. You're here now." 

Kaneki could feel his thumb against his cheek and new tears fell all over again. He covered Hide's hand with his own and tilted into his palm.

"Thanks...for coming. I'm...so tired. Can't...sta..." His eyelids fluttered close and he was out again.

Kaneki sobbed once, letting go of all his emotions and letting his tears fall freely. Hide was hurt. He was branded. He was pregnant. But he was safe. And Kaneki vowed to never let something like this happen again. He leaned forward and kissed Hide, maneuvering the zipper of his mask so their lips could touch; Kaneki was trembling as they kissed, but Hide's subtle scent calmed some of his nerves. He was still sniffling when he gingerly plucked Hide from the car and carried him in his arms. When he turned around, he saw Touka and Yomo coming to meet him and he quickly wiped away any signs he was crying; he noticed Touka was limping and holding her hand over her side.

"Is he okay?" Touka asked when she was closer.

"Yeah, he's alive. What about you? You're wounded!"

"I'm fine. I'll heal soon, just takes time."

"Where did Tsukiyama-san's men go?" Yomo asked, looking to the beaten up car behind Kaneki. 

"They left. I guess Valesquez changed her mind."

"What? Why?"

"Uh," he paused for a split-second. "I don't know. Some other guy showed up, called it off, and they left. Where's Nishiki-san?" He needed to change the subject.

"We lost him. We were in the middle of fighting when he said 'Kimi!' and left." Touka said worriedly.

"What about Tsukiyama-san?"

"He's taken care of. For now. We better not stick around though, there's still a lot of ghouls in the area." Touka turned to walk away and the other two joined her. 

Their group chose to stick to the rooftops so they could run freely without worrying about humans catching them, but before they could even reach the second rooftop they were stopped. A large, bulky ghoul stood in their way and next to him, a shorter young man wearing dark clothing and a cape. Touka inhaled a shaky breath at the sight.

"Ayato..."

"Who--"

"Ken Kaneki!" The taller ghoul called out in his booming voice. Kaneki felt the skin on the back of his neck prickle.

"I've been waiting for you." He spoke quieter this time, but Kaneki still heard him clear as day.

"Ayato!" Touka called out and the younger Ghoul looked to her with a smirk.

"What the hell are you doing here?!" She asked.

"You talk as if you deserve to know my business, big sister."

"Sister--!" Kaneki looked between the two in utter shock. Touka's supposed brother had dark, shaggy hair and although he couldn't make out his features, at first glance they did look very much alike.

"Ugh fuck this. We can take them." Touka said and changed her stance so she was ready to charge.  
Kaneki nodded, though he was worried about how well Touka could fight in her condition. Her wound was still healing.

"Yomo-san, take Hide and get him somewhere safe."

Kaneki pushed Hide into Yomo's arms. "He's hurt real bad so...so be careful with him."

Yomo nodded and ran in the other direction; Kaneki watched him run with Hide and his heart reached out to him.

_Please be okay. I'll see you soon._

"How sentimental. Disgusting." Ayato spat and Kaneki focused his full attention on him.

He was already fully healed from his last battle, albeit a bit tired, but he pulled any strength he had from his inner reserves and readied himself for another round. He spread his feet apart to shoulder-width, then clenched and unclenched his fists. The taller ghoul removed his old hockey mask, revealing a sinister smile and lizard-like eyes; his hand came up next to his face and he cracked his middle knuckle so loudly Kaneki could hear it from his spot on the roof. Kaneki had no clue who this ghoul was, or what he wanted with him, but if he was stepping between him and Hide then he was an enemy.

With that in mind, Kaneki and Touka charged.

* * *

_You're going to be okay._

_I'm here with you._

_I'll never leave you again._

_Hide!_

Hide woke suddenly with a gasp. His forehead was wet and he felt sticky all over from his cold sweat. He fearfully looked around -- old wooden coffee table, familiar forest green rug, a window above him and the feel of an old, leather couch. The last detail, the smell of coffee, confirmed he was at Anteiku Cafe.

 _I'm not in Spain. I'm still in Tokyo._

A wave of relief washed over him and he allowed himself to settle into the couch. Lying on his back, there was an itching pain that irritated him in his lower back. He sat up -- his skin felt tight as it stretched with him and reached behind to feel something ragged, like a thick scab. His memories came flooding back to him.

_It's a scar. The branding. Lady Valesquez had me branded after she...after..._

He swallowed hard. He couldn't say it and chose to skip over that part of the night, though her harrowing moans echoed in his ears. Then he remembered the faint smell of Kaneki and his mask, the soft leather beneath his fingers. Kaneki had rescued him. He gently stood up from the couch and instantly, bile pooled in his throat as his stomach churned. He remembered there was a bathroom on this floor by the laundry room and ran out down the hall, just making it in time to empty his stomach contents into the toilet. Not much came out since he hadn't eaten in a couple days. 

When his nausea passed, he rinsed his mouth and made his way downstairs, careful not to disturb anyone who may be there. When he made it down, he noticed the darkness outside the cafe and all the lights in the neighbourhood were out except for a few apartments. He looked at the clock above the bar.

 _Twelve?_ It's _midnight?_

"Hide-kun."

Hide whipped around and saw the manager, Yoshimura, standing at the top of the stairs.

"Yoshimura-san." He acknowledged and made way for the older man as he walked down the steps.

"Are you hungry?"

Hide's stomach grumbled loud enough for both of them to hear and he nodded his head bashfully. Yoshimura smiled and stepped behind the bar to grab some pre-made food from the fridge. He offered Hide a coffee and he agreed immediately -- he really needed the warmth and comfort of a cup of coffee right about now. He sat at the bar across from Yoshimura trying his best not to devour the sandwich in one go.

"How are you feeling? You had a rough couple of nights." 

Again, the image of Lady V riding him flashed in his mind and his heart sank. 

"Y-yeah. It was bad. I'm okay though." He lied, biting another piece of the sandwich to hide his facade.

"Glad to hear it. Yomo-san brought you back a couple of hours ago. You were out cold."

"What about Kaneki? I remembered Kaneki was there, too."

"Ah....yes. Yomo-san said Kaneki-kun stayed behind to fight off an enemy that got in your way. He left shortly after dropping you here to go back and help."

Hide stopped mid-chew.

_He's still out there?!_

Swallowing the rest of his sandwich, he stood up from the bar, brushing his palms together to rid the tiny crumbs.

"I have to go help him."

"Hide-kun, no. You need to stay here."

"But he's--"

"Out fighting to protect you. If you knew what he had to do just to rescue you, you would understand. Don't make all his efforts for nothing by going out there and getting caught again."

For the first time, the old ghoul's usual kind expression was replaced by something serious and borderline frightening, like that of an angry grandmother.

"Okay. You're right. I'll stay put." Hide surrendered and sat back down at the bar to resume his coffee and sandwich.

Shortly after, Hide was hit with another rush of sleep and he retired to his sanctuary upstairs on the old couch. It was raining outside, so Yoshimura provided a thick knitted blanket to keep him warm and the hypnotizing sound of the rain on the glass had Hide falling asleep easily.

By morning, he was rested and could hear commotion downstairs. It sounded too quiet to be the regular hustle and bustle of the cafe, so he quickly got up and torpedoed down the steps, eager to greet Kaneki.

But he wasn't there. Only Touka, Yomo, Yoshimura and...his college senpai?

"Nishiki-senpai?!" 

"Hide-kun...good to see you're alive." He answered, keeping his spot leaning against the bar.

"What...why are you...are you a Ghoul!?"

Nishiki scoffed and put his hands up in a mocking gesture. "Got me."

"But why are you here?"

"His girlfriend was also taken by Tsukiyama-san." Yoshimura explained. "Luckily, Kimi-kun was rescued."

"Kimi-chan?? She's your girlfriend? I met her while we were imprisoned!"

There was so much information flying at him at once, Hide could barely process it. He chose to move on.

"Where's Kaneki?" He asked.

The group looked at each other, then Touka spoke.

"He's...missing."

"Missing?? What happened last night?"

"We were on our way back when we got stopped by Ayato and some guy in a hockey mask. Me and Kaneki tried to fight them off but...fuck!" Touka banged her fist on the table in frustration.

He didn't need to ask more. Hide closed his lips tight and sat down at one of the tables near the window. All he wanted to do was cry, he felt so pathetic. If he was more careful, he wouldn't have been captured. Kaneki wouldn't have gone after him or fought for him. He wouldn't be missing.

_No. There's no time for self-pity. Kaneki needs you._

With a deep breath, he raised his head and spoke to Yoshimura.

"Yoshimura-san, do you know who this ghoul might be?"

"...There's a Ghoul in the 13th ward by the name Yakumo Oomori, or 'Yamori' as he prefers. He used to be the leader of the White Suits."

"I've heard of him." Yomo cut in calmly. "He's brutal. Likes to torture people. Earned the nickname 'Jason' because of it and his mask. He's also been known to--"

"Shut it." Touka scolded suddenly.

"What? What is it? I want to know." Hide pushed.

Touka made a frustrated sound and shook her head. 

"The reason he's so powerful is because he's a cannibal."

Hide's face went ghost white. 

_No. No, no, no. It's not true. Kaneki is still alive._

"C--cannibal? Ghouls can do that?"

"Eating other Ghouls is...deplorable," Yoshimura stated. "But it brings immeasurable power and strength. It also drives Ghouls insane if they do if frequent enough."

Everyone fell silent for a moment to let the information sink in. Hide tried his best to not let himself fall into despair, but knowing Kaneki was taken by a cannibalistic Ghoul...

"There's another matter we need to discuss." Yoshimura started. "The reason why Lady Valesquez abandoned you, Hide-kun."

Hide looked confused.

"What do you mean? I thought you guys rescued me?"

"We did, but only because Tsukiyama's men let you go. We found out why. It was about your bloodwork. Do you know?" Touka asked, standing up from her chair and stepping towards Hide.

_My bloodwork? Right. They took blood from all of us when we were imprisoned. I'm clean though, there's no way I'm diseased!_

"Do you know?" Touka asked again, this time more forcefully. Her eye that wasn't covered by her purple hair was narrowing as she questioned him.

"Know what?! My blood is clean! There's nothing that could have set her off!"

He could hear Yoshimura and Yomo release a heavy breath.

"Hide...the reason Lady Valesquez abandoned you is...you're pregnant."

"What?!"

_No way. I can't be! I--I--_

Suddenly, many things made sense -- his nausea that came and went, his neverending fatigue, his decrease in appetite and overall general malaise. Everything pointed to pregnancy, but he still couldn't accept it.

"H-how?! This can't be possible!"

"Well," Touka looked off to the side. "There was that night...in the alleyway..."

Hide's mouth fell open -- she was right. That night when he first found out about Kaneki being a Ghoul, Hide went into heat and they...mated. Hide groaned in defeat, letting his head fall onto the table. Touka sat in the seat across from him and he felt her hand on his shoulder.

"It's okay, we'll be here for you. The abortion will be hard, but--"

"What." Hide raised his head from the table and glared at her.

"The abortion. Hide, you _can't_ keep it." She said plainly.

"Says who!?"

"Says nature." Nishiki stepped in now. "You and Kaneki aren't the first Ghoul-Human pairing, you know. There have been hundreds since Ghouls showed up, and many have tried to have children."

"Humans and Ghouls can't have children together. The child is always a Ghoul. If Kaneki were pregnant, it'd be a different story. But you're a human. What do you think a Ghoul fetus will do to a Human host?" Touka asked.

Images of old 'Alien' movies and alien babies busting through chests had Hide grimacing, but he didn't want to believe in what Touka was saying. 

"No. I don't believe it." He said while shaking his head. "I'm sure someone has had children with a Ghoul. There has to be! I can't...I can't just..."

He was pregnant with Kaneki's child. His Alpha. His Omega instincts had him cradling his stomach and the next nine months flashed before him. The leather collar around his neck was suddenly itching again.

"Hide-kun." Yoshimura spoke up from behind the bar. "With all due respect...I agree with you. I think you should keep the child."

"What!" Touka and Nishiki exclaimed in shock while Hide lit up, smiling with joy at the old Ghoul.

"Manager, you can't say that! You know what will happen! He'll die!"

"Not necessarily. There have been some relationships -- very few, mind you -- where a Ghoul and Human have mated successfully and birthed healthy children."

Hide was feeling hopeful. Yoshimura was old and from what he knew, he was born a Ghoul. Maybe his parents were Ghouls, or was one human? He could be the very result of a successful Ghoul-Human partnership and the thought that Hide and Kaneki had a chance at becoming parents, no matter how slim, had Hide buzzing with joy.

"But Hide, you should know it's a difficult road you travel. A Ghoul child in a Human host acts almost like a parasite. It will feed off you, drain you of all your strength and in most cases...the Human parent does perish."

Hide gulped.

"However, we will help you. For obvious reasons, you can't see a regular doctor. The RC cells from the fetus will be present in your bloodwork. I can contact a doctor for you for regular check-ups and if you'd like, you can stay here. For safety. I'm sure Kaneki-kun would agree."

Hide nodded and cradled his stomach tighter. Just knowing there were people to support him, even if it was just Yoshimura, had him at ease. Even more so knowing there were doctors in the Ghoul world who could help him through his pregnancy.

And of course, Kaneki would be there, too.

"I don't agree with this at all. But...I'll be here, too." Touka added and Hide smiled at her.

"I won't. Hide, you're being a fucking idiot and letting your Omega instincts go to your head. You're going to _die_. Do you understand?" Nishiki spoke bitterly and Hide almost receded from his glare alone, but he already made his mind up.

"Nishiki-senpai...I can't abort it. It's Kaneki's, you have no idea--"

"Shut up! If you want to die over a god damn fetus, then so be it. But I'm not going to be around to watch."

With that, he stormed out of the cafe; Hide was left shaken. He had no clue why Nishiki was so passionate about Hide's choice, he never showed the slightest implication he even cared about Hide. However, even with Nishiki, Hide still had some sort of support system and for that he was grateful.

"Thanks, Touka. And to you, Yoshimura-san. Yomo-san. I don't know what I would do without any of you, but this child," he looked down to his stomach, overwhelmed with the thought there was a fetus growing inside him. "It means the world to Kaneki and I. So thank you all for supporting us."

Everyone, those who agreed and who didn't, smiled in support and Hide felt at peace with his decision.

"Now. Let's save Kaneki."

_**DING** _

The bell tolled ominously and everyone looked to see a group of men standing in the doorway, a little too close to Hide for his comfort. They looked rough, like they were part of a gang, brandishing tattoos and large piercings. The man who stood at the front had styled his goatee so it formed a thick spiral on his chin and he stood with his hands in his pockets while looking around the room smugly.

"I'm sorry, sir, we're closed at the moment," Yoshimura spoke calmly.

"Really? This place looks busy for being closed." He said jokingly and everyone remained quiet.

"Doesn't matter, I just need some information."  
The man walked passed Hide, not even paying him any mind, and Hide sighed in relief, but his gang followed obediently behind him. They were here to cause trouble, that much was obvious.

"All I want to know is...where's Kamashiro Rize?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....And boom goes the dynamite.  
>  Honestly I never imagined I'd be writing an m!preg fic, BUT HERE WE ARE HAHA.   
> Tbh, I understand if m!preg isn't your thing, it's not really my "thing" either, but when I was concocting the story it just made sense, y'know? Like, OF COURSE Hide's pregnant, just gotta add one more thing onto Kaneki's lap with all the other shit he's got going on (and with what's gonna come. Poor Kaneki ~this post~ for more information. Thank you!!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GOOD LORD, A CHAPTER.  
> I apologize for the long wait. Life got a bit...messy and it took a while to find my motivation again.  
> This chapter is more of a bridge, but there were a lot of details I needed to take care of to keep in line with the canonverse since this story is coming to an end QUITE SOON.   
> Enjoy!!

Everyone in the cafe froze when Rize's name was spoken so casually and the hair on the back of Hide's neck rose as if speaking her name brought her back to life.

"Yo, are you all deaf?" The man shifted his weight on his feet impatiently. "I want to know where Kamashiro Rize is!"

"She's not here," Touka spoke up suddenly. "And who the hell are you to come barging in here and barking at us like a stray dog?"

"Tch." The man spat. "Name's Kazuichi Banjou and this is my crew. Word is she came to this cafe pretty often, so you must have seen her recently, yeah?"

"Can't say we have."

Hide noticed no one was telling him the truth about Rize and he wondered if that was for their benefit or his. He shrunk against the window hoping to go unnoticed, but Banjou saw him shift in his peripheral vision and switched his target.

"Well." Effortlessly, Banjou grabbed Hide by the collar of his jacket and lifted him in the air. Hide clawed at the chair in hopes of keeping himself grounded but to no avail. "Maybe if I rough up your friend here you'll talk?"

"Let me go!" Hide exclaimed and flailed about wildly to be dropped, but Banjou dodged him easily.

"No! Drop him!"

Touka, Yomo, and Yoshimura were on edge and all three stood in anticipation of a fight. Banjou smirked, showing his gleaming teeth while raising a white-knuckled fist.

"Figured this would get a reaction."

His fist pulled back and Hide's eyes went wide -- he was powerless, all he could do was protect his unborn child and curled in on himself with his forearms over his stomach and eyes closed.

But the hit never came. Instead, he heard a bone-breaking _ **CRACK** _ and opened his eyes to see Touka in front of him, leg extended out and Banjou's forearm bending an unnatural ninety degrees and hanging limply from a protruding bone.

"Y-YOU! BITCH! MY ARM!" Hide was dropped roughly but landed on his feet.

"BOSS!" His crew cried and in a single beat, the cafe exploded into violence.

Hide scrambled under a table and did his best to keep himself out of harm's way. He knew the noise would rouse suspicion from the outside, but luckily the blinds were closed, keeping the fight mostly hidden.

Kagune flew about as they collided in mid-air. Yomo and Touka were in the thick of the fight taking on the entire squad of men easily and even Yoshimura seemed ready to fight and landed a few hits on any stragglers that strayed from the commotion. Glass shattered, chairs splintered, coffee beans spilled and blood stained the walls; yet, it all ended just as quickly as it started when Banjou was finally knocked out cold and collapsed onto the floor with a hard thud. His men rushed to his side and once they confirmed he was still alive, they surrendered.

About a half hour later Banjou woke up to see his men sitting quietly with Hide, Touka, Yoshimura, Yomo, and now Hinami and Uta who had come to the cafe shortly after the fight. He rushed to sit up, regretting it instantly when a painful throb radiated up his broken arm, which was now tenderly bandaged.

"Boss relax, it's okay." His one friend said.

"Banjou-san, while you were out your friends spoke with us about you and Rize. We understand why you acted the way you did." Yoshimura said sympathetically.

"Still doesn't excuse his behaviour. The cafe is trashed!" Touka complained.

Banjou looked around the room and spotted Hide who stood quietly in the corner with his arms over his chest. Hide met his gaze nervously and Touka bristled with the urge to defend her friend; Banjou stood up then and the room grew tense as he walked over to Hide. Hide gulped and stood on the balls of his feet to run.

"Hey!" Touka said, standing up from the couch with Hinami at her side. But then, Banjou fell to his knees and bowed to Hide.

"I'm so sorry!" He cried out. "Please forgive me! I just--miss her so much! I was willing to do anything for information on her, you know?!"

In fact, Hide did know. He understood exactly how Banjou felt when it came to missing someone who was dear to you and sympathized with him, sighing heavily.

"It's fine, Banjou-san. Stand up."

Banjou obeyed, raising his chin proudly and nodding to Hide, then took his seat back on the couch. He explained his passionate love for Rize despite her never reciprocated his feelings; as it were, he worked for a group known as Aogiri Tree who had instructed Banjou to find Rize. He feared what they would do to her and was planning on telling her to run.

"Their leader is merciless." He explained, his eyes full of worry.

"Who is he?" Uta asked.

"He goes by Ayato."

Touka tensed at the sound of her estranged brother's name

"Kirishima Ayato?!"

Banjou nodded. "Yeah, that's him."

"Does he lead with anyone else? Maybe someone named Yamori?" Hide prodded with his hopes high while stepping closer to the couch and stopping just by the coffee table.

"Uh, yeah actually. Yamori is more of a subordinate, to be honest, but I see him hanging around Ayato all the time. How do you guys know him?"

At once, the Anteiku group looked to each other, all coming to the same conclusion subconsciously.

"Banjou-san," Hide started, "Could you take us there? Yamori took a really close friend of ours -- my mate -- and we need to rescue him."

Banjou sat back in shock.

"Take you to Aogiri Tree? You don't understand what you're asking. They aren't friends of anybody. They don't care if your Human or Ghoul -- if you're an enemy, they'll kill you. If Yamori took your friend..."

Banjou looked down solemnly, as did his friends and Hide's anger fluttered.

"Please! You know I'm Omega -- he's my fated Alpha, I swear by it. If I lose him...Banjou-san, I'm--" Hide took a breath. He still wasn't used to announcing his new predicament and his voice faltered as he spoke.

"I'm pregnant. We need to rescue him."

Again, Banjou was taken aback. He looked to Hide's stomach, then back at him to meet his intense stare. Next to Hide all the staff of Anteiku looked on just as fiercely; Banjou knew that even if he said 'no', they would find a way to Aogiri Tree to rescue their friend but with his help, they might have a fighting chance.

"Okay, let's do it! I'll help you guys rescue your friend."

Hide was elated and beamed at Banjou. Looking around at all the people -- at all the Ghouls -- who were ready to help Kaneki, he realized just how lucky he was to have them all in his life.

Within the hour, they had an action plan done up; Banjou would take the group to Aogiri as captives and from the inside, they would find Kaneki's whereabouts to rescue him. It wasn't a solid plan, but it was all they had with minimal information.

"Isn't our group too big to be considered captives? There's..." Nishiki took a moment to count everyone who was present, "six of us versus four of your group, Banjou-san. Not to rub it in, but it only took three to make your group surrender."

"Ngh..." Banjou gritted his teeth together.

"He's right. We should split-up. Nishiki, Uta, and I will go as the captives. Yoshimura, Yomo, and Hinami, you scout out the outside and see if you can find anything." Touka directed.

"This is great! With all of us, I know we'll be able to find him." Hide stated optimistically.

"Hide-kun, I think it would be best for you to stay behind."

Hide looked to Yoshimura and his smile faded, eyebrows furrowing.

"What? I can't come with you guys?" His voice lowered, making him sound like a hurt puppy and Yoshimura shifted uncomfortably.

"Well, maybe if--"

"Manager, don't be serious." Touka corrected, feeling rather disappointed in the old man.

"Hide you can't come. You aren't strong or fast like us, you'll only slow us down. And what if you get hurt?? You can't heal like us either."

Hide rubbed at the back of his neck awkwardly when he realized just how useless he was as a human amongst a squad of ghouls.

"Besides. Kaneki would lose it if he found out we let you come along in...your state."

His hand dropped to his stomach and he sighed in defeat. Even if his bloodwork said he was pregnant, it was far too early for him to even be feeling like he was carrying around a mini-person inside him, so he kept forgetting just how protected he needed to be. Even if he did have a chance against Aogiri Tree, she was right about Kaneki losing his mind if he knew Hide was putting their baby at risk and the very thought of being lectured by Kaneki at the end of all this had him quickly making up his mind.

"Okay...you're right. _Again._ " Touka smiled smugly at Hide. "I'm going to head home then and try to keep up on what's happening. Maybe I'll see what I can find out about the CCG."

"Onii-san," Hinami said and Hide just about had a heart attack from the endearing term. "Will you be okay? I don't want you to get hurt..."

She frowned worriedly and Hide decided then-and-there he would die for this little girl if need be.

"I'll be fine, Hinami-chan. I'm more worried about you! Are you really going to help fight?"

Hinami nodded, smiling proudly.

"Onii-san is in trouble. I have to help him, just like when he helped me. I'll be okay, I promise. I want to meet Little Brother, after all!"

Hide's heart was ready to explode and in his surge of happiness, he pulled Hinami into a tight embrace; when she hugged him back, he felt a calming warmth bloom within his chest. Though she was still young, she was a Ghoul and would be with everyone else, so Hide tried not to worry himself too much.

**_DING_ **

The door rang gently and all eyes turned to find Tsukiyama Shuu standing in the doorway; everyone, except for Banjou and his group, tensed up. Touka's lips curled in pure hatred while Hide slinked back to hide behind the group of Ghouls, dragging Hinami with him.

"What the fuck...we need to start locking that door," Nishiki muttered angrily.

"Bonjour, Anteiku staff. I've come to negotiate civility with--oh my, what happened here?" Tsukiyama stood proudly while investigating the disarray of the cafe, wearing his signature purple suit with his short hair parted perfectly to the side.

"None of your business." Touka spat back at him.

"No matter, I'm only here for one thing. Where's Hide-kun, hm? I'd like to speak with him."

Hide gulped. There was no use hiding since he knew Tsukiyama could sniff him out. Like a scared pup, Hide stepped out to the front of the group until he was just a few feet away. He wanted to stand tall against Tsukiyama, but just hearing his voice brought back painful memories of his horrid night -- the torture, the rape, the burning pain of his branding -- he kept his eyes downcast to avoid meeting Tsukiyama's gaze. When Tsukiyama spoke again, he only spoke to Hide.

"Your Alpha, Kaneki-kun. He's quite capable, isn't he?" Hide looked up to the Ghoul with a curious look.

"Yes...he is."

"I thought so. I knew it the moment I met him. He's...remarquable!"

Hide had no clue what he said, but judging by the smile on his face he guessed it was some sort of compliment.

"He has earned my respect and admiration. And as his mate, so have you. Hide-kun." Stepping back, Tsukiyama bowed to Hide with one hand over his stomach while the other extended into the air behind him.

"I apologize for what I have done to you. If you would please forgive me, I would see to it that I stay by you and Kaneki-kun. As a friend."

"Uh---wha-?"

Hide stood speechless; before him, an Alpha from a well-known Ghoul family was bowing to HIM, an Omega and a Human. There was no way Tsukiyama was telling the whole truth, he clearly had ulterior motives but what, Hide couldn't figure it out.

"Tsukiyama-san, I....I don't know if I can forgive you. Perhaps in time...things will change. Kaneki would say the same thing."

"So be it. Until that day, I wish to work with you and Kaneki. And the group of Anteiku, of course."

Rising from his bow as he spoke, he looked to the group behind Hide who were slowly settling back down.

"Great! Actually, we--"

"However," he interrupted. "If Kaneki-kun proves to be weak or inferior in any way, I will devour you _both_."

Standing up, he caused a stir of chills inside Hide that rattled down his back when their eyes met.

"Perhaps I'll even wait until your child is born. It's been a while since I dined on such tender meat."

His smile curled into something menacing but instead of fear Hide only felt anger. His job was to protect he and Kaneki's child, so even if the one threatening it was a powerful supernatural being, he couldn't resist the reflexive temper that boiled up at his words. Even before the group could jump to Hide's defense, he was already moving. From the nearby table, he grabbed a salt shaker and whipped it at the Ghoul's head; normally, Tsukiyama could easily dodge it, but the move was so unexpected the object just grazed his hair as he moved, wiping the smile from his face.

"Hey!" Hide called. Tsukiyama stopped, the room froze.

"Don't you dare threaten my child!" He said. His fists were balled up at his sides, making the muscles of his forearms bulge and he gritted his teeth as he spoke. "I might only be Human, but if you ever threaten my child again, I won't stop Kaneki from destroying you! And he will! He'll tear you apart before you can even scream!"

Nishiki was pulling at Hide's shoulder, ready to toss him out of harm's way but Hide kept his stance and stared Tsukiyama down.

"If you really want to help Kaneki, then help us rescue him from Aogiri Tree!"

There was a moment of silence as Tsukiyama registered he had just been threatened by a human, but then his smile crept back and he broke out into a roaring laughter. His head was thrown back as he laughed and Hide only grew more irritated with him. When he settled, he was wiping tears from his eyes.

"Hide-kun, you really are something else! I can see why Kaneki-kun chose you as his mate. So yes! I will help in the rescue of Kaneki Ken!"

Collectively, the group released a tense sigh and everyone started discussing the plan again, but Hide was left shaking in the aftermath of his actions. He had just threatened a very powerful Ghoul and lived.

When he gathered himself, Hide apologized to Yoshimura for the broken shaker and doled out what little cash he had to pay for it. He agreed to stay at home during the attack since the cafe would be unguarded and was too high-risk, but no one seemed happy with that idea.

"Someone should stay behind to protect Hide." Nishiki argued, but Hide was fully against it.

"You need everyone to pull this off. I'll be fine on my own. I'll keep the lights off, the noise down, and pretend like I'm not even there. Kaneki is the priority here."

Hide could tell no one was pleased, so he flashed his biggest smile.

"Good luck guys!" He said before turning his back to leave.

 _Please bring him back to me._ He wished silently, his smile fading instantly when he was out of sight.

* * *

When he returned home, it felt more like he was entering a tomb. All was quiet except for the worn creak of his door as it swung open and his belongings were left untouched; looking to the bed, the sheets were still ruffled from when he and Kaneki fooled around and it dawned on him he hadn't been home since that night.

His wound itched and he carefully scratched at the edges, ensuring he did no damage so the scar would heal as clean as possible. As he scratched, the Lady in Red popped into his mind and his head twitched as if her image alone struck a harsh blow.

In a daze, he entered his room, gently closing the door and locking it -- he fell face-first onto his bed and let the weight of the silence sink down on him. So much had happened in the few days that had passed -- Hide was taken, almost sent away to a foreign country where he'd never see his family again; he was branded and raped, and before it could get any worse he was rescued only to have Kaneki be the one taken in his absence. Now, the very man who orchestrated his kidnapping was helping with Kaneki's rescue. How that happened, he hadn't a clue -- Tsukiyama Shuu would forever remain a mystery to him.

Yet the most unbelievable part of this whole story was that Hide was pregnant. He was carrying the very beginnings of a child inside him -- of Kaneki's child inside. He rolled over onto his back and looked down to his stomach, placing his palm over it thinking he'd feel it somehow even though it was just a mass of cells at this point.

_Aren't we all just masses of cells? It's like Dr. Seuss said -- a person's a person, no matter how small._

His fingers drummed against his soft belly and he smiled faintly. He wondered what their child would look like; would he -- or she -- have gray eyes like Kaneki? Or brown ones? Black hair or blond? Would they be tall, short, smart, a book-lover, a music-lover, or maybe both? Would they be creative or academic? Maybe they'd be shy. Or very popular. Most importantly...

"Are you Human or Ghoul?" he asked his stomach.

Being a pregnant male, the pregnancy didn't have the best chances. Hide recounted the stories from sexual education -- males got sick easily, they needed more care, more bed rest, and the risks of pregnancy were five times higher. Not only that but since a natural birth was impossible, he would have to undergo surgery and that had all sorts of its own risks involved. And now that there was a chance his baby was a Ghoul...well, his next few months were looking grim. However, Hide wanted to stay positive. He knew Kaneki had already thought of all this and more, so he wanted to make sure at least one of them was looking forward to the days to come. With something to finally occupy his mind from the fact his friends were currently out fighting for Kaneki's life, Hide grabbed his laptop, switched on the television for background noise, and got to researching Male Pregnancies.

* * *

An hour had flown by like nothing and Hide's brain was bustling with all sorts of information. Pre-natal vitamins would help with providing important nutrition, as well as leafy greens and vegetables -- he already had a grocery list done up, as well as a variety of clothes he would need as his belly grew. Not only that, but there was tons of furniture that could be shifted as the baby grew, supporting them from infant to child and Hide marked down every name.

"Names!" He exclaimed. "I didn't even think -- oh my god, what are we going to name him?! Her. It?"

 **"And now, the six o'clock news."** The television announced and Hide barely paid it any mind.

**“Good evening everyone, I’m Nijie Matsuyama and tonight we start with some breaking live news. The CCG has just begun an attack on a well-known Ghoul-run group known as Aogiri Tree.”**

Hide halted -- did she just mention Aogiri Tree?

**“Their whereabouts have been unknown for over a decade since their eradication from the 24th Ward, but just recently the CCG discovered their new headquarters in the 11th Ward. Oh -- joining us now is my colleague Mochihito Kawamoto, who is out with our crew in the 11th ward. Mochihito-san?”**

There was a pause as the field anchor got the message to start and Hide watched desperately with his eyes glued to the screen.

 **“Thank you,** Nijie **-san. We’re currently outside of a large industrial complex that the CCG infiltrated just moments ago. We’re going to try and get in closer to the action!”**

On screen, the cameraman followed the news anchor through the dark forest, his light illuminating only what was immediately surrounding them. When they came to a clearing, the complex was in the background and distant gunfire could be heard.

 **“Mochihito-** san **, be careful! Aren’t** there **Ghouls in the area?”**

 **“Not to worry, the Doves are here and we’re keeping our** dist **\--”**

Suddenly, a fiery explosion lit up the background, creating a looming mushroom shape as it dissipated into the air. Hide turned the television off.

“Fuck. I’m so stupid!”

Without any hesitation, he threw on his jacket and rushed from his dorm to his bike. The 11th Ward was at least a twenty-minute bike ride away, but with no spare cash and the public transit shutting down after ten o’clock, he had no other choice but to pedal harder than he ever had before. Not even the cold air burning his cheeks as the wind whizzed by could distract him from his thoughts -- he had so much confidence in his friends, he was sure the plan would be easy to execute. But with the CCG on the scene, his friends were in danger. Kaneki was in danger.

_I should have known better. I just stayed at home googling stupid baby names!_

He pedaled faster until his legs ached, but even then he didn’t quit. Each street rushed by counting down to how much farther he had to go and as time went on, his guilt ate away at him like maggots on rotting flesh. What if he was too late? Everyone could be dead already. But if he wasn’t, what was he going to do? Maybe a distraction?

_Or a nuisance._

Could he fight?

_And put the baby in jeopardy? No way._

So then what was left?

_I could...I could..._

He crossed the district line between the 10th and 11th Ward; he was so close now. The streets slowly grew quiet, dark, and more deserted and he felt as if eyes were on him the moment he crossed into the district. It could have been his paranoia, but considering the ward he was in, perhaps his paranoia was a good thing right now. He turned down a beaten path -- nothing his bike couldn’t handle, and soon enough the sound of gunshots caught his ears. Hurrying on, he came to a large hill and just over the top there was the glowing orange light of the fire. Jumping off his bike, he hurried up the hill with it wheeling at his side and when he reached the edge....only chaos greeted him.

Multiple burning flames decorated the rooftops and windows, bathing the entire scene in an apocalyptic visage. Gunfire and screams painted horrific images in Hide’s mind of Ghouls and Humans alike being disemboweled, torn apart, beheaded, and all sorts of other terrible things he hoped wouldn’t imprint on his unborn child, if that were a thing. Worst of all, seeing the scenery below made him realize one very important detail:

He was completely useless.

He had zero fighting skills. He could sneak around, but if he were caught he would be toast. He scouted out the area for places where the fighting seemed less dense and spotted a building to the left with the least amount of fire spouting from it. He hurried down the hill with no plan whatsoever. All he knew was he needed to find Kaneki and his friends -- whatever happened after that was completely up to chance. As he neared the building, he crouched down low against the building, cursing his affinity for brightly coloured clothes, and hopped inside via a broken window. The hallway was clear and eerily quiet; screams echoed off the concrete walls and he realized then how much danger he was in. Without a clue where to go, he let his gut guide him and headed left.

 _Hide you god damn idiot. Why am I here? I’m putting so much at risk being here_ ohhhh _my god. I should’ve just had a nap at home._

He kept glued to the wall as he turned the corner.

**_CLICK-CLICK_ **

Still crouched, he was now facing down the barrels of two guns and he froze on the spot. He was cold and hot at the same time; his fingers were numb but his skin never felt more electrifying as adrenaline kicked up inside him. His mind screamed at him to run, but he knew if he did he would be dead on the ground before he could even step away.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

On the either side of the barrels were two Dove investigators -- a young woman with cropped blonde hair and a taller man with short black hair. Hide recognized them from news reports as two of the top investigators at the CCG; Akira Mado and Koutarou Amon. Their Alpha scent struck Hide instantly, making his knees weak as his pheromones inked into the air from his fear.

"Uh--um. I'm--"

"Speak!" Amon ordered in a striking voice.

"I-I'm Nagachika Hideyoshi. I h-heard about what was happening here on the news and--and--and wanted to see for myself."

"Why would you want to come to a Ghoul-infested ward?" Akira asked. Neither of them were lowering their guns just yet.

"Curiosity, I guess? I've always wanted to be an investigator, you know. I thought -- maybe this is my chance!" His sweat trickled down his back like a waterfall and he hoped his lie was convincing enough. If he wasn't careful, his scent could give him away.

"Ugh." Akira grunted, lowering her weapon and standing up. "This is no place to play make-believe! There are Ghouls here, you understand? You're going to die if you stay any--"

**_CRASH_ **

Around them, bits of concrete came falling down from above, sending dust into the air and tiny rocks sputtering about. When it cleared, behind the two investigators stood a menacing Ghoul with his teeth bared and two eyes roaring black and red with the veins standing out around them. Hide couldn't recognize him as anyone he knew, which meant there was no mercy for him and his adrenaline kicked back up again.

"Watch out!" He cried when the Ghoul lunged at Akira. Amon jumped out of the way, pulling Akira with him but they were too slow and she was launched towards Hide as she was struck.

Hide just caught her though the force threw him off balance and together they fell to the ground. Amon was back on his feet and firing his weapon at the ghoul who hardly took any damage and instead stalked towards Amon with fiery determination. Hide panicked and looked around -- just a few inches away lay a briefcase. Akira was still awake and he left her to snatch the briefcase away and quickly opened it up, finding a long whip inside with a dagger at the end.

_Her Quinque!_

"Mado-san! Here!"

He threw the weapon to her and she regained her footing, changing her stance so she could properly wield it. By now, the ghoul had slashed Amon a few times, forcing him against a wall where he was separated from his own weapon. With a sweeping strike and a booming crack, the whip slashed the ghoul's arm clean off. He screamed in agony; the tables were turning. Akira struck, again and again, creating large gashes in the ghoul and removing an entire leg, giving Amon time to gather his own weapon -- he pulled a staff from his briefcase and it transformed into an enormous, blunt cylinder on one end. With the two of them armed, they were able to subdue the ghoul efficiently.

Hide watched from his spot in the corner. Though the ghoul had been monstrous with a murderous intent clear in his actions, now he was reduced to a pleading, busted mess. Amon spared no mercy and brought his weapon down on the ghoul's head, crushing it and sending blood spattering everywhere. Image of his night at the restaurant came rushing back to when Tsukiyama had torn off the man's head and dropped it into the thick pool of blood; bile was threatening at the back of his throat. With the fight over, Amon and Akira stood in front of Hide.

"Do you see what we mean now? This is no place for a civilian." Akira spoke firmly, but upon seeing Hide in his near-catatonic state, she softened.

"But...you did help me. Thank you." Her hand extended out to him and Hide broke out from his phase, studying the hand before him and the woman it belonged to. Gingerly he took it and stood up with her help.

"You need to leave before more of them come," Amon stated. "Will you be able to find your way back?"

Hide nodded simply.

"Then get going."

The pair rushed off down the long hallway and Hide left the opposite way and back out the window he had entered. He had just witnessed a brutal killing and though the investigators were human, he couldn't help but think of how similar they were to Tsukiyama that night he was taken. He realized then the ghouls would be shown no mercy. Desperate and afraid, Hide retreated back to the woods where he hoped to find Yoshimura and the rest. He needed to do something. Anything. He couldn't fight or even defend himself, but he couldn't bring himself to just sit around at home either, not when his friends and Kaneki were drowning in the middle of all this.

"Please don't die. Please be safe."

Over and over, the gore he had been subjected to replayed in his mind and he pictured the same thing happening to his friends. As he hurried through the brush of the woods, his breathing was near impossible from his hyperventilating, his nose was stuffy with mucus and his eyes burned from his tears. He couldn't rid himself of the images no matter how hard he tried, but he pushed on in hopes of finding someone who could help.

_Please don't leave me, Kaneki. Please be safe._


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHEW, ANOTHER CHAPTER DONE~~  
> So, as you notice, this says chapter 10/13. BUT, there is actually only ONE. CHAPTER. LEFT. Then the epilogue, and then an extra chapter/alternate ending I came up with.  
> CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS IS ALMOST DONE?! Ahhhh!!  
> Big thanks to everyone who subscribed, liked, commented, shared -- you are all amazing and I am so happy I was able to share my love of Tokyo Ghoul with all of you. This fandom might be old BUT WE'RE STILL KICKING!
> 
> I'll see you all in the next chapter! Much love! <3

_Keep going. Keep going. Don't stop._

Every breath was a chore for Hide and his throat protested the more parched it became, but he didn't stop. He _couldn't_ stop, not when everyone else was risking their lives for his mate.

"Yoshimura?!" He yelled into the thickness of the forest. His gut told him to keep his mouth shut before he gave his position away, but he was so tired and so drained from the night, he felt it was all he had the strength for before passing out.

"Yoshimura-san?! Are you here?!"

"Hide-kun!"

His ears perked and he stopped, looking around himself until he saw the old man waving him over. Relief swept over him and he stumbled over, smiling when he saw Hinami beside him.

"Onii-san!" She cried, pulling him into a tight embrace.

"Where--where's Uta?" He asked breathlessly.

"Not sure, he left a while ago. Are you okay, Hide-kun? What happened?"

Hide shook his head -- he couldn't bring himself to relive the moment.

"I'm fine."

"How's the baby?"

Hide's hand dropped to his stomach, "It's okay, the baby is safe."

 _The baby. My baby._ He shook with a sudden chill at the proclamation.

"Good." Yoshimura smiled and relaxed instantly.

In their hidden spot in the forest, an eerie silence fell over them. No gunshots, no explosions, no cries of fear -- just silence. Collectively, the group looked to the battered complex down in the valley and tensed at the unexpected quiet.

"There's something in the air. A very strong Ghoul is here." Hinami whispered and Hide looked at her quizzically.

"What do you mean? How can you tell?" The silence was creepy, no doubt, but he couldn't feel any sort of presence that she mentioned.

"Hide-kun, there's something I should tell you," Yoshimura said suddenly. "When I was young, I fell in love with a beautiful woman. She was Human."

Hide's eyes went wide, but he listened carefully.

"I loved her very, very much and we -- we had a child. I couldn't believe it at first when she told me, I was so scared she would die. But she carried the baby to term."

In the distance, a low, bellowing roar echoed throughout the air, shaking Hide to his very core and instilling terror inside him. He looked at the source and saw a foreboding creature rising up on the roof of the building. His jaw dropped in sheer horror.

"Hide-kun, look at me." Yoshimura's hands cupped Hide's face and he was forced to face him.

"That baby -- she is still alive today. My daughter is _alive_ , Hide, living as both Ghoul and Human."

Hide's earlier suspicions were true; Yoshimura wasn't half-Human, but he was the father of one. To hear the truth out in the open made Hide's dwindled hope rekindle.

"I'm telling you because I want your baby to live. Fight for it, Hide, no matter what it takes. You hear me?"

"Y-yes, Yoshimura-san. I'll fight for it. I promise."

"Good man. You and Kaneki-kun will be good fathers. I know it. Now...stay here with Hinami, keep her safe."

Yoshimura rose from his spot, smiling down remorsefully at Hide. Hinami crept in closer to Hide's side and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders like a protective brother as they watched him hurry off.

"Keep them safe!" He called out one last time.

"Yes! I will!" Hide called back.

"Where's he going, Onii-san?" Hinami uttered quietly.

"I think...he's going to see his daughter."

From their concealed spot in the trees, they watched Yoshimura disappear into the distance. The CCG battled the towering creature on the roof and deep down, Hide's heart ached for Yoshimura and the pain he felt.

* * *

Solitude. Remorse. Heartache. _Peace._

Is this what Kaneki was feeling? Peace? Standing in the middle of the large, open room, he peered down at the broken body of Yamori. His tough and sinewy kagune left an unpleasant taste in Kaneki's mouth, but it kept Yamori from healing and sent a surge of insurmountable strength coursing through his tired and weary body. His torturer was finally defeated -- the Doves would soon flock to their location and find his abuser left to their mercy; Kaneki felt no desire to kill him, not even for the unspeakable crimes he had committed to his very soul. The CCG would be enough for him.

As he walked away, Yamori screamed at him to finish the job, begged him not to let the CCG get their hold on him, but Kaneki felt no remorse or pity for the crazed Ghoul.

Perhaps this is what peace felt like.

Slowly, his cries faded and Kaneki found himself outside. The dirt felt cool and gritty on his feet, the wind blowing through his hair and up his tattered shirt to wick away the beads of sweat; the night was cold, but Kaneki felt nothing. How could he, after all the unimaginable pain he went through? A mere chill was nothing compared to having his toes cut off over and over...and over.

_1000\. 993. 986. 979. 972._

"Kaneki!!"

When he snapped out of his chant, he found himself in a park lit up by street lights and looked up to see Touka and Nishiki running his way.

"Yo, Kaneki...what happened?" Nishiki asked hesitantly.

"We saw you leave and followed you. What happened to Yamori?" Touka looked him up and down, clearly concerned with his appearance. Did he really look that bad?

"The CCG has him. That's all that matters." He spoke plainly, uninterested. "Are you two okay?"

"We're fine. Took some time to get out of there, but we're okay." Nishiki reported. Kaneki had never seen him looking so tired and worn out before.

"Kaneki-kun!!"

Another familiar voice called out to him and he saw a tall man with a spiral beard walking along with Tsukiyama. Instantly, Hide came to mind and his heart accelerated with worry.

"Where's Hide?"

"He's safe at this place, we wouldn't let him come." Touka confirmed.

"You left him alone?"

"He insisted! Besides, you needed our help. He's fine, Kaneki, I swear--"

"Kaneki-kun. It's my pleasure to see you again." Tsukiyama interrupted as he neared the group.

"Tsukiyama-san..." Kaneki greeted coldly.

"Touka-kun is correct about your mate. He is safe, I can assure you."

Kaneki looked at him doubtfully. He wanted to believe Hide was safe, but he wasn't a fool to trust a former enemy so easily.

"Because I pledged myself to him, just like I will do with you." He lowered onto one knee as if he were about to be knighted by the Queen of England.

"Kaneki Ken, I pledge to be faithful, loyal, and forever at your side as you see fit to use me. You have proven to be encroiable in every way, and I wish to align myself with someone such as yourself."

Kaneki stood motionless for a moment while contemplating. During his confinement, he had come to accept certain parts of himself he had tried so hard to ignore. He was a Human, but also a Ghoul; he could no longer deny this. It meant he represented both species -- he would fight for the two alike, not pick a side and ignore an entire half of himself. To do this, he would need allies. Friends. Perhaps, Tsukiyama was one such ally he needed.

"Fine. I accept your terms. But I won't forgive you for what you did to Hide."

"Understood. I'll do my best to prove my worth to you." Tsukiyama rose from his spot and joined Kaneki by his side.

"Kaneki?" Banjou spoke up now. He was much more quiet and reserved than before, the pain of losing close friends taking its toll on him.

"I'm Banjou Kazuichi. I met your friends at Anteiku. Hide, too. I can also promise his safety to you and...I'd like to join you, as well."

Relieved, Kaneki nodded. He didn't know much of Banjou, but if Touka trusted him then it was enough.

"Thank you, Banjou. I need allies for the plans I have. I want to become stronger. I..."

An image of Hide, his mother, Hinami, Touka, and all his friends came to mind. He clenched his hands at his sides, frustrated at the old scars that throbbed in his heart from the painful memories.

"I want to be able to protect my friends. I can't do that alone. There are things I need to do. Things that _need_ to be done. I'll need all the help I can get."

"Then I'm coming, too." Touka exclaimed with a smile on her face.

She was so beautiful when she smiled, her eyes crinkling from behind her fringe when her cheeks rose and Kaneki admired her youthful determination.

"No, Touka. Your entrance exams are coming up, right?"

Her smile faded and Kaneki felt a pang of guilt.

"You need to study for them. Get into a good university, get a good career. Focus on that, okay?"

"Screw all that stuff! I want to come with you. Please?"

Kaneki shook his head calmly and she sighed in defeat.

"We'll see each other again. I promise."

As the group spoke amongst themselves, the screech of a bicycle caught everyone's attention -- behind them on the path stood Hide on his bicycle with one foot on the ground to balance him while Hinami stood at his side.

"Hide?" Kaneki whispered far too low for anyone to hear. His chest soared when he saw him breathing, _living_ , unharmed.

Smiling, Hide pedaled over until he was close enough to hop off his bike, ignoring it as it toppled over onto the ground. Without any hesitation, Hide pulled Kaneki into his arms and all his pain, his worries, his fears, simply disappeared into nothingness. He inhaled Hide's musky, sweet scent deep into his lungs, letting it fill his chest with a warmth and love only his Omega could provide.

"I missed you so much." Hide whispered against his neck, making his skin tickle. His strong arms pulled Kaneki closer and he returned the embrace in hopes of conveying all his deepest emotions to him. He didn't ever want to let him go, not again, but then--

"Onii-san!" Hinami cheered and Kaneki reluctantly pulled away, allowing Hinami to wrap her arms around his waist as she hugged him tightly.

"Hinami-chan, you're safe."

"Of course. Onii-san was protecting me!" She looked to Hide who rubbed the back of his head awkwardly.

"I think you did most of the protecting, Hinami-chan." He said with a smile.

"Isn't it weird to call both of them 'Onii-san', Hinami?" Nishiki asked with a slight hint of disgust in his tone.

"It's not! They're both my Onii-sans and they're going to give me Onii-chan!"

She switched to hugging Hide defensively and the group all snickered, deciding it was best to ignore the logistics of it.

"Hey, weren't you supposed to stay at home?" Nishiki suddenly scolded.

"I know, Senpai. I'm sorry. I couldn't stand by knowing you guys were putting your lives at risk, y'know? And Kaneki..."

Hide reached his hand out to him and Kaneki gladly took it. He wasn't pleased Hide had risked his life, but he was safe in the end, that's all that mattered.

"I just had to try."

"Yeah, well you should take your time saying goodbye. He's going to be leaving soon."

"What? Leaving?" Hide looked puzzled while Kaneki shot an annoyed look to Nishiki, who ducked his head and tightened his lips -- he had said way too much, way too soon.

"What do you mean you're leaving?" Hide's hand dropped and Kaneki was overcome with a sudden loneliness as if he had just been abandoned.

"Hide, I'm sorry. I -- Look, can we talk about this? At home? Come on, let's go home." Desperate, he reached his hand out again and of course, Hide interlaced their fingers together.

They stopped so Hide could grab his bike, keeping their hands together, then began walking towards Hide's campus across the city. It would have been easier to just leave the bike and let Kaneki carry him home, but this way they had more time to talk and enjoy each other's long overdue company.

"Hey! Kaneki!" Touka called and he looked back over his shoulder at her.

"I'll see you later, okay?"

Kaneki smiled and nodded. It pained him to leave Touka behind -- she had been such a good friend to he and Hide both, but he wanted her to have a normal life. She was educated and beautiful, she deserved to be happy.

Over the course of their walk, they stuck to the back streets to keep out of sight due to Kaneki's ragged looks. The streets were quiet in the darkness of the late night and Hide often rested his head on Kaneki's shoulder as they walked, commenting on his strong Alpha scent and how it calmed him down. Kaneki agreed, inhaling Hide's scent through his thick hair and feeling at ease almost instantly. They didn't talk about the pregnancy, or the kidnapping, or the torture. In fact, most of the walk was silent and when they did talk it was of normal things like exams, people, celebrities, and T.V. shows. It was the most normal Kaneki had felt since his accident.

Almost an hour later they were finally on campus. Hide locked up his bike and together they headed for his dorm.

"I love you. I hope you know that." Hide said quietly when they reached his door. "I love you so much I can barely stand it."

His hand reached up into Kaneki's now glistening white hair, his eyes boring deep into Kaneki's. Kaneki covered his hand with his palm, tilting his head into the curve of it.

"I love you, too Hide. I'm sorry it took me so long to say it. Being apart from you was the worst thing I had to endure."

Hide could only imagine what Kaneki had been through, but he understood it was gruesome enough to physically alter him. Normally he knew just what to say to comfort others, it was something that always came naturally to him, but now...he was lost. There was nothing that could be said to fix what had happened, so he did the only thing he could think of; he pulled Kaneki close and brought their lips together for a light, yet passionate kiss. They sighed into their kiss, pulling away for only a moment to examine the other, each looking for consent to continue on. Again, Hide pulled him in, letting himself be pushed back against the door while his hands roamed over his sculpted back under his dark shirt. Kaneki leaned into Hide, their kiss becoming deeper as their tongues slid together and a new, fiery heat began to flicker inside him.

"Kaneki," Hide whispered hotly between their kiss, "your scent. It's so heavy."

With a sudden surge of dominance, Kaneki's hands planted themselves on the door by Hide's head and he pushed into their kiss more so Hide couldn't speak. He was right, though, the air around them was thick with their scent and it made his head feel light.

"Something's wrong with me," Kaneki uttered, switching his kisses to Hide's neck and behind his ear.

"Haah -- I know what it is. Come inside."

Hide fumbled with his keys as he hurried to unlock the door, then ushered them both inside; Kaneki slammed the door shut behind him and attacked Hide, pushing him down to the floor as they kissed. Quickly, they helped each other strip off their clothing then began mouthing at the other's skin, leaving light marks behind as they trailed over it. Kaneki stuck to his shoulders while Hide favoured his collarbones, undoing his pants at the same time.

"C'mere," he demanded while pulling at Kaneki's hips. Kaneki followed until he was straddling Hide's head and watched with hooded eyes as his cock was dragged out from his underwear.

"Hide..."

With their eyes locked on each other, Hide took his cock into his mouth, suctioning his lips around the smooth head while the flat of his tongue rubbed against the tip. Kaneki trembled from the pleasure, his eyelids fluttering closed so he could focus.  Just when he thought he was feeling the best of it, Hide's mouth became insatiably wet and took more of him in until he could feel the soft back of his throat. He felt Hide gag and looked down in worry only to regret it instantly -- Hide was okay, more than okay in fact, he had closed his eyes and was now bobbing his head back and forth as he sucked on Kaneki's hard erection. His cheeks were flushed red, his lips swollen and wet, and Kaneki felt his orgasm rise quicker than he could anticipate.

"Ngh!!" He groaned, cumming into Hide's mouth in large spurts. His cock pulsed as Hide sucked it back and he nibbled on his lower lip from the feeling. When he finished, he slid to the side so Hide could sit up, then watched guiltily as Hide spat his cum out into his palm.

"I'm sorry! It was so fast!"

"Hah, it's fine, babe. I don't mind. I was going to swallow it, but then, you know...the baby..."

 _The baby._ It wasn't a secret anymore. Awkwardly, Hide got up from the floor and headed to the kitchen to wash his hands. When he returned, Kaneki snuggled up to him, this time gently guiding him down onto the floor so he could lay on top. They lazily kissed for a moment, ignoring the salty taste they now shared, then Kaneki spoke up.

"Are you really...pregnant?" He asked hesitantly.

"Yeah." Hide swallowed hard. "That's what my tests say, anyway. But maybe it's a fluke, y'know?"

"Then...we should take care of that." He uttered, dropping down to Hide's nipple and sucking back on it hard just how he knew he liked while his fingers undid his jeans.

"Ah!" Hide cried, his head rolling back against the floor. "Wha--what do you mean 'take care of it'?"

Kaneki bit down on his nipple sharply, then soothed the flushed bud with the tip of his tongue before kissing it. Satisfied with his mark, he slid up Hide's body, rubbing their torsos together, and whispered hotly in his ear.

"I'll make sure you get pregnant after tonight."

When he pulled away, there was a light in Kaneki's eyes Hide had never seen before; it excited him down to his core and he shook with trepidation, feeling the hair on the back of his neck rise. Kaneki dipped down again, pulling Hide's pants and underwear down over his ankles before tossing them away; his cock stood fully erect, flushed, and pink, ready for whatever was to come. Eagerly, Kaneki sucked on two of his fingers until they were dripping with drool, then leaned over with his ass in the air; while his mouth took Hide's dick, his fingers slid between his thighs and pushed inside him right down to his knuckles.

"Uhn! Fuck!" Hide cried out, his hands burying into Kaneki's hair while he breathed through the mix of pleasure and pain.

Being in heat made this process so much easier to handle, but being pregnant meant Hide would no longer go into heat until after the baby was born. Considering Kaneki was currently in rut he was grateful he was receiving any sort of preparation at all; most Alphas were violent during their rut, so if the worst Kaneki was going to do was rush his prep a little bit, he didn't mind putting up with the stinging burn of it all.

"Kaneki. Kaneki." He chanted. "Fuck, you feel so good, baby."

His thighs fell flat on the floor and Kaneki wiggled in closer. He slurped loudly as he sucked, overcoming the sound of his fingers schlucking in and out of Hide's tight hole. Hurriedly, he put another finger inside and Hide's back arched from being so stretched out. As they wriggled inside they grazed his prostate, sending jolts of shock that made his muscles jerk. Hide babbled mindlessly, losing himself in the pleasure Kaneki gave him and Kaneki savoured how his name sounded falling from his lover's lips -- he could die happily listening to it non-stop.

Hide reached behind him for his nightstand, stretching out his taught abs for Kaneki to admire before fetching the bottle of lube.

"Baby I need it. Hurry, please!"

Kaneki stood up on his knees and rubbed his lips clean with the back of his arm. Standing tall, his muscles were defined and sleek, his pecs rounded and his abs coming to meet perfectly at his pelvis. Though it wasn't thick, his erection was long and jutted proudly from his hips and Hide shivered knowing it was about to be buried inside him. Kaneki prepared his cock with the lubrication while Hide hooked his arms under his knees to pull back his legs for Kaneki; Kaneki remained standing on his knees and dipped his hips low until he was pressing against Hide. Wordlessly, he entered slowly at first, listening to Hide's groan ring in the small room, then smoothly pushed ahead until he was fully seated inside. He grabbed Hide's legs from him, keeping them bent so his thighs touched his waist and gave him only a moment to adjust before pulling back.

"Oh god! Kaneki!"

"Ngh, Hide..." he uttered as he sunk into him again.

Hide's hand wove through his hair while his other stroked his cock; his eyes were closed and moans dripped from his mouth like honey. Hide was the embodiment of lust and it drove Kaneki wild to see his lover so endowed with beauty as he thrust into him. His hips kicked up their pace, making his body rub against the hard floor; Kaneki was lost in his ecstasy as every touch and sound drove his pleasure even higher than he thought it could go; but, he needed to be closer to Hide, needed to _feel_ even more of him.

Pausing, he hoisted Hide up easily until he fell forward in his lap. Hide grunted from Kaneki shoving into the deepest parts of him and his eyes lolled back from how full he felt. With his hands on Kaneki's shoulders, he rode him in time with Kaneki's thrusts. Their lips met in the middle, echoing their sounds of pleasure with loud, wet smacking. Kaneki kept one arm around his waist while the other slid down his chest to tweak his nipples; Hide sobbed from the sinful pleasure, smiling with two of his fingertips resting on his teeth while riding Kaneki even harder.

"Fuck, fuck! So -- good! Uhn!"

"Hide. I'm -- so -- happy!" Kaneki cried, capturing Hide's lips with his own as tears leaked over his cheeks.

"I'm so happy you're pregnant." He whispered.

Hide, with his hands grasping Kaneki's head, brought their foreheads together, panting heavily from the exertion his poor, tired body was going through.

"Me -- too. So -- ah! -- so happy!"

"Turn around. I need to mark you." He growled.

At those very words, Hide's heart burst with elation -- he was finally going to be marked by Kaneki; it was something he had been waiting for since he first presented as Omega. Happily, he allowed Kaneki to guide him so he was bending over the edge of the bed and began working at his cursed leather collar so he could expose his neck. But Kaneki was suddenly very quiet, too quiet, and he looked back to see what was wrong.

"Kaneki? You okay?"

Behind him, Kaneki was on his knees, his hands on Hide's hips, but his eyes were focused on his lower back. His hand ghosted over his skin to the V-shaped scab that burned into his skin; guilt and sorrow overwhelmed Hide as Kaneki's tears flowed seamlessly now, dripping off his chin and onto Hide's skin.

"Tsukiyama did this to you?" He struggled to ask.

"Um...yes, and no. It was...Lady Valesquez who ordered it. She has all her slaves marked." Hide whispered. Her name left his lips like slime, making his stomach flip when he remembered all she had done to him. He tried his best to hold back his tears.

"I'm so sorry, Hide. I should have been there for you."

Kaneki bent down over him, wrapping his arms around Hide's shoulders and pressing his face into his back as he quietly sobbed. Hide reached over to him, placing his hand over his.

"Shh, it's okay. I'm okay. _We're_ okay now. Don't cry."

"I'm never going to let this happen again." Kaneki sniffed and wiped his tears away with his arm before nuzzling into the crook of Hide's neck.

"I'll make sure...everyone knows you're mine."

Suddenly, Kaneki bit through the thick leather of Hide's collar as if it were nothing more than a leaf and it fell from Hide's neck onto the bed. Kaneki spat out the piece he bit off, then guided himself to re-enter Hide; Hide groaned and threw his head back, but was pushed forward into the mattress. Kaneki's thick tongue licked up his nape before being followed by a blunt yet sharp pain that radiated down his spine and up into his skull. Hide screamed and forced his hands into the bed; while Kaneki bit down, his hips jerked back and forth, fucking Hide fervently as he left his mark on him.

After the searing pain was over, Kaneki licked at his mark to lap up the blood that flowed from the wound; he was no longer afraid of losing himself to his hunger. Hide lay motionless on the bed, moaning from the soothing coolness of his tongue. Tears formed at the corners of his eyes, but he was _happy_ , so happy from finally receiving his Alpha's mark he didn't even notice he had cummed all over the side of the bed.

"Shit! Hide, Hide!"

Keeping Hide tightly held against him, Kaneki emptied himself into his willing body. The heat inside exploded within him, igniting his nerves and sending a warming wave throughout his body right down to his toes. Their scent wafted through the air, filling the apartment with the smell of flowers on a summer breeze. It was only Hide who could make him feel this way and he would cherish every lasting moment he had with him to keep in his memories forever.

"More." Hide asked wearily. "Don't stop."

"I won't, I'm right here."

Kaneki helped Hide onto the bed so he was laying on his side with Kaneki lying in front of him. Slowly, lovingly, they kissed, their hands stroking over the other's body, remembering every dip and curve while they rested for another round.

* * *

It was quarter-past three by now and the peaceful silence of the city had seeped its way into Hide's room. He slept peacefully beside Kaneki who sat on the edge of the bed, now fully dressed and peering down at Hide with remorse. Kaneki had left his mark on him ten times over -- on his thighs, his butt, his shoulders -- anywhere that had a chance to be seen. Now, he regretted causing Hide so much pain, but in the moment even Hide was begging for him to leave his mark "so everyone will know who I belong to", as he put it.

It was an odd thing, being an Alpha after years of growing up as Omega. People respected and admired him, Hide was more submissive and he now had a mate and a _child_ to be responsible for. But...he had another calling, one he knew he couldn't ignore and with a heavy heart, he kissed Hide one last time on his cheek, then rose from the bed.

"Forgive me, Hide." He whispered, then left out the door.

...

Hide kept his eyes closed even as his tears poured freely from them, gripping his pillow tightly with both hands. He knew there was nothing he could say or do to keep Kaneki from leaving, but that fact only made him hurt more.

_Kaneki. You're so selfish. Please back soon._


	11. Chapter 11

_One Day Later_

The room was bristling cold from the stormy weather outside seeping in through the window; Hide bundled up the blankets to his bare, shivering body. He could get up for a hot shower, make a decent breakfast and maybe even some tea, but he refused to open his eyes. He refused to acknowledge the empty space next to him, the one that _should_ be occupied, but wasn't. Earlier, he had stuck his arm out, hopeful that maybe, just maybe, Kaneki had chosen to stay; instead, he was greeted by cold and wrinkled sheets, sealing his heartbreak.

Like day-old cologne clinging to his body, he could still feel Kaneki's warmth and he remained still in his lonesome bed in fear of shaking the feeling away; but then his stomach was churning, his mouth wet with bile and drool.

"Not again." He groaned.

In a flurry the sheets were thrown off him and he hurried to the bathroom, gripping the toilet for dear life as he hurled the contents of his stomach. Just as he finished and his stomach settled, an entirely different rumbling sound erupted from his aching body -- he was definitely going to need a shower this morning.

The hot water filled the small bathroom with steam within minutes. He washed the grime and dirt off his body, remembering the night before and the terrors he witnessed. Heads crushed, blood spatter, the smell of wet dirt, the sound of screams and roars -- it all seemed like a nightmare now, one that would stick with Hide forever. Then there was Kaneki. His gentle caress, his whispering voice, his soft lips on Hide's skin. Absently, Hide's fingertips ghosted over his shoulder where Kaneki left a bite mark, then over the one on the back of his neck, his chest, and even...his thighs. His spine tingled with a pleasant chill of the seemingly-distant memory.

Kaneki was gone. Hide couldn't say confidently he would ever return, but he tucked away his hope deep inside his heart where his fondest memories were kept safe. His fingers dropped to his stomach -- the last remnant of Kaneki's presence. Hide needed to keep it safe, he needed to see this through for Kaneki's sake. Their baby was a gift from Kaneki, from _his_ Alpha, and as an Omega it was Hide's duty to ensure its health and safety. To do that, he needed money.

After his shower, Hide dressed and set himself in front of his computer, searching for part-time jobs that appealed to student life.

"Something simple, something simple, something--"

He gasped, an idea coming to mind but it seemed too far-fetched to actually work. His fingers typed into the search bar and his screen lit-up.

_**Interested in working with the Commission of Counter Ghoul? Apply today!** _

Sure enough, there was a part-time job available for an office assistant. It was flexible with hours and the requirements were so simple anyone could apply; the idea of working with the CCG even though he had a half-Ghoul mate, Ghoul friends, and potentially a Ghoul child was far too tempting to pass up. This way, he could easily keep tabs on Kaneki while also providing information to his friends at Anteiku. Within an hour, Hide had something of a resume and cover letter done up and he hit "apply".

_5 Weeks_

"I still can't believe you're working with the CCG." Touka said as she washed the leftover dishes from the night before. Hide sat at the bar, sipping on his decaf iced coffee.

"You know if they ever find out -- and they will -- they'll have you tried and killed within a day."

"I'm smarter than I look and I know how to be careful. There's no way they'll find me out. Right, Koma-san?"

At the bar stood Koma Enji, a shorter, bulkier man with a rounded nose and pompadour hairstyle. He was in the midst of brewing a fresh pot of coffee for the morning customers when Hide called to him.

"Of course, I have complete faith in you, Hide."

"Pfft, I'm going to quote you on that when you're scrambling to me for help." Mocked Touka.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Anyway, I better get going. Almost nine already, damn."

As he stood up from the barstool his back ached in protest. He had fallen out of his active lifestyle, leaving his joints aching as if he were already in his senior years.

"Hey, you doing okay? How's the baby?" Touka asked suddenly.

"What baby? It's only been a month, it doesn't even have organs yet. I looked it up, y'know." Hide stated matter-of-factly while rubbing his belly in circles.

"Oi, Irimi-san. What do you think, am I showing yet?"

Irimi Kaya, a tall, slender woman with sleek black hair that parted down the middle looked up from cleaning tables. Hide stood sideways, lifting his shirt up with one hand to expose his flat belly.

"Hardly. You sure you're pregnant?"

"Better be after all this."

He sipped up the last of his coffee and started to leave.

"Hey! You didn't pay yet. You getting pregnancy brain already?"

"Ugh, don't hassle me, harpy."

"Harpy?!"

Laughing, Hide dodged the washcloth Touka threw and tossed his change onto the table, then scurried out of the cafe. The train ride to the 1st ward was quick and Hide was able to make it to work right on time for nine, meaning he was actually late.

He fell into routine easily, sorting the mail and handing it out to the various investigators, taking coffee orders and doing the regular morning coffee run. He got along well enough with pretty much everyone and since he was seen as a "part-time student assistant", no one paid him any mind, making it easy to rifle through paperwork and files. The more classified stuff, however, was much harder to come by; he was never allowed to handle those files as they were always delivered by higher-up staff. He knew if there was any mention of Kaneki, or "Eyepatch" as he was nicknamed, it would be in those files. However, Hide was a patient man and believed all good things came to those who wait and sure enough, today was the day he would be rewarded.

"Hide-kun," Mado Akira called out to him suddenly in the middle of mail delivery. "The Chairman wants to speak with you."

_Oh fuck. They found me out._

Hide obediently followed Akira, a woman he had come to admire over the past month due to her hard work and professional attitude. She and Amon accompanied him to speak with the Chairman, an older gentleman who had been the reigning leader of the CCG for years now.

"Hide-kun, I understand you have been with us for over a month now, correct?"

"Yes, sir."

"I hear you're a hard worker. People seem to like you, is that right?"

"I...suppose? I have not heard any complaints yet and I do my best to get along with everyone."

"Hm...tell me, how's school going? What are you studying? Do you like it?"

_This is weird, did he call me here just to chat?_

"Uh...international studies, and school is fine, sir. Thank you for asking. Not to be rude, but may I ask why I was summoned?"

"Hey, kid! Be more respectful!" Amon corrected, but was quickly hushed by the Chairman.

"Koutaru-san, please settle yourself. Nagachika-kun, a while ago you had a run-in with Mado-san and Koutaru-san. Do you remember?"

The harsh sound of crushing bone echoed in his memories.

"Yes, sir, I remember. It was during a raid on a Ghoul lair. The...Aogiri Tree, right?" He knew better, of course, but he couldn't let that on.

"Mado-san told me about how you helped her during the fight and since then, I have been thinking of you. We need more investigators, more people with passion and good hearts. I believe you are one of those people."

"Chairman, are you saying--" Amon started.

"Nagachika Hideyoshi, I am promoting you to a Dove Investigator of the CCG. I want you to work for me full-time."

The breath was swept from Hide's lungs and he stood in awe -- was he actually just offered to be an investigator? If he accepted, he would have access to more classified files, meaning he might actually be able to keep track of Kaneki.

"Chairman, with all due respect, he's just a kid. He isn't fit to be an investigator." Amon argued. Akira stood quietly by him, contemplating.

"Well, then I'll assign him to your team so you can personally oversee his development. How does that sound?" He spoke to Hide now -- not only would he be an investigator, but he'd be with the team who was investigating Kaneki. The irony of it all, of the famed Eyepatch's mate joining the very team attempting to hunt him down had Hide ready to burst out laughing.

"I accept. Thank you very much, Mr. Chairman, I won't let you down."

With a deep bow from his hips, Hide took his leave with Akira and Amon who was still reeling from the situation. Hide couldn't wait to tell Touka.

_26 Weeks_

"Are you nervous?" Hinami asked.

"For what? This is only the millionth time I've seen the doctor. Everything will be fine." Hide answered while licking away at his rocky road ice cream.

"I've never seen someone each so much ice cream in one day. Isn't that your third one?" Touka commented slyly.

"Listen here, when you're waddling around with your first baby you'll understand the joy and comforts a simple ice cream cone can bring. Until then, shut it."

Hinami giggled amusedly.

"Idiot, you know I don't eat ice cream."

"Well...whatever the Ghoul equivalent of ice cream is, that's what you'll be eating."

Heavy footsteps stomped up the staircase of the cafe and all but Hide stiffened. The doctor, a short man with black hair and a receding hairline, entered the room with Yoshimura at his side.

"Hello, Hide-kun. How are you today?"

"Fine, as usual." He answered, licking away the last of his ice cream before biting into the cone.

"Cravings getting worse?"

"Not worse, just more frequent I guess."

"That's his third one today."

"Touka!"

The doctor smiled as the two bickered and set his leather bag down on the coffee table.

"Today I need some tests done. I'll need a urine test," he set down a clear plastic cup on the table.

"Some blood tests," needles, alcohol swabs, and a rubber tourniquet were placed beside the cup.

"And a weight." He looked to Hinami who happily jumped up to fetch the scale from the bathroom, a new addition since Hide's pregnancy.

While Hide got up onto the scale, he answered simple questions about his general well-being; his nausea had finally gone away, he felt tired but not exhausted, he was having difficulty falling asleep but usually stayed asleep when he did, and he found himself eating everything and anything, given the chance. Sure enough, his weight had increased. _Again._ He sighed as he stepped off the scale and inspected himself -- his hips were soft now, bearing an extra inch of fat and he was sure his butt had grown, too. Not only that, but his face felt rounder and he was sure his arms weren't this flabby before. He rubbed his baby bump as he thought on his weight gain, unaware of Touka's longing gaze towards his stomach.

"Weight gain is to be expected, but if it bothers you try to eat healthier. Three ice cream cones a day isn't going to help."

Now Touka was snickering and Hide shot her an annoyed look. After the questions, Hide gave him the urine sample in the plastic cup inside a plastic bag, then sat through the blood collection. Vial after vial was filled and Hide worried the old man would drain everything from him, but then it was done and he sat back in relief holding the soft cotton ball to his arm.

"Doctor, did you get the results back from the last blood test? About the RC cells?"

The room was quiet. The first blood tests showed none, but the doctor stated since Kaneki was only half-Ghoul it could take time for the cells to form. By the fourth month, they would know for sure.

"Yes, actually. Let me just find my papers here..." He opened up Hide's file from his leather bag and sifted through the limited paperwork, 'aha'ing when he found the page he was looking for.

"Here they are. Okay, your RC cell count was..."

Hide, Hinami, and Touka all waited with baited breaths. Behind the doctor, even Yoshimura stood stiffly as he waited to hear.

"Oh. Hmm, it looks like..."

Hide released a relieved sigh -- he knew all along. If only Kaneki were here to hear this.

_32 Weeks_

Working with the CCG proved to be almost fruitless. Hide learned quite a bit about Ghouls, including his friends at Anteiku, but as it turns out the CCG were just as clueless to Kaneki's whereabouts as he was. However, there were things he knew about Kaneki that the CCG could never know, such as his favourite author, Takasuki Sen, who just so happened to be doing a signing today at the mall. No matter what Kaneki was up to, there was no way he would miss this.

Hide stepped away from the urinal and washed his hands, keeping his now very obvious baby bump away from the counter -- it was tough to resist leaning against it when his back was crying out for relief. Just as he dried his hands a sharp pain shot up his spine and he gripped the counter to keep himself from collapsing; folding his baggy sweater over his belly, he saw tiny hands pushing outward against his skin, which meant the baby was kicking against his spine.

"You brat," he said, rubbing his back and over the healed 'V' scar to soothe the pain away, "why you gotta hurt your dad like this?"

The door opened suddenly and Hide was hit with a sudden embarrassment -- the man who walked in was plain-looking enough with barely any scent to go along with him, meaning he was probably a Beta; his eyes darted to Hide's stomach and though he made no expression, Hide could sense his distaste. There was an awkward silence between them and Hide covered his stomach with his hoody and straightened. Pregnant males weren't common, mostly due to Japan's negative view of homosexuals -- they were treated like a public secret. Gays were fine as long as they kept to themselves, so for Hide to be pregnant he might as well be wearing rainbow coveralls and preaching gay sex to everyone he met, which meant many in the public looked down on him.

He pushed on anyway, ignoring the looks people gave him. Today he was on a mission and nothing was going to deter him. Before leaving, he pulled out a small vial of liquid -- it was a scent dampener -- if there was a chance of spotting Kaneki today his scent would give Hide away within seconds, so he applied a few drops to his neck and inner wrists, massaging the fluid into his skin before stepping out from his second trip to the bathroom since being at the mall. He headed for the bookstore where Takasuki was waiting for her loyal fans, choosing to hide behind a corner so he could scout out the crowd. After about an hour of waiting the elevator bell dinged, opening to reveal...an older woman in a tight pencil skirt and blouse, a couple young men, and a mother with her child. Hide sighed. His knees were cramping, his back pain worsening and an overall feeling he was ready for his midday nap.

Pregnancy was really dampening his detective skills.

* * *

Three more hours, a bathroom trip, another dosing of scent dampener, and a risky detour to the cafeteria later, there was still no sign of Kaneki. It was aready five o'clock and the signing would be over soon. Maybe Kaneki wasn't going to come afterall?

_**BZZT, BZZT** _

A phone call, probably from work. Looking at the screen on his cellphone, his suspicions were confirmed as the name 'Amon' flashed across.

"Amon-san, what's up?" Hide answered casually. His relationship with Amon had improved radically since being under his wing and as it turned out, Amon was actually a pretty cool guy once he got past his serious investigator cover.

"Where are you? You've been out of the office since morning."

"Uh, yeah. Just following up on a lead on Eyepatch."

"What lead? I didn't hear about it."

"I wanted to look into it before telling you. Might be nothing so I didn't want to waste your time."

"Next time tell me, you shouldn't be doing this kind of stuff alone with the pregnancy so far along. Anyway, we put something together for you. Meet us at the office by six okay?"

"Something for me?"

"Don't ask questions, just be here at six."

Amon hung up and Hide tucked his phone away, curious as to what the entire office could be planning him.

_Probably a baby shower. Oh god, please don't let it be a baby shower. I hate baby showers! Then again, I do like free stuff._

He debated leaving so he could head over to the office early, but his gut told him it was too early to leave just yet.

_He's coming. He has to._

After twenty more minutes, Hide finally decided the next person out of the elevator was the last one he'd wait for. It dinged and he waited...and waited. The doors opened and only two people came out: two young girls. Hide sighed in defeat. It was time to go.

"Onii-san! Don't be silly!"

Hide's ears perked up to the sound of a very familiar little girl's voice. He looked to the escalator and saw moonlight hair and a pale face rising up. It was Kaneki, he actually came. Hide's heart soared with a bittersweet relief. All this time spent wondering where his mate had gone only to see him looking extra ordinary as if the time had no effect on him, smiling down at none other than Hinami-chan who happily held his hand while pulling him along to the bookstore.

_Hinami, you brought him here? I'll have to properly thank you next time._

Kaneki's smile was just as warm and inviting as ever, but his eyes were somber and distant, like he had experienced unforgivable pain. Hide couldn't help but wonder what kind of torment he had gone through these past eight months; did Kaneki think of him? Did he wonder what their baby would look like? Did he know about Hide's lab results? There were so many questions he needed to ask him and each question only lead to more, but there was no way of knowing what Kaneki thought or felt because even though he was just a few feet away he had never felt farther. Hide couldn't approach him, he couldn't let on that he _knew_ where Kaneki would be in fear of pushing him farther away.

So for now, Hide would have to settle for merely seeing him. Together, Kaneki and Hinami disappeared inside the bookstore and like the fluttering of a butterfly's wings, his strong Alpha scent gently wafted to Hide; he breathed it in deep down into his lungs, filling every crevice possible with the sweetness of it until it was no more. His baby kicked away happily, this time pushing against his skin instead of his spine.

"That's your daddy's smell. Doesn't he smell good?"

His chest tightened as memories of Kaneki crawled to the front of his mind, making his eyes tear up as he realized just how lonely he felt. His friends had been amazing these past months with helping him shop for baby clothes and getting his small apartment ready for the baby's arrival, but when it came to choosing a name or figuring out how he was going to manage unemployment and raising a child, Hide couldn't help but feel how much easier it would all be with Kaneki present.

"Shit."

Hide wiped away his tears and sniffled. His mission was done, he saw Kaneki and knew he was alive and well, which meant it was time to go.

* * *

When Hide arrived at the office his suspicions were correct -- Amon, Akira, and his other co-workers had put together a baby shower for him. There were cupcakes from his favourite bakery, some baby clothes, and even a small stroller they had all chipped in to buy for him. As warming as it was to know everyone had gone to such lengths for he and his baby, he couldn't wait for the festivity to end.

He trudged up the steps of his college dorm with his small stroller dragging behind him, breathing heavily with each step as if boulders were bound to his ankles. His baby hadn't settled since seeing Kaneki and eating cupcakes probably didn't help much with its energy; he could tell it was going to be a long night for him. Since working full-time for the CCG, Hide switched his studies to distance learning so he could still complete his degree. He thought it might be more difficult, but he was never good at showing up for class anyway and this actually turned out to be the best decision he made. He had three years to complete his courses so he could take as long as he wanted with his studies.

He walked along the concrete flooring and spotted something white against the grey of his building sitting outside his door. As he neared, he realized it was a giant box of newborn diapers; there was no note attached, but he didn't need one. He knew exactly who left them there and his heart pounded while a smile broke out across his face.

_36 Weeks_

A lot can change in just one month. Not just regarding Hide's pregnancy, but life itself can flip over on its head and leave a person haggard. Senseless. Lost.

About a week after seeing Kaneki, Hide went on paternity leave; at the time it seemed best, but now he wished he had stayed. At least then he would have known about the CCG's plan to raid Anteiku. Touka was with him at his dorm room when the raid started. He could see how pained she was to not be there for her friends, to be stuck at Hide's side like he was some helpless old maid; he couldn't possibly keep her any longer and with his insistence, she left. Hide turned on the news -- a dangerous decision -- and watched as helicopters captured footage of Ghouls and Humans colliding, rapid-fire gunshots lighting up the streets, and -- the camera paused as the anchorman stated it was too graphic for public viewing. In a second, Hide was dialing Akira's number on his phone and to his surprise she answered.

"Hide! Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. What's going on?!"

"We tracked down the Non-Killing Owl to the 20th ward and we're taking him out tonight. Stay in your room, I can send some guards to keep you safe if you--"

"No! What -- what about Eyepatch?"

"Huh? Eyepatch? What about him? Look, Hide, I have to go--"

"Akira, please! I've been off work for a month, just tell me what's going on."

She sighs over the phone; these past nine months had proven she had a soft spot for Hide.

"Amon-san thinks Eyepatch will show up tonight. There's a plan to lead him underground."

"Underground? Why?"

"It's Arima, he's -- shit! I have to go. Stay inside!"

_Arima?!_

Hide remembers Kishou Arima, he had met him a handful of times at work. He was a top-tier investigator; undefeatable, intelligent, and stronger than any other. Hide quickly racked his mind for underground passages near the 20th ward and only one came up -- it was known as Route V. 14 and lead to the 24th ward. If Arima was there waiting, Hide needed to warn Kaneki.

He got up from his bed with a pained groan and threw on the only pair of pants that fit him now, his beloved green sweatpants with his worn-out university logo on one leg, followed by his black sweater before heading out. He only knew of one entrance to Route V. 14, located in the 20th ward where the fighting took place; Kaneki would be furious if he knew Hide was heading there now, but if Hide didn't make it in time, Kaneki may never have the chance to chew him out for it.

* * *

"Haah, Jesus fuck! Got it!" Hide exclaimed after pulling back the manhole cover; he was weaker than he thought and his pregnancy made heavy-lifting almost impossible. He was surprised he wasn't thrown into labour just now.

Getting through the 20th ward was easier than he expected since all the fighting was focused around Anteiku. He wished he could be there to help his friends, but if he wasn't useless before the pregnancy he definitely was now. All he could do was hope they would survive.

Carefully, he climbed down into the sewers, gagging when the strong smell of urine and feces hit him like a brick wall. He should have brought a mask or something, but the collar of his sweater would have to do. If his memory served, there was a side entrance that connected to the underground passage, but looking around the sewer he couldn't discern which way it could possibly be.

He looked right -- it could be that way? He looked left -- could be that way, too? Suddenly, an unexpected pain racked his body, squeezing his stomach and shooting into his lower back; it was a contraction, no doubt exacerbated from lifting the manhole cover.

"Shit! Haaaah -- fuck that hurts!" Hide hissed through clenched teeth while holding onto the grimy, concrete wall for support. His contractions started about a week ago, but after a trip to the hospital he learned it was a false alarm. He hoped this time was the same thing, but then again his contractions had never felt this strong -- tonight might be the night.

_Of course, it would be. Only my shit luck would have tonight be the night. I gotta find him._

Choosing left, Hide waddled along the dark corridor, using his phone's flashlight for guidance while keeping his nose covered.

Turn-after-turn, Hide was sure he had gotten himself lost, but he was too worried to turn around just in case the entrance was around the next corner; but, if he didn't turn around now he might be walking farther and farther away! However, his shit luck flipped on its head when he finally saw a grate on the side of the next corridor. It was open, meaning someone had come this way already. Exhaling a strained breath as his abdomen squeezed the life from him, he lumbered into the raised passage and hurried down the dark corridor. At the end, he could see a dim light that he guessed was the passageway to the 24th ward. As he neared, the corridor opened up to a large opening and at the end was a strange, writhing mass with extended limbs lying on the ground. Hide slowly walked closer until he was just a few feet away, then realized--

"Kaneki? Is that you?"

The thing whipped its head around, its scent hitting Hide and overtaking the sour smell of feces -- it was Kaneki for sure, but he looked so...different. He was wearing a black bodysuit that exposed his back where the two long, centipede-like limbs sprouted outward. His face was obscured by a mask -- it looked more like armour with a single horn coming out from the center and curving down, with one red 'eye' sitting in the center.

"Kaneki...hey man, it's me. It's Hide." His voice was strained as he said Kaneki's name out loud.

Kaneki seemed out of it, staring at Hide warily as he neared, but Hide wasn't scared, only careful. With great difficulty, he lowered himself onto his knees and ever-so-gently placed his hand on Kaneki's shoulder; Kaneki flinched, but made no other sudden movements.

"You okay?"

He didn't answer. Rather, his gaze shifted to Hide's stomach and Hide smiled awkwardly, putting one hand over it.

"Yeah I know, I'm huge. This is your fault, y'know."

Hesitantly, Kaneki's clawed hand came forward until it rested with a feather-light touch over Hide's hand on his stomach. Inside, the baby pushed outward, as if trying to meet his father's touch. Hide shuttered with a bittersweet happiness, his emotions overcoming him like a flash flood until tears spilled from his eyes. He dove forward, embracing Kaneki for the first time in _months_ ; he nuzzled his neck lovingly, deeply inhaling his sweet scent.

"I've missed you so much." He whispered. He didn't know if Kaneki could understand him right now, but he prayed he could.

"I know you've missed me, too. Thanks for all the stuff you sent me. It helps." After that first package of diapers Hide also received clothes, formula, toys, and sometimes even cash. He tried confronting Nishiki about it, but his senpai was smart enough to play dumb about the whole thing.

"Hi...de."

With a sniffle, Hide leaned back to look at Kaneki.

"Yeah? What is it?"

"Hide...Hide..." Kaneki chanted, his hand remaining still over his belly while his forehead fell forward onto Hide's shoulder.

It was painful to see his mate in such a sorry state. Hide could tell he was wounded, weak, and teetering on the edge of surrender. His memories provided an unwanted flashback to that night at Aogiri headquarters when the Ghoul begged for his life only to meet the head of a hammer. There was no surrender for Ghouls.

"Kaneki, listen to me." Hide pushed Kaneki back so they could look at each other properly.

"There's someone waiting for you here. He's very strong, stronger than you. I...I don't think you can beat him. But you've got to prove you're worth keeping alive and if you can do that..."

His words veered off. Hide wasn't sure being imprisoned in Cochlea was a better option than death, but if it meant Kaneki would live than it was the only choice they had. An awful, foreboding idea came to Hide's mind then and he swallowed down the lump in his throat before speaking.

"Y-you need to be strong. For me. For us." His hand clasped over Kaneki's this time and their baby kicked about as if agreeing with his father.

"And to be strong I...I want you to eat me."

Kaneki raised his head, but his face remained expressionless. Hide removed his sweater over his head and used his teeth to tear off the hem of his t-shirt. With minimal effort, he successfully used the torn fabric to tie a tourniquette around his upper arm just under his armpit, cutting off the circulation.

"You have to live, Kaneki. Take my arm."

Kaneki was still, staring at the arm like a dead fish.

"Take it! Hurry!"

He wouldn't move. Was he hesitating or just stupid? One last time, Hide pulled Kaneki into a loving hug, his tears coming back worse than before; he kissed his lover for a final time, wishing his weird mask-armour-thing wasn't blocking his mouth so perfectly, forcing him to only kiss his cheek.

"I'm doing this because I love you. Don't hate yourself after."

Using what little nails Hide had, he tore deep, painful scratch marks into his arm until tiny droplets of blood seeped to the surface.

That got Kaneki's attention.

His face turned to Hide's arm and though Hide couldn't see the face he was making, he could picture it was bordering on excited. He stuffed the arm of his sweater into his mouth to muffle his screaming and within seconds Kaneki's hands were on him, his armoured claws digging into Hide's skin as if it were wet tissue paper.

_**CR--ACK** _

"NNNNNNNF!"

He knew there would be pain, but nothing could possibly prepare him for the shocking, stabbing, insanity-inducing pain of having one's arm broken off their body. There was no luxury of a clean cut with a bonesaw, only the promise of a quick break that a being with the strength of twenty-men could provide.

Hide sobbed into his sweater as his snot and tears dripped onto the thick fabric. His arm broke off with a resounding snap; however, with the break done, the worst pain was just setting in. A crippling burn shot up through his shoulder and up his skull like molten lava gushing from a wild volcano. Looking to his arm, he was relieved to see his tourniquette had worked in keeping his blood from spouting out -- at least he wouldn't die in a sewer. Not today, at least. The throbbing in his ears had ceased but was replaced with something much more deafening -- the sound of eating. Loud chewing, lips smacking, and the wet sound of something juicy being devoured. Against his better judgement, Hide turned to witness Kaneki with his mouth stained bright red with blood as his teeth tore into his flesh. He resembled a shark -- bloodthirsty and feasting on fresh meat. Hide knew he couldn't stay any longer; he hated to admit it, but he was scared of what Kaneki may do in his crazed state. Not only that, but his baby had stopped moving and _that_ was far more terrifying.

He pushed himself up off the ground, leaving his tattered sweater behind and slowly, painfully, hobbled over to the dark entrance. Looking behind at his beloved Kaneki for the last time, watching him work his way down the lifeless limb like a cob of corn, Hide whispered a bittersweet goodbye and disappeared into the sewer.

* * *

He can't quite remember how he returned to the surface. Though his tourniquette stopped him from bleeding out, his body was still in shock and made his escape nearly impossible. He remembers thinking how stupidly difficult it was to climb a ladder with one arm and how amazed he was by the smell of fresh city air compared to the stench of the sewers. Surely he must have called 1-1-9 becuase the sound of sirens echoes faintly in his mind. However it happened, he was thankful, but now he faced something much more uncertain and bewildering -- the birth of his baby.

"Hideyoshi-kun, how is your pain? Is the morphine working?"

"Huh?" Wistfully, Hide looked to the source of the voice -- an older nurse who is standing by his side with her hand in his, dressed in green with a matching hair cap. There's a wide fabric piece in front of his face, blocking his vision, but he can tell he's in a hospital room.

"How does your arm feel?"

Hide looks to his left arm and clenches his fingers around hers.

"It's fine."

"No, Hideyoshi-kun, your other one."

He looks to his right -- there is no right arm. _Oh, right. Hah, 'right'._ He smiles at his own pun, ignoring the fact there is no right hand to clench but he tries anyway because for whatever reason it feels like he has a right hand to clench.

"It's fine."

"It doesn't hurt?" The worried nurse asks.

"No. There's nothing there to hurt."

She smiles though her brows cinch together in pity. Did he tell them what happened? Did he tell them about Kaneki?

"Okay, Hideyoshi-kun--" a man says suddenly from behind the fabric veil.

"Just 'Hide' is fine."

"Hide. Congratulations, it's a healthy baby boy!"

Suddenly, the room grows silent as the sound of a newborn baby's cries fill the room. The doctor, dressed in green surigcal wear with a mask obscuring his face, presents his son to him, holding the writhing red thing in his hands like a trophy. He's all wrinkly, his eyes are closed as he screams and cries, and his limbs flail about like a poorly-programmed robot, but he's _Hide's_ and Hide cries for probably the fifth time that day.

"Oh fuck." He whispers, his one hand releasing the nurse's and clasping over his mouth as he cries -- sobs, more like.

For a moment, his son is gone as the surgery team dries him off and bundles him up in a pale blue blanket decorated with elephants, but he's quickly back in Hide's arm, crying for the touch of his father and Hide happily gives it to him.

"Shh, sh, sh. it's okay, daddy's here." He whispers and his baby settles instantly.

Somewhere far away, Kaneki lies dying. He fought Arima with everything he had and more, but even his superior regenerative abilities couldn't keep up. He's lost limbs, he's lost his faith, and now he lies in a field of half-dead grass, hoping and praying Hide is safe and wishing he could have seen him one last time.

"What will you name him?" The nurse asks.

Hide peers down at his child wearily as exhaustion comes over him like a crashing wave. As he thinks on her question, his baby opens its eyes, revealing a deep, beautiful gray and his heart aches as he's reminded of Kaneki. He frowns, wishing Kaneki was here to see how beautiful their son is with his shining gray eyes. He tries to brush his hand over his son's face only to realize his other hand isn't there to do so.

"Akeno. His name is Akeno."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh...this is the last chapter >>"
> 
> Okay, it's "technically" the last chapter. Originally, I was going to post this, the epilogue, and the alternate ending all together, buuuut you have all been waiting a very long time and I haven't even started the epilogue yet. Plus, my dad is going to be visiting next week, work is busy (had to pick up shifts to make up for lost ones), and life is generally just holding me back from writing. So I decided to be nice and post chapter 11 on its own.
> 
> ALSO HOW ABOUT THAT ART, HUH?! My lovely friend @lilneki on tumblr drew this for me in exchange for a fic (which I might post if she lets me 'cause it's pretty good) and I just...aaaaAAAHH it's so beautiful I want to cry T_T
> 
> Thank you all for your support and I'll see you around in the epilogue which will ALSO feature some art! Mwah! <3


	12. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The epilogue?? THE EPILOGUE?!
> 
> Yup, it's the epilogue! When I first thought of this story, I didn't want it to be drawn out too long. I read your comments about Hide meeting Haise and it was ALMOST included, but with the timeline and the age of their kid, I couldn't figure out where to fit the meeting in without adding extra chapters. So without further ado, the end! This time, the lovely art was done by my close friend @frenchshiro on tumblr.
> 
> The next chapter is an ALTERNATE ENDING. It's quite emotional (for me anyway lmao) so be warned. Just a heads up, I had a very long internal battle about making it the official ending.
> 
> Thank you for all your support this past year! Just like "Impressions", this story was something I wanted to write for a very long time and now I have finally seen it through. I'll be focusing on commissions for a while, but I already have some new stories planned so stay tuned to see some more from me in the future!! Love you all! <3 <3
> 
> (If you are interested in commissioning me, e-mail me at m-martin@live.ca for details!)

On this hot, summer afternoon, Hide finds himself sitting at the same old wood table that he's been sitting at for years now.  Two, to be exact, but to Hide his solitude feels much longer.

"Dad!  You're not helping!"

Maybe 'solitude' wasn't the right word.  Hide snaps from his daydream and looks to his son who is sitting at the table with him, picking puzzle pieces and gently fitting them into place.

"Sorry.  Drifted off."

Hide follows suit, picking a piece and thinking on where it could fit.  They have been at this puzzle for days now -- his son is only five years old but insists on only trying the "big kid" puzzles, the ones that are 500 pieces or more.  It isn't long before he's daydreaming again as he stares at his son.  His hair has grown out to be a dirty blond, almost honey-brown, and Hide does his best to keep it styled and short, though no one in the country really cares.  His eyes have remained as hypnotizing as ever with their dark gray colouring and by now, Hide has moved on from the pain they cause to focus on their beauty instead.  He's wearing his favourite pair of washed out overalls that bear hard-to-wash stains like medals of acheivements -- the sap from when Akeno climbed his first tree, the deep green from when he rolled more times than Hide could down their favourite hill -- they were memories of their happiest times.

\----

The wind is strong today, but steady.  A stranger slowly walks through the tall, green grass with his palms open so each blade can graze across them; even through his gloves, he can still feel their lush softness.  He had always wanted to live in a place like this; somewhere peaceful and warm, where a person's worries came and went like the winding river nearby -- course and rough at first, but quickly dealt with and gone within a moment's notice.

\----  

Hide still remembers the day his son was born and every moment after.  After he healed from his C-section, he was discharged from the hospital and whisked away by his friends, or at least the ones that remained from the Anteiku raid; he still thinks of those he's lost even to this day.  Akeno was a fussy child.  Always hungry, always crying, and after the raid things only got worse for Ghouls meaning...well, let's just say solitude was the best option.

"Dad, I'm hungry."

Speak of the devil.

"Okay, what do you want to eat?"

Akeno shrugs his shoulders as if he could eat anything and doesn't really care what's brought to him, so Hide gets to preparing some apples and cheese slices, a skill he perfected quickly with just one arm.

\---

He can see the cabin now, its age clearly showing in the rough, patchy wood of the walls and the near-broken shutters of the windows that creak so loud even he can hear them from where he is.  He's thankful for the wind, really, blowing against him as if trying to cleanse him of all his sins and misdeeds, though he knows it would take a typhoon to accomplish such a feat.  

\---

"Dad?  Someone's coming."

Akeno raises up from his knees to his feet on the chair so he can see better, his small hands supporting his weight on the table and he bites his lower lip in curiosity.

"Who is it, Dad?"

"Probably just a neighbour, don't worry about it."  Hide says as he finishes slicing the apple.

"No, it's someone new.  He looks scary."

"Scary?  How?"  He's amused by his son's descriptions sometimes.

"His hair is white.  He looks dead."  
Hide nearly drops the knife and his breath leaves his body all at once.  He wants to look, wants to see if his son's description is right, but he's shaking so bad he's terrified he might collapse or vomit or worse.

\---

The door is wide open -- how welcoming of them to leave their door open to visitors as if there was nothing to fear in the world.  He hopes he can feel the same one day.  As he peers through the doorway he stops dead in his tracks.  A small child looks at him, his eyes full of gleaming curiosity but held back by the fear of a stranger.  Could it be...?

The wind changes its course on a dime, blowing past him now and bringing his scent downwind towards the cabin.  Shortly after the gust has hit the wooden shelter, a familiar, older face looks at him now.

"Hide."  He whispers lovingly.  It's a name he hasn't said for many years.  
He can't hear the man in the cabin, but he knows exactly what he says: Kaneki.

\---

"A-Akeno.  Go.  Go to him, hurry."

Hide tosses the knife aside and rushes Akeno from the chair and out the door.

"But why?  Who is that?"  He asks, doing his best to obey his dad but worried all the same and hesitates when he nears the doorway.

"It's...he's your father.  Go to him."

"Daddy?!"  He calls out much louder than intended and Kaneki smiles.  His cheeks hurt; he hasn't smiled in a long time, either.

"Daddy!"

Akeno happily runs out to Kaneki who holds his arms out to him while crouching down low so he isn’t so intimidating.  He was never good with children, always too quiet or too awkward to be around them, but with his son...it feels natural to be near him.  When Akeno collides into his legs he squeezes them so tight Kaneki just about falls over.  His gloved hands rove through his son's thin hair and he admires the blond colouring he is so used to, but when Akeno looks at him with his gray eyes his heart stops.

"Are you really my dad?" He asks, looking up hopefully at Kaneki.

"Y-yeah.  Um, my name is Kaneki.  I heard your name is...Akeno?"

Akeno nods slowly, mesmerized by Kaneki's eyes and Kaneki worries his left eye might be showing even though it shouldn't be. 

"Daddy always said I had your eyes.  He's right."

Gently, Akeno's small hand comes up to Kaneki's face, his fingertips grazing over his eyelids as if he needs to touch them to know it's true.

Quietly, Hide walks up behind Akeno and Kaneki stands up to fully greet him only to frown in horror when he sees his missing right arm.  The last time Hide saw Kaneki he was going by a different name; he had different friends, different memories, even a slightly different personality, but to Hide he was still the same man he had fallen for so long ago.  Even so, it was painful not to approach him when he was so close.

"Kaneki...it's good to see you." Hide speaks in a whisper like he would to a small animal, but really he's too scared to talk any louder.

"Hide.  Your arm.  Did I...?"

Hide looks down to where his right arm would be, but now only empty space occupies it.

"Yes...but if you hadn't you would have died.  It's done now.  I would have given all of myself to you if I could."

Kaneki can't stop the tears from falling as repressed memories come back to him.  His memory has always been so spotty from his years of abuse so when he remembered seeing Hide in the sewers, he thought for sure it was something made up in his delerium.  But he was wrong -- he had seen Hide and he had fed on him as well.

Kaneki knows he does not look well.  What was a blessing has become his curse -- his RC cells divide so quickly to heal him, they have aged faster than intended.  He looks tired, worn down like a middle-aged man wishing for retirement but knowing there's another ten years to go yet.

"I'm so sorry, Hide."

They come together in a warm embrace and instantly their scents surround the pair.  Nostalgia hits them both hard, making Kaneki sob while Hide silently cries with him, rubbing his back to soothe his years of pain.  His nose nuzzles Kaneki's neck as he deeply inhales his calming scent and Kaneki kisses over the faded bite mark he had left so long ago.  They pull apart mere inches, each wavering cautiously as the same thought occupies their mind: is it okay?  Slowly, their lips come together in a passionate, loving kiss that they had yearned for all these years.  Akeno makes a disgusted face at the sight.

"Dad!  Daddy!" Akeno cries.  

They pull apart; Kaneki wipes his face with the sleeve of his gray sweater while Hide sniffles and quickly wipes his tears away.  Together they kneel down to Akeno's height, each taking his small hands in theirs.

"What is it?" Hide asks.

"Why are you crying?"

"We're happy.  We haven't seen each other for a while."  Kaneki calmly explains.

"Well...what took you so long?"

"Akeno!" Hide scolds.  His son doesn't understand tactful conversation just yet.

"I don't know." Kaneki says woefully. "I couldn't come back.  Even when it felt like I could, I knew it wasn't the right time.  I'm sorry.  I wish I could have come sooner."

Kaneki tightens his grip around his son's hand and leans in to kiss him on top his head.

"You're staying, right?  No more leaving?"  Akeno asks again rather bluntly.  Hide does not want to hear the answer, his heart can't bear it.

"No more leaving.  I promise."

"Then it's okay!  I forgive you, Daddy."

Akeno shuffles in closer so he can fully hug Kaneki now and Kaneki smiles warmly as he returns the gesture.  Hide wishes he still had his phone so he could take a photo, but he knows this won't be the last time he sees them both together.  Collectively, they walk back to the house hand-in-hand to finish their puzzle, eat, sleep, and live together harmoniously until the end of their days with no thoughts of Tokyo or the Ghouls who inhabited it.


	13. Alternate Ending

Hide sits under an old pine tree, thinking on the cold the shade provides and peering up into the bright green of its leaves.  He thinks of all the small insects that inhabit the tree, of how long the tree has been standing here, and wonders what kinds of events it has seen or experienced.

"Dad!  Keep going!"

His son sits in his lap, eagerly awaiting him to finish the new storybook they picked out from the library.  It's not a usual storybook for five-year olds, but his son insists on reading the 'big kid' stories and Hide doesn't have the heart to deny him.

Unbeknownst to them, Kaneki walks towards them through the field of tall grass.  The thick tree trunk hides their presence, but he knows they are there.  The strong wind blows around him in a flurry, turning the field into a sea of green as the grass bellows with each wave.

As Akeno turns the page for Hide, he asks him if his arm ever hurts.  Hide says "only sometimes, but it hurts where it isn't there anymore."  His son doesn't understand how something can hurt if nothing is there.  

"Because my brain hasn't figured out its gone yet."  That's the best way he can describe it.

Kaneki basks in the sunlight; he realizes he hasn't felt its warmth in many, many years and smiles as it warms him down to his core through his thick, black trenchcoat.

"How did you lose it?"  His son asks.  

"I guess...you could say I gave it to Daddy.  He was very sick and needed it. And when we care for someone very much, we make sacrifices for them."

His son looks perplexed, wondering why someone would need another person's arm -- he doesn't know the truth about Daddy yet.

"Did it hurt?  When Daddy took your arm?"

Hide smiles.  "Only a little."

Kaneki stops -- his goal is finally in sight.  After years of wondering, it feels like a dream seeing his true love for the first time in over five years -- overhead, one of many trees that dots the landscape provides a refreshing shade.

"When will I meet Daddy?"  Akeno asks.  

"Maybe one day soon.  I haven't seen him in a very long time, either."

"...do you think he'll be happy to meet me?"

Kaneki bends down on one knee and stares down at the names etched on the gravestone that is hidden by the tall grass by the base of the old, wood tree.  

'Nagachika Hideyoshi & Ken Akeno'.  

His heart swells as his fingers trace the etchings and tears fall freely down his cheeks.  He curses that day in the sewers when he fought Arima; Hide had sacrificed his very being for Kaneki but hadn't made it to the hospital in time.  Between labour and his shock, it was too late.  They had both perished, but not before Hide whispered his son's name to the doctor.

Hide feels a sudden warmth tingle up his spine and through his chest as Kaneki comes to mind; he knows exactly where he is.

"Yes.  I think he'd be very happy to meet you."


End file.
